What's the difference between a pile of rotting shit about to be re-heated in the microwave and Kevin James's new movie "The Zookeeper" ... Nothing.

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Friends are like potatoes, If you eat them, they will die.

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Why the girl fall off the swing? Someone threw a fridge at her.

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Why was the black man good at basketball? Because he practiced.

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Why did the little girl drop her ball? Because she was done playing with it.

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What did the deaf, dumb, blind kid get on his birthday? Cancer.

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Women.

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whats worse then falling on the ice? -getting raped by a blue whale

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What do you call a person with no eyes? Blind.

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whats green and has wheels? grass i lied about the wheels

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Holocaust jokes are in bad taste, Anne Frankly I won't have any of it.

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knock knock... who's there? uninterrupted cow uninterrupted cow who?? exactly....

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What's worth than a large pile of dead babies? Nothing, you sick freak.

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Why do fishermen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up.

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Hey Skrillex! Can you do me a favor and hold this bass for me? Sure thing, no problem. 3 seconds later... Oops! My bad! I just dropped it.

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Two peanuts are walking down a dark alley. One was a honey roasted.

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What do you get when you cross a gay eskimo and a black man? Nothing, as two male humans cannot reproduce.

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How do you kill a lawyer? Stab him 50 times in the chest, slit him open and take all of his organs out one by one. Burn what you have left. That should do the trick. OMG I AM EVIL

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what did the turkey say on thanks giving? Nothing, he's dead, we ate him!

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Roses are red Violets are blue classic

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Knock knock. Knock knock. Knock knock. I'm hammering nails. Knock knock.

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A blind man accidentally walks into a gay bar. The bartender escorted him out and pointed him in the right direction.

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Q- Why did spongbob go to Detroit? A- He didn't, spongbob is not real. And even if he was, Detroit is not a very popular tourist attraction.

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Why did the boy scratch his back? A:because it was itchy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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