John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

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What did the convicted child molester say to the little girl? Nothing, they cut his tongue out in prison.

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What did Michelle Obama get for Christmas? Cancer

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Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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What did the young man's clothes smell like after a long night of partying? Laundry detergent, it was quite pleasant

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How do you pacify Hitler? Give him jews.

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Q: What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? A: I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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to the one below me. YEAH RIGHT!!!!!!!!!!

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Get a ladder from your house and kindly help him down.

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What's worse than losing the remote? Dying of cancer.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The Grim Reaper. The Grim Reaper who? Joking with me will not postpone your death.

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what do u get when you cross a kangaroo and an elephant a genetically disformed animal comes out who dies shortly after

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What do you call a drunk, blind, deaf monkey driving a car? A bloody good driver!

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What happens when you shoot a priest in the heart? He dies.

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Why did Justin Bieber smile in his mug shot? He did not understand the consequences of his horrible actions that could have killed many innocent men, woman, or children and, in jail, there could be very dangerous people living there.

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What's the difference between a monkey wrench and a snow cone? A lot.

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Roses are red lemons are sour open Your legs and gimme an hour!

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Person One: Knock Knock Person Two: Whos there? Person One: You can see its obviously me because theres not really a door there.

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Q:Do you know why Jesus would not be a good goalkeeper? A:Because he never played football

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what do you call a fat black cat and a skinny white dog? Freckles and Spot

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Why did the chicken die? He tried to cross a road by an alleyway, therefore getting hit by a double decker bus and the alleyway has nothing to do with it. Also, the chicken had one leg and was blind.

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Roses are red, violets are blue I've got Alzheimer's cheese on toast

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A man rode into town on Friday and stayed a while and then left on Friday how did he manage this?

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How many Jews can you fit into a car? Well, it depends on how many Jews there are and what kind of car it is.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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