why did arno fly away? he was a bird

What's a vampire's favorite dessert? Vampire's don't exist What's Helen Keller's favorite dessert? Helen Keller doesn't exist

An optimistic person says the glass is half full Pessimistic people say the glass is half empty Engineers say the glass is 2 times the size it needs to be.

why are there so many homeless asians with squinty eyes, they cant find their way back home

Q: why didn't the asian boy ask for a calculator? A: you don't need calculators to make shoes

Why did the chicken cross the road? Chickens can not talk, therefore we can never find out from the chicken, who is the only thing that knows why it crossed the road. Scientists have study chickens and say that it most likely saw something edible, like a bug or some grain and walked over to eat it.

What do you say to a friend when they're feeling down? The Game

What's funnier than slapping a girl? Calling the cops on the person who slapped her.

what happened when steven hawking's date stood him up? he feel down

One day a man woke up and decided that he was going to do something with his life. He then got a haircut, took a shower and bought a nice new suit. After that he went home and cleaned up his whole house and invited his parents, that were not very close with him, over for dinner.An hour and thirty minutes before his parents got there, he went to the store to pick up some food to prepare for the very important dinner. On the way home he see's a homeless man walking on the side of the road. The man felt bad for him because he was poor so he gave him $10. He then proceeded home to make the dinner. The dinner turned out very well and he went to bed a better man.

ask me if im a door yes

Why is 6 afraid of 7? 7 is a terrorist.

Why did Sam have no friends? Because he was dead.

What did the drunk man say to his wife? "I love you, Honey"

What happens when you are caught in the serious offense of killing somebody with intent? You get in trouble.

This is funny.

A black man and a white woman walk out of a mall restroom holding hands and sweating. The white woman is arrested on the spot for statutory rape and sent to prison for 10 years. The black man was barely 16 years old.

What's the difference between a clown and a dead baby? One makes people laugh and the other is a clown.

Your mom is so fat, she has sleep apnea.

So Bob walked into his house after a long day at work and layed a rope on his bed. A few hours later his wife came home and found a beautiful tire swing in their backyard but her husband shot him self in his throat.

How long did the Hundred Years' War last? 116 years.

if a dog eats a hot dog what will happen? (leave a comment to find out)

Q: why did the plane crash? A: because jack daniels equals 7

A blind man walks into the girls bathroom.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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