I was just thinking in something I swear ... I am still Just, wait, i'll be good

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What's 6 inches long and 2 inches wide and can drive a woman crazy? Money

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What is Justin Beiber's favorite pastime? According to his biography, it's reading science fiction novels

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Women's sports.

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Why do fishermen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up.

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What did one socially awkward kid say to another socially awkward kid? Nothing

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Customer: Waiter, waiter, there is a fly in my soup! Waiter: Sorry madam.

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What was the biggest party of 2010? The Democrats.

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How do you make a model ugly? you shoot her in the face.

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A man walks in to a bar, wakes up the next morning with the news that they have found a cancerous tumor in his neck.

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Why did the baby fall out the window? Because the parents left the window open by the crib.

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Whats The difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash And one is a watermelon

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What state is high in the middle and round on both ends? Onorth Chiarolinao

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How do you get a boy out of bed, you cut off his fingers.

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What do you call a praying mantis at your door step? a Jehovah Witness

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How many pancakes do you need to reach a 2.5m roof? Purple, because aliens don't fly

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Why are apples cheaper than lemons? Because you have to pay less money then lemons to buy them

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roses are reddish voilets are blueish if it weren't for christmas we'd all be jewish

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why didn't bobby eat breakfast? because i stapled his head to the floor

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I'm a little teapot, short and stout. Here is my handle, here is my spout. When I get all steamed up here me shout: Absolutely nothing because I'm a teapot you maniacal psychopath.

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G:nock nock B:come in!

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A black man walks into a bar and see's a mexican bartender. He orders some vodka.

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I Stumbled this site and then read some antijokes, then I wrote a antijoke but I couldn't write a antijoke because their Terms of Service were down so then I lied to them saying I've read their Terms of Serivce and then I lied again, told them I were human, argued by saying "barnote plate" to them. They accepted.

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why don't bears wear shoes? because they have bear feet

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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