What's three times More dangerous than a war? Three wars

why cant ben cry, because i gorged his eyes out with a popsickle stick.....

Why did Bob fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there Obviously not Bob, Idiot What did Bob get for christmas? A glove Actually, I lie. He hasn't unboxed it yet.

how do u make a sausage roll push it down a hill

How many pupils does the teacher have? 2.

Q:Where does a woman work at if she has 1 leg? A: IHOP!!! :)

Why did the chicken cross the road? To meet his friend the horse at a bar

How many dead babies can you fit in a tire? It depends on the size of the tire.

What do you call a mexican driving a plane? Well.. nothing because you can't drive plane's but if a Mexican man was able to FLY a plane, he would be a pilot.

How do you make a blonde happy? Do something that causes that person to release endorphins.

216-409-7176 Call me.

Wanna see me count to ten? 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10.

So a Jew is walking on the street and he sees a penny, and he decides to pick it up because ever since the fire that killed his family and burned his house down he has been living on the street and he needs all the help he can get.

Roses are blue Violets are buckets this poem makes no sense Washing machines

Roses are red Violets are blue My friend has diabetes Stop posting diabetic jokes

Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything is black, I am blind.

A man became infected with Staphylococcal Food Poisoning. The doctor said, "You only have 24 hours to live." He died 24 hours later.

What's the difference between Elisabeth Fritzl and Pope John Paul II? Pope John Paul II wasn't imprisoned and raped continuously over a 24 year period in a horrific act of cruelty by his father

Ahmed walks into Abbar. He apologized and they both continued about their jobs as sales assistants at Pottery Barn.

Whats green and has wheels?? - Grass, I lied about the wheels

Your mom is SO ugly, I entered her in an ugly contest, and she came in fourth place!

Wife: "I suggest you check properly next time you lose your keys so that you find them quicker" Husband: "I suggest that next time I sit down and have a beer while I wait for Doc Martin and his time machine to give my keys back.

What is the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus? There are many, no human being is exactly alike.

What do you do when a taco eater gives you guacamole? Thank him, and politely smash it in the face of the nearest trashy tourist.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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