Q: what's yellow and can't use chopsticks. A: corn

Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally weighed 500 lbs and it was a bamboo tree.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, get in my bed so i can fu** you!

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? A lot.

person 1: i have a good knock knock joke person 2: ok what is it? person 1: say knock knock! person 2: knock knock person 1: trollollollollollollo

Why did the chicken cross the road? Hold on. Let me think of an answer.

In a nerd wedding they don't say "i do" They say "i accept the terms and conditions"

If life hands you lemons your probably hallucinating.

What did the plane say to the twin towers on 9/11 - Nothing, how do you expect planes to talk, stop hallucinating and stop with the drugs

What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

Why did the stoner visit anti-joke.com? Because he was bored, and probably kinda high.

What did the prostitute say to the nun? It's nice to see you again, Sister.

Your Momma is so ugly, she got plastic surgery.

The jinx machine just stole your money... ... this poem was supposed to be funny

What do you say on a date with Uma Thurman? Hey Uma, pass the salt.

why did I fall off a tree? cause i wanna to

Yo mama so ugly, she has to work harder than most women to attract men.

A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar, they manage to have a delightful evening, despite their religious differences.

How do u say hi to a black person JUST SAY HI RACIST

What do you get if you cross a man and a horse? Severe internal bleeding.

Tim likes girls

You're so gay that you lost your virginity to someone of the same gender.

What would happen if you put avocando, pineapple, sardines, peanut butter, brussel sprouts and milk into a blender and drank it. most probabley salmonala poisoning because the sardines were off.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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