what did jake say to the priest? hmmm, salty

What's faster than the speed of light? Not a car

did you know why people keep saying "you know...you know..." in their conversation? well i don't know

whats worse than someone on the phone during a movie? your mother queefing on your bowl of cheerios

Politics

How do you tell if your boyfriend is gay? He is having sex with men

Two men walked into a bar. The third transformed into a duck and flew away.

i like cats

THIS IS an anti-joke.

What is the answer to life, universe and everything? Nothing.

What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot.

Why were the kids screaming? They were being chased by a giant ferocious spiny lobster.

joe: guess what. Bob: what. Joe: nothing I just wanted to talk

So there was once this cool little dude that had a purple nose. People would walk by on the streets and say, "Hey! That's a cool nose!" Purple nose man appreciated that they didn't pretend it wasn't there, and instead celebrated the diversity. The next day, he was scalped.

What did the ocean say to the beach? Nothing, oceans and beaches are both not alive, thus incapable of speech and feeling emotions

Why do gingers get mad when people call them gingers? Because it hurts their feelings

What do you call a man with no arms or legs skiing? Skip.

An owl and a squirrel where siting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl then turned to the squirrel and said nothing... cos owls can't talk. The owl then eats the bird because it is a bird of prey

An African-American is working on math problems and notices an Asian man walking by. The African American asked,"Could you help me out on these math problems?" The Asian man replied, " I have never been good at math."

What does a frog in a blender sound like? *WWWRRRRRRRBFFFFZZZZZCHWEEERRRRRR*

April showers bring... tornadoes that kill families

Boy: Knock Knock. Man: Who's there? Boy: Doctor. Man: Doctor Who? Boy: Haha! The man then invites the boy into his home, where he gives him a glass of lemonade laced with Ruphalyn. He then proceeds to take off the boy's clothes and rape him. When the boy awakes, the man starts to fear for the police discovering the boy in his home, so he kills the boy and cuts off his limbs and head, and buries the body parts in a hole in his backyard.

PICKLES

here is a good joke... your moms a bitch END OF STORY!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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