Why cant penguins fly? because they cant

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Is maynaise an instrument?

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What was Steve Jobs' favorite fruit? Grapes.

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LIKE THIS!

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what is the difference betweeb 69 and 77? 8

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Why did the boy jump off the building? To get to the bottom.

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Wanna hear a joke? WNBA

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Woman's rights.

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How do you wake up Lady GaGa you set her alarm clock to a reasonable time

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Knock Knock. Whose there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

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Q: what did the black man say after the white man said knock knock A: who's there

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Q: How do you stop a Mexican tank? A: Ask politely.

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What did the thin Italian say to the fat Italian? I don't know, I can't speak Italian.

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What did the pitcher say to the batter who hit the ball very far? Wow, you hit that ball very far.

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Why did the teacher arrive late for class? Because his father had a stroke the night before, and they had to rush to the hospital and because of exhaustion, he missed the bus, and arrived ten minutes late.

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why was the the taxi cab driver having a bad day? because he wasnt making very much money, didnt get alot of customers, some of which were extremely rude, and his entire family just died.

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Suicide Johnny and the Go Kill Yourselves

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like saying the colors of flowers... how about you.

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Why did the boy cross the road? He didn't he stopped and fapped.

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What do you call someone who can't lose? Charlie Sheen

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Dylan Eichas

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Knock Knock Who's there? me oh

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Why did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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Freeza: I am the strongest in the universe! (if you ignore my brother Coola which is much stronger and all...) Goku: You have pissed me off now Freeza, I will now turn into a super Asian and prove to the world that real Asians are actually blonde and blue eyed! (I am sure Goku means Sayans, which is "completely different") Goku: HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARG! Freeza: Omg, he... he... is trying to take a dump! IMPOSSIBLE! I will have to find his balls and caress them... Will Goku ever take a shit? Or reach all new levels of constipation during the series? Find out in the next episode of dragon ball z!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops