Tim: Ya know what was wondering? Paul: What? Tim: Actually, I'm not wondering about it anymore.

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Why are women bad drivers? -There are no roads in between the bedroom and the kitchen.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have amnesia Roses are red

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Why did the boy trip over the garden gnome? He didn't trip. He died of a burst artery.

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What do you call a blonde driving the wrong way down the freeway? Well that depends on what her parents named her, or whether she happens to have a nickname of sorts.

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If Santa's not real, then who pees on the tree every morning?

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Roses are red Violets are red Bushes are red Why's my garden on fire?

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If you riding a jet-ski amd the wheels fall of, how many pancakes does it take to cover a dog house? Blue Ice Cream

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Okay, so your school has a fire drill, and a ginger asks why the alarm went off. You reply, “Some new kid saw your hair and pulled the fire alarm

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Whats black and flys out of a car? Pupies stuffed in a bag.

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A man walks in to a bar, wakes up the next morning with the news that they have found a cancerous tumor in his neck.

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whats worse that finding your having sex with your long lost sister? having sex with your long lost brother

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A. Knock Knock B. There is noone home so the individual goes home

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If a bunch of midgets do the wave, is it a ripple ?

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was an avocado

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why did the Mexican eat a octopus because he was hungry would die if he didn't

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What is duke oxtoby? legend.

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Human is to breast as breast is to nipple as nipple is to milk as milk is to HIV as HIV is to AIDS as AIDS is to death as death is to heaven or hell as heaven or hell is to Jesus or the Devil as Jesus is to God as God is to the Universe

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Ask me if I am a tree Are you a tree? ..no

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What's the difference between Batman and a black guy? One is a guy that dresses up like a bat and fights crime and the other is just a mild-mannered person.

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whats funny about four dead horses in a park ? the horses are dead!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Being a chicken, it had no concept of roads or their dangers and was simply trying to find some feed.

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What do you get when you cross a RPG with a cell phone? A microwave

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When is it ok to drink urine? When you're Bear Grills

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops