Bob: Oh, there was a big surfing competition in Hawaii. Bill: that's really cool. Bob: yeah, there were huge waves up to 53 feet. Bill: Awesome! Bob: Yeah there was a Japanese guy that won. Bill: Wow, that will bring up the spirits of japan. Bob: Yeah, but he got disqualified. Bill: No, how?!?! Bob: he was surfing on his dresser.

You can pick your ur nose u can pick ur friends u just can't pick ur friends nose.

Do you ever feel, like a plastic bag? No, because plastic bags are man-made inanimate objects.

why didn't your dog come home last cause he died

How can you tell your woman is cheating on you? When you witness her having sexual relations with another man that she is clearly enjoying.

A woman goes to the doctor.....She has terminal cancer.

How do you get a black man out of KFC? Tell him to get out

John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

How do you scare Chris Ferguson? No one knows, he always has a pokerface on.

Your mama's so fat.... I ran around her twice, And got lost

Why didn't the poor man buy a candy bar? He wasn't hungry.

There were 3 guys named Sean, Ryan, and Eye. They were best friends. However, things escalated when Eye slept with Sean's girlfriend and Ryan found out. Ryan felt he had to tell Sean that Eye slept with Sean's girlfriend. Ryan went up to Sean and said "Dude, Eye slept with your girlfriend!" Then Sean shot Ryan in the head before Ryan realized what he had said. Game Over

Why is my room black and white? Because your in a black and white movie.

What do Native Indians and Asian Indians have in common? They're both human.

Jack be nimble. Jack be quick. But Jack still couldn't out run that bullet.

What did the girl say to the mute? "Why are you so quiet?" How did the mute respond? He flipped her off.

A zebra and a giraffe are out in a safari and they see some humans. And then the cow, was drinking, the man was milking the drink, when the giraffe was going to buy some milk. She said, the was yeah okay.

Why do we park in driveways and drive in parkways? Good question.

Whats better than 24? 25.

Beka has AIDS

A dog walks into a bar and the bartender gives him a bowl of water because it is hot outside and he doesn't want the dog to dehydrate because he could die.

Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I am a dog.

Why didn't the blond cry at her child's funeral? She died, too. It was a terrible accident.

Why did Joe wake up screaming? Because his wife cut off his penis.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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