Why shouldn't women wear watches? Because there's a clock on their cell phones.

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why was the bunny black? because it was born this way baby

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What's the difference between an Asian driver and a Belgian prostitute? Nothing at all: Marie-Edith Yang is proud of her mixed heritage, and earns a decent wage in a relatively clean brothel in the lovely little medieval town of Bruges.

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Q:What do you call a dog with no legs? A:It doesnt matter he's not gonna come

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how do you wash clothes in the diswasher? you turn it on.

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Hey what time is it. 3:15

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A dyslexic pimp buys a warehouse.

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a white guy walks into a bar luckily he is not an alcoholic and knows when to safely stop drinking and already gave his keys to a friend.

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How do you drown a blonde? Hold her head under water.

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Why don't you have a seat, over there?

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Guess what? Chicken butt

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If shes old enough to count..... Then having sex with her would be considered illegal.

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A man walks into a bar. He drinks then comes home to his whole family murderd and mutilated

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whos got a massive fukkinn melon...B.I.M

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Three black guys walk into a gym and play a rigorous game of basketball for an hour

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How many ADD kids dose it take to screw in a light bulb? one; the attention deficit disorder dose not take away the ability too screw in a light bulb.

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What did the doctor say to the morbidly obese man? "You should get on a diet. It's a surprise you're even alive for so long with such a bad heart" The next day the man dies while eating celery.

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What's the difference between a mouse and a dinosaur? A lot.

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Why did the black man run from the officer? The officer was trying to rape him.

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Were both lawyers.

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The procrastinators association meeting has been postponed. - Anonymous

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A man walks into a room with a sly grin on his face, "Tom, have I got a joke to tell YOU!" Tom hurriedly shoos Susie into her bedroom and tells her to lock the door and not open it no matter what. Tom turns to the man, "I've told you twice before to never come back here, I'm beginning to think that you probably don't take what I say very seriously because you might have some sort of chemical imbalance or something in your head, or maybe you're obsessed with my family or something!" The man hangs his head in shame and agrees with Tom, but Tom still had to do something about the intruder so he called the cops. The cops took him to get psychologically analyzed, but Tom didn't know this because he only cared that his daughter Susie was safe and he also doesn't have access to the testing facility's records. Tom is an only father.

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A man walked into a bar and was then taken away in an ambulance dude to a severe concussion.

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A man walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic, it's destroying his family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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