What do you call a midget sitting in a tree? Jim, because that's his name.

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ok last night i found a pic of romney saying "if i win the election 8 million people will have no job" then Obama says hey romney now that i won the election it would be 8 million and one stupid.

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What has four wheels and smells like an asshole? YOU.

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Roses are red Violets are blue This font is black You smell like shit

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Why is my penis so damn small? Cause the good lord made me that way

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what's hard and pink going in a soft and wet coming out Gum

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why did the walrus sex with the jew because 911 created a sexual falafel

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Q) What did the cowboy say to the astronaut? A) Howdy.

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Jamie: Peter your hands smell like cows! Jason: eeh no they smell like cows balls

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Rampage, on the streets of the poor. Secrets finally leaving, escaping, rummaging out from the land and sea of unforgiven people. A loud shatter erupts from the roaring streets filled with silence, the people are coming. Engulfing the city. Red, blue, orange and yellow. Explosives and gun fire and blood flowing down into the drains, mixing innocent blood with the impure water. Violence, detonating everywhere. I see fire everywhere. Once a family home now a lost memory which cannot be found. Everything is burning, life and love. The streets not painted with red. It's soothing the sidewalk. Hush now. A shadowy night. It's whispers reaches all corners of the earth... 'The war is over' Blue skies light up the back lanes, darkness retreating back under its box of everlasting mystery They fought a war We are fighting one too (first letter of each line + final 2 lines are the last two lines of the original poem etc)

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what do u call a joke with no punchline? A joke with no punchline

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Why did Susie fall off the monkey bars? She had no arms.

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A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

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Ian: Your Mama's so dumb, she tried to commit suicide off a sidewalk. Dan: Yea, and when that didn't work she hanged herself.

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Q: What did ine sweaty arab man say to the other sweaty arab man? A: "I'm sweaty"

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A man walks through a doorway but there was a door there so he got injured

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What do you call a 3 legged dog on a red unicycle? An unlikely set of circumstances.

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What did the starving kid say to the starving parent? Pineapple

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I have an erection My mom!

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Hey, you know what would be funny? A joke.

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What did the white male say to the black male who had just robbed a bank? I'm glad you have a reliable source of income to feed yourself and your family

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had the utmost desire to.

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why did the baby fall down the steps? Because there was big earth quake that blocked his parents on the other side of the house, therefor leaving no one capable of getting to him befor falling

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A circus clown riding the cutest miniture Shetland pony both fall over a cliff and die.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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