Doctor, my husband tells me he doesn't like my figure .... That's irrelevant now, you've contracted a rare blood disease and will be dead within a month.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being black

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Why was the Jewish man sad? His wife was brutally murdered, His chilren raped, Parents stabbed horrifically and stuffed with turtles and the doctor just informed him that he had cancer and was due to die 17 minutes ago.

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How do you kill a beetle? Wait outside his apartment and shoot him

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When life hands you lemons you can't make lemonade, Sugar and Water are two other key ingredients that were not included with the lemons.

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Two pandas walked into a bar. The bar was in china.

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What's the difference between people with aids and people with cancer? People with cancer can get into heaven

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How many members of Coldplay can you fit in a mini? 4, as there are 4 members of Coldplay.

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Sonny Bono walked into a bar. No, wait, he crashed into a tree.

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What do you get when a bulldog and shitzu reproduce? A litter of extremely cute puppies.

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what did the man say to his cat? sex. -teagan doherty

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Knock, knock! Who's there? orange? orange who? orange ya glad i didn't say your family was dead.

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What did the alien discuss with the other alien? Something we discussed.

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today a nazi canadian killed himself the world is now a better place

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mark is religion

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Batman. Batman who? Batman is stunned by the fact that there is in fact someone that does not know him.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: The farmer decided it was too cruel to fence in the animal, however getting run over by a car was a fate... not worse than death because it died.

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The.

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What do you call a bird with no wings? Dead

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Women's rights

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Roses are red, Wait. Why start this poem when you cant finish it Refrigerator

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knock knock who's there bob bob who bob marley who else

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A bar walked into a bar. To get to the other horse.

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Roses are black Violets are black I'm Helen Keller Everything's black

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops