What do you get when you mix a baby and a fork? An abortion.

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"It's a blimp, it's a hot air balloon!" "No wait, it's your mom."

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Diarrhea

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A white man walking dpwn the street finds a brief-case with a timer on it. A young muslim man says he dropped it. The white man then asked "What's the timer for"? The young man said, "Nothing really, just helps keep the time." They both went their separate ways.

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Q: What is black and can't support a family? A: A bowling ball

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Why couldn't the Egyptian pharaoh solve the Rubik's Cube? He didn't know how.

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Whats worst than getting bombed by the russians? The holocaust!

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What did the robot say to the child? Nothing, the robot malfunctioned and strangled the child.

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Q: A Mexican and a Jew are at a race. Who get hit first? A: None of them because they're from a different religion.

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Why did the Bruins win against the Flyers? ....they had goal tending.

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who would win in a gang battle? WEST COAST SWAG

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Suzie hates cancer, Her granny got killed by a driver that suffered from it

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Why was the black man picking cotton? Because he was in an area where slavery is a socially and morally accepted practice.

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A man shaves at least 3 times a week, yet he has the longest beard in town, how is that possible? He shaves his head because he's embarrassed about his rampant and patchy balding.

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What happened when a star exploded? It killed billions of other sentient beings.

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Why did the chicken kill itself? To get to the other side.

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why weren't all the jews wiped out in WW2 the gas bill was too expensive

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't so much cross the road as he did go down the road, to the supermarket, where he was sold to a family of 5, and taken down yet another road to the family's house, where they enjoyed a nice family dinner.

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Why was the dentist sent to jail? Because he committed a crime.

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Q: How did the black man die? A: He got hit by a car, and we all know that this is painful.

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what happens when you step on a bear trap? Alot of pain.

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How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open it up and stick him in. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Take out the elephant and put in the giraffe.

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Mama Bear and Papa Bear were in court getting a divorce and the judge offered Baby Bear a choice of which parent to live with. "Do you want to live with your mother?" the judge asks. "No! She beats me." answers the baby bear. "OK, then you can live with your father." says the judge. "No! He beats me too!" cries baby bear. So Baby Bear was placed in a foster home.

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Why'd the aborted fetus cross the road? 9/11

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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