Roses are red, Violets are blue. Leaves are green, You should know all this by now...

thumb_up thumb_down -17

cory is gay

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q: What is the meaning of life? A: We don't know. Dwight: FALSE. The answer to everything is 42.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what do you get when you you put a knife in a head? a dead body

thumb_up thumb_down -4

5 black men walk into a 7-11 at midnight. They clog the all of the toilets in the mens bathroom causing them to over run.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did the Jew get for Christmas? Nothing. Jewish people celebrate Hanukkah

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Want to hear a joke? Justin Bieber

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Knock knock. Who's there? You know. You know who? "Call him Voldemort.... Fear of a name increases fear of the thing itself."

thumb_up thumb_down +43

what did the downsindrome get for christmas?? A: Aids and a Dead wife

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the boy fail his maths test? He had no eyes due to a vicious bear attack earlier that year so couldn't read the questions or study from books resulting in him not being able to complete the task he was given.

thumb_up thumb_down

How did the man jumping out of the plane at 33,000 feet survive? Because he had a parachute

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Did you hear why the peanut got arrested by walking next to another peanut? One got a-salt-ed

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How do you make a baby stop crying? Make it smell its own diaper then, drown it in its own tears.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

what happens when a hamster bites your arm? your arm bleeds

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What do a duck and a bike have in common? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A drunk guy walks into a bar and falls flat on his back. Upset, he then finds a bathroom. An hour later he is arrested for beating off in the bathroom. off is pressing charges.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the black man get a welfare check? Because he was either unemployed and decided he wanted someone to keep feeding his family, or decided to push forth the unfortunate stereotype of African-Americans not wanting to work and being lazy. Or maybe he didn't, why don't you ask him?

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Hey, I just met you And this is crazy I have alzheimer's Bacon

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Knock Knock Who's there? DC Soames. I'm arresting you for the suspected abduction and rape of Holly Harman.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

If I lock you in a room and let a snake in under the door, what do you get? A problem.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How many dead babies does it take to fill a bathtub? 17

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the young boy say to the adorable kitten? "Aww"

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the fish fly It didn't

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops