Whats white and bad for your teeth? A refridgerator

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? Dead babies can't paint.

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How many pieces of gum are in 5 gum? 5. i meen 7

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Dylan is gay

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How come Asian's are so clever? Their baby food is blended textbook paste.

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He got AIDS and died.

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Guy: "Did you hear about the guy who cried wolf?" Friend: "Yes. He was pulling your leg. People cry tears not wolves." Guy: "How did you know he was pulling my leg?" Friend: "If you look down, he's still there pulling it."

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Her lips are not proportionally fit to her face.

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What did the shit covered people licking each others scrotums call themselves? The Aristocrats

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Why did the train stop? - It was surrounded by elephants

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What do your mum and dad have in common Not much your dads dead

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing. She's already been told twice.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He died! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was attached to the first! Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game! Why did the fridge fall out of the tree? The branch broke! Why did Sally fall off her bike? She got hit by three monkeys and a fridge!

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Justin Bieber is having sex with a girl. He then awakes from this horrible nightmare.

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A guy walks into a bar Many people gather around him to see if he is alright and to tell him he needs to watch where he is going.

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why didnt Tim Tebow go to church? He had practice half an hour before the service was scheduled to start, and to do both was impossible and missing practice would have resulted in disciplinary action from both his coaches and his teammates.

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Why did the bird fall out of the sky, It hit one of the random green pipes.

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What do you call: A black person, A white person, A mexican, A Jew, And an athiest? Whatever their names are!

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Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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What do you call a Man who likes little childeren A Nittany Lion.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Cancer.

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Ask me if I'm a tree I don't need to, because I know you're not a tree

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A man wearing a 'What Would Jesus Do' bracelet and a livestrong bracelet goes up to a blind kid and rubs his eyes and the kid can see. The kid was was not used to the bright lights and wandered into traffic, was hit by a car and killed instantly.

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Women's rights...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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