Get a life besides thumbing down statements telling you advice.........

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What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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All the kids at school we're playing soccer on a sunny day except Jenny, because she had a headache and didn't come to school that day

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Why did the robber wear a mask? Because he had eczema.

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spell backwards: taco cat

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the chicken whent boomand then died

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How do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot.

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Q. How do you wake up a sleeping rich man? A. By splashing acid in his face

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?ti saw won troffe eht htrow t'nsaw yllaer siht

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what did one sandwich say to another sandwich? nothing, sandwiches cant talk

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Why did William commit suicide? Because his grandmother had recently died of terminal cancer. His mother left him on the front step when he was two, and moved to Tennessee with her baby daddy.

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How many dyslexics does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dyslexia is a cognitive learning disability characterized by the sufferer's inability to fluently spell, speak and read. Being a intellectual disability, the chances that dyslexia could impair the practical functionality of a sufferer are very slim and hence it it is highly probable that it would only take one dyslexic to change a light bulb in the simplest of conditions. However, to definitively answer this question, I would have to know a range of variables such as the height above the ground at which the light socket is mounted, the physical height of the dyslexic, the voltage and amp characteristics of the light-bulb itself, the physical well-being of the dyslexic etc. These variables are unknown, are not mentioned in the initial question (as is common for this type of question) and hence, I cannot answer this question to any degree of accuracy.

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A man walks into the doctor's office for an appointment. The doctor performs the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's genitals to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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Why did the dog in Detroit die in the street? It was stabbed.

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What number comes after 29? 30.

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Your momma is so fat that she has really high cholesterol but also an undoubtedly warm personality.

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A black man walks in to a 7 Eleven with a gun in his left pocket. He innocently walks over to the place where they keep all the hostess treats, and decides to purchase a pack of crumb donuts. The gun was purely for self defense, it was a bad neighborhood.

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How do you make a mail man cry? Run him over with a forklift.

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You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me!

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an 80 yr old man apllies to walmart

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What do flowers and people have in common? They both die.

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Holocaust jokes are not funny. My Grandpa died in the Holocaust... He fell off of the guard tower.

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What is similar about a white person and a white fence? Mexicans jump them.

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I think I lost my number so can I... No you can't because phone numbers can't be lost

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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