Whats worse than runing over a box of kittens? Runing over two boxes of kittens.

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Why did the duck eat the chicken noodle soup? The duck was told that if he ate the chicken noodle soup on Fear Factor he would win $10,000. What he failed to realize was that he forgot to sign page 16 on the episode contract and did not win any money and was sued by Campbell's soup for copyright infringement.

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A loving father took his two children to the park for a picnic. while the children went into the lake for a swim he drowned them both

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Q - Why did the boy die? A - He had AIDS because his father raped him.

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, didn't you read the sign on the front door? It says, "People with suits on will not be served." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

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An Irishman, an American, an Australian, a Chinese man, a Turk, a Brazillian, a Canadian, a Jew, an African, a German, a Mexican, a Norweigian, a Swede, a Spaniard, a Russian and an Indian walk into a bar.

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What is the best time to go to the dentist? During office hours 2 or 3 times a year to ensure optimal dental health and hygiene .

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'A blonde', 'a brunette', and 'a redhead' are ways of referring to women who have hair of a certain color.

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What's big and long? My dick.

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What is the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One you can smash with a hammer and the other is just a watermelon.

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What's red and has wheels a red car....

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead

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what do you call cheese that isn't yours? cheese.

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A blind was staring at a girls ass. Her boyfriend promptly bludgeoned the man unaware of his illness.

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What's green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree, it'll kill you? A pool table.

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A teenage boy is getting ready to take his girlfriend to prom. First he goes to get a tux but there's a long tux line at the shop and it takes forever. Next, he hast to get some flowers so he goes to a florist and there is a huge flower line there. It takes forever but he gets the flowers. Next he heads to get a limo, unfortunately there is a long limo line at the rental office and it takes a long time but he gets the job done. Finally the day of the prom comes and the two are dancing happily and are having a good time. When the song is over she asks him to get her some punch, so he heads over to the punch table and there is no punchline.

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Me: f*** off Asshole: YOUR MOM! Me: -is dead.

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'l give you a nickle to tickle my pickle i'l give you a dime to take you time

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You are walking down the street, and a man keeps on getting in your way. You want to politely... Screw it already and stab him in the back

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What did the Wind say to the Window? (Insert Racist punchline here)

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Why did the pilot crash the plane? It was a tomato.

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My daughter's so smart, that instead of texting K, she writes Potassium.

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What did the greeter at walmart say to the black man? Welcome to walmart.

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I once ate at a restaurant where the food was so bad that the chef's name was Earl.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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