Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because-- ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????? ??????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ???????????????????????????????

Q: what do you call a phone that's fake? A: a phony...

What did lady gaga call her grandpa? papaw razi. even wrote a song about him.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because I threw a fridge at her.

What's worse than having amnesia? I don't remember.

How do you make time fly? You can't, time is the duration of events and therefore cannot "fly".

Q: What would you do if i pushed you down the stairs A: I would suffer from serious head injuries thus filling you with guilt for performing such a deed.

What did the kid use to smell his food His nose

What did the friend say to the other friend? A. Hi friend.

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? It shouldn't take more than one person to do this task, regardless of hair color.

Q: Whats blue and fluffy A: Blue fluff Q: Whats brown and fluffy . A: The bear that killed my parents.

What's the difference between Josef fritsal and a fridge? A fridge can be thrown at a bowl of custard.

How do you make an electrician fall over? You hit him hard with a lamp

...NO.

What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Fish don't run.

Why is ya dad ya dad? ........ because of ya cousin

Q. What is the fastest animal in the world? A. An Ethiopian chicken.

whats funny about a jew burning? Nothing......

What's worse than finding a fly in your soup? Being raped... What's worse than being raped? The Holocaust What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding two flies in your soup

Why did the man scream when his dog ran into the room? Because he was afraid of dogs.

there was an owl, she had a baby, threw up, then died

I always used bra`s so I guess you know, nice I guess. Can you please stop it? I like know I am telling but my mind wont like accept it, and I would just like to shut off the laptop, but I want to keep chatting with you for just a bit more.

What's Jewish and gay? Henry Shine

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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