Why did the cook throw up at McDonalds? Because his pay check was made out to the Ronald McDonald Foundation.

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Why did the man drop one dozen long stem roses? Because he was hit by a taxi cab

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Ding-Dong.............no knock-knocking required

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41

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a black guy, a white guy, and an asian guy walked into a bar. It was an interracial bar, and served men and women of all nationalities.

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Why did Suzie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

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Why'd Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's There Not Sally Why was the boy sad? Because he dropped his ice cream cone Why'd he drop his ice cream cone? Because he got ran over by a bus Why'd he get run over by a bus? BECAUSE SALLY WAS DRIVING

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Britney got to the top of the building. What did she do next? She jumped off to end her miserable life

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Roses are red violets are blue I have alziemers banana cookie!

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Engage in a lively debate with a friend, and when they are about to stump you, respond to whatever they say next with "What does that have to do with the price of tea in China?"

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? -Because it was dead Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? -Because it was stapled to the first koala

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Wanna hear a joke about a baby with AIDS? It never gets old.

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Why are there no casinos in Africa? Because of the exceptionally high poverty rate.

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A ham sandwich walks into a bar, bartender says "We don't serve food here."

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?2 guys walk into a bar. One gets a beer the other get water.

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All your base are belong to us. Shame on you for making fun of the Japanese. They can't help their broken English sometimes. How would you like it if someone were to nitpick about every single word you typed? Yeah, bet you wouldn't like that, would you? Would it make you feel a bit more guilty to know these people suffered through a horrible earthquake and tsunami - and still managed to survive? Huh? Or that they continue to outshine most other countries in the world in the field of high-technology? Sure, maybe they DID blow up Pearl Harbor in 1941 and send us reeling into another World War. Everyone makes mistakes. Based on the past, "All your base are belong to us" seems pretty trivial now, doesn't it? Go apologize to a Japanese man right now, and never speak of this again.

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Why is a T-shirt like a topaz statue of the Archangel Gabriel? They both start with 'T'.

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Steve Mullings isn't on drugs

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If you're American when you go into the bathroom and you're American when you come out of the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom? Magic.

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What is in your backyard and is stalking you? Corn

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Why was the boy sad? His parents died in a horrible accient earlier that day.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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Your Momma's so ugly, she went to the grocery store, and went she got out of her car, people said, "You're ugly."

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Jesse is so fat, his weight on his scale says " hahaha gotta love childhood obesity"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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