an englishman,scotsman,and irishman walk into a bar the englishman says " a pint of lager please" "that will be 10pounds , says the barman "Im not paying that , ill see you in court" says the englishman . The same thing happens , in turn to the scotsman, and irishman ,and a summons is issued. In court the jugde says "why are you charging drinks too dear?" the barman says "im not, im selling them to a englishman ,scotsman, and a irishman..

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Whats massive, long, hard, cold, and is blue? A penis in an ice cube.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

How do you confuse Hellen Keller? You do not, as she is blind and deaf, and partaking in doing so would be the morally wrong thing to do.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Chuck Norris can beat an eleven-year-old in a fight.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A black man orders a pizza to be delivered to his house. He is delightfully pleased at the speed in which the pizza was delivered and decided he would order from that pizza shop again in the near future.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Goats are like mushrooms. If you shoot a duck, I'm scared of toasters

thumb_up thumb_down +50

A black guy walks into a resturaunt. he finishes his drink, graciously tips the bartender and leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did Johnny's pants fall down? Because he was fat.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's the difference between a ferrari and pile of dead babies? I don't have a ferrari in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

If Irishmen didn't walk out of bars, they would collect and eventually fill the bars of the world and would die given the bars could not support them.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

knock knock whos there **gunshot ...man that gun show next door is annoying

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A dog walks into a bar and falls on his butt beacause dogs cant walk.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? He has flourished throughout his musical career and is a very accomplished man, as he has won many Grammys

thumb_up thumb_down -26

If polar bears were pink they'd be very easy to find

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Yo mommas so fat that when people look at her they say things like "shes bigger than me"

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Hey Jake can I use your lawnmower? Why Michael, so you can run over my cat like you did last night

thumb_up thumb_down -26

You know that feeling you get when you see your crush walking towards you? No, I'm blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call a white guy with 5 black guys. The owner of a basketball team

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Who found Anne Frank? The Nazis

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What did the little boy get for christimas? Nothing because he's a selfish asshole.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

How many blodnes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Approximately 17. with the addition of 6 brunettes.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you a call a black man in a two piece suit? A respectable citizen, racial profiling is ignorant.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did rangler get on anti joke? Thumbs down.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

How does a black man spell Jack J-A-C-K

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops