A man walks into a bar...so what? People do it all the time.

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how do you know when your in love? massive erection.

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What did the angry man with tourette syndrome say when he smashed his thumb with a hammer? Ouch.

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How did the girl with no arms fall out the window? I pushed her.

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why did the duck cross the road? because his d**k was stuck in the chickens a**....

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Three baby seals walk into a club...

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Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? No Neither did she

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What happens when you light a truck full of babies on fire and drive it off a cliff filled with lava and set off explosives when they land? The babies die. www.youtube.com/LouisGames www.twitch.tv/KiLM_Ghostz

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Where did Sally go when she exploded? Everywhere!

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A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I will ask you one question, and that will determine whether you can enter Heaven. Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" "No," the man replies, "I always made sure to apologize." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

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Why did Helen Keller's cat kill itself? It didn't, I did.

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i like my coffee like i like my women. without a penis.

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Q: What did the blind deaf orphan get for Christmas? A: Cancer

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What do you get if you mix a Bulldog and a Shih tzu? A new breed of dog.

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It was Valentines Day today, I thought I should get her something... I brought flowers to her grave.

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What happened when a Black man ran into a white supremacist? They exchanged insurance information

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What did the monster under the bed say to another monster? I have the odd feeling that someone is on top of the bed.........

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Why did moral man lose his superpowers? Because he read the pointless superpowers section and realized its pointless... Moral: yeah this is my power... :(

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what do mexicans and grass have in common You find them both in your front yard

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Knock knock. Who's there? Louis. Louis? Go away!!! Your jokes are so bad! Geez, you guys really don't like me. GET OUT!!! (Door slams; Louis shuffles away with a sad look on his face) -Louis

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Knock Knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who Doctor Octagonapus! BLAAAUUUUGGGHHHH

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Wanna hear something half funny 34.5

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How do you make an electrician cry? You kidnap him and his mother, tie them both to chairs in your garage, and force him to watch you stab his mother repeatedly in the face while laughing and licking up her blood and tears. Then cut his arms and legs off, lock him in a cage with his mothers body, and go in there everyday and eat a delicious meal while watching him starve to death next to his dead mother.

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Whats worse than stubbing your toe? Getting shot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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