Women can vote? wtf

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Timmy stop making noises while mommy is working. I have to finish these TPS reports or else my boss will be very mad at me and we won't have Christmas again.

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Q:What's the difference between a pinata and a baby? A: One I hang from a tree and beat to death and the other one is a pinata..

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him to leave.

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If you're American when you go into the bathroom, and you're American when you come out of the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom? Well, that depends if the apocalypse was happening and if there were even any Americans left at all.

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Two gays walk into a bar, they are then kicked out by the homophobic owner.

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What does a car and a t-shirt have in common? Nothing.

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After a long romantic date with my girl friend I went home. Upon walking to my bathroom for a dootie i realize that I'm gay. So I break up with my girl friend and I am now in a wonderful relationship with Jose, He sell's sea shells at discount prices.

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? He was on his way home from work and saw some youths loitering on the street corner and thought it best to avoid them and therefore any possible confrontation. He would also appreciate it if you would call him something along the lines of Bravery impaired instead of a chicken as he finds it offensive and doesn't fully understand the avian reference to his lack of confidence.

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What do you call a dumb Asian? An Asian who lacks education.

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What do you call a blonde with one leg? Heather Mills

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What's worse then running out of toilet paper? Getting shot

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? 452

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What did the baby said to her mother? Nothing because she aborted him

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why did the kid let go of his kite? He got struck by lightning

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A man asks his doctor if you can die from drinking to much water. The doctor replies 'Yes you can'

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What is something you would not normally find in a china cabinet? Japan

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What goes from pink to red in 5 seconds? A pink shirt when red paint is spilled on it.

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What did one muffin in the oven say to the other muffin Nothing food doesn't talk

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Wanna hear a joke? no

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"What starts with F and ends with a K?" "firetruck?" "no, f u c k"

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Did you hear about the red ship and the blue ship that collided? Everyone on board died.

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What was John Lennon's last hit? The pavement.

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Humans are pathetic: What kind of heaven is it when you die, and learn that everybody you love chose the wrong religion and is burning in hell? Moral: Human garbage!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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