A cup of ranch walks into a lemon

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Women's rights

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Roses are red and so is venus now kneel down and suck my penis:)

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Yo mama's fat.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs, flotaing in the sea? Someone who will drown very soon.

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What's worse than sex with a midget? Non-consensual sex with a midget.

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Why did the man tell the other man to shut up? The other man said something that made this particular man mad which drove him to tell the other man to shut up.

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Q: why can't dinosaurs sing? A: because they're dead!!!

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what's 6 inches long and women love? my penis

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A man once went duck pin bowling, 5 years later he died of leukemia.

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life is like a box of chocolates... it doesnt last long for fat peopl

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What is BIG, STIFF, AND FULL OF SEMEN!!!? A SUBMARINE!!!!!!!

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How do you treat lice Avoid getting them

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Yo mama's so stupid, she put the baby in the microwave

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What do you get if you cross James Bond with Osama bin Laden? James bin Laden.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Back when seven was in Vietnam, he sufferd Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and constantly has flash backs and irrational thoughts of six being with the veitnamese alliance and tries to viciously molest six whenever he runs out of anxiety medication.

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Why did the boy in a wheelchair cry? His mum just got shot in front of his eyes.

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Who has two thumbs and lost them? Me but I can't really point at myself due to the lack of thumbs.

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Jim and Larry work together. Jim works hard, and Larry is a bit of a prankster. One day, Jim is having a rather rough day, and Larry looks to cheer him up with a good-natured joke. Knowing that Jim's wife prepares dinner for him every night of the week, he calls her and tells her that their boss has decided to pay for a dinner out, that she should take the day off and just get ready for Jim to come home and pick her up. Larry will later follow up by calling a pizza delivery place and having them send a special no hard feeling message with two large delicious pizzas. He forgets to call the pizza delivery man until later that night, after which it's too late and he thinks "I'll just explain the joke to Jim tomorrow." And goes peacefully to sleep. Arriving home and finding that dinner is not prepared, Jim savagely beats his wife.

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A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit and. the bear eats the rabbit in a whole bite without chewing...end of story...the end

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Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He had a stroke.

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What did the cat say to the dog? Meow.

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Knock Knock Who's There Gary Oh hi Gary, come in

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If a canoe is stuck in a tree with its headlights on, howmany pancakes does it take to cover the roof of my house? False, snakes don't have armpits!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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