What smells like curry and bombs? A dead Indian

A man walks into a bar He has a water, he is sober

What's the difference between Santa Clause and Tiger Woods? One is a mythical person who parents exploit to get their children to behave due to lack of parenting skills.

Why did Tyrone try to sell Timmy some blow? Due to his poor educational background, lack of recommendations, and a terrible job market, Tyrone wasn't able to get a real job and had to resort to selling illegal narcotics. This wasn't something Tyrone wanted to do, because he promised himself he would never end up like his father, but this was the only way he could support his family.

a black guy and a mexican are in the backseat of a car, who's driving the car? the owner of the car.

Knock Knock. Who's there? UPS.

Knock knock! "It's unlocked"

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

Why did the Chicken cross the road? It didn't, it was in a chicken pen.

A girl hears a noise in the middle of the night in her kitchen downstairs. She walks down halfway through the staircase and asks if anyone is there, as if the intruder will say, "Yes, I'm in the kitchen. Want me to make you a sandwich?" *This will never happen. Movies are stupid when it comes to these scenes. No one will actually ask if anybody is there if they hear a noise in the middle of the night.*

1 + 1 = 11 Just kidding, it's 2 you moron.

why did obama become president? people voted 4 him.

why did sally fall of the swing? because she had no arms... knock knock? (whos there) not sally

Why can't the orphan play baseball? He can't find home.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I've got a shotgun, Give me the money.

What's that Lassie? Timmy fell in the well again? And you couldn't care less because the stupid kid never looks where he's going?

Whats worse than getting stabbed in nuts? A retarded baby that survived the abortion

Why doesn't a woman need a wrist watch? It is rapidly becoming outdated and most cellphones these days have the time, but if they like the style they are free to use one.

How many NRA members does it take to change a lightbulb? MORE GUNS!

crips r blue bloodz r red choose crips nd thn ur dead (bloodz swoopp)

whats worse then justin beiber NOTHING

How do you get a Mexican's attention? "Excuse me, may I have your attention?"

How did the fat woman survive the car accident? She had on her seat belt.

Your dick is short, If we compare it to mine. That was it, Thank you for your time.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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