What did Washington say to his men before they got into the boat? Men, get in the boat!

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WEED!

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How do you change your dishwasher into a snowblower? Give her a shovel.

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Yeah sure comment below, and soylent green is fucking people! Moral: "You are judging the spitting image of yourself, except that you are doomed to remain ignorant and judgmental"

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How do you kill a black man? You drop a fridge on him.

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If I just post the same thing someone else posted and say it was mine, I'm gonna be really popular because everyone is too dumb to realize it's not my original work of genius.

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there was once a time before tht time when there wasnt bonerss there were erectionss CC

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Q:Why did Sara fall off the swing? A: Because she has no arms. ..... Knock knock! who's there? Not Sara, she has no arms and doesn't have the abitlity to knock.

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how many Pikachu's can you get in a mini? 14.

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why did the chicken cross the road i hate it when people ask questions they already know the answer to

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Roses are red Violets are blue I own a lawn mower Can you swim?

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog.

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Roses are red Violets are FUCKING VIOLET NOT FUCKING BLUE

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How do you describe a funny man on stilts? Stand up comedy

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm extremely unstable. And So are you.

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Q:Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A: A terrorist threw a refrigerator at him then slapped the ice cream out of his hand

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roses are red violets are blue i fucked your mom so did you

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Knock Knock Who's there? Gestapos.

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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whats blue and fuzzy?.... blue fuzz

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What's the best thing about having sex with twenty six year old's? I am twenty one and prefer older ladies as I find them more experienced and mature.

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Why was it okay for the people in the hospital to laugh at the patient with narcolepsy? It wasn't. The patients were treated due to moral obligations. But the doctors that laughed had either been fired or warned, depending on if there were previous reports of exploitation of patients.

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What do you call a sheep? something to have sex with.

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You're so gay that you lost your virginity to someone of the same gender.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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