- Anti Joke

What do you call a black man that steal from your shop? A thief

The size of Idris Elba's penis

q: whats fat hairy and always eats mcdonalds a playboy model i lied about everything

How do you stop a charging rhinocerous? Nuke africa.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because lately the posts on "anti-joke.com" have not been anti-jokes. Not even a little.

Did you fall on your head when you were a baby Oh, I very sorry.

Roses are read Violets are not green Chicken is good KFC baby, time to get lean

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: I didn't get to ask. He got hit by a car.

knock knock? whos there? eatmop. eatmopwho? HAHAHAH EAT MY POO

whats worse than the Holocaust....6 million Jews

Once there was a rich man who lived in a castle on a hill. One fine morning who awoke and decided to go downstairs to make a cup of tea. As he switched on the kettle, he realised he had no tea bags, and so, went to the local shops to buy some – but when he arrived back, his magnificent castle had been burnt down to the ground. The man, obviously shocked, looked around in hope for some evidence as to who would commit this awful crime, but he saw nothing, apart from a little green man running off into the distance. The man calls insurance and they give him a mansion. One morning in the man’s fine mansion, he decided he wanted a nice cup of tea, so went downstairs, discovered he had no teabags, went to the shop to purchase some and came back to find his mansion was no more than a pile of ash. Once again he looked around and saw nothing other than a little green man running off into the distance. The man calls insurance for a second time and they give him a normal house. One morning in the man’s normal house, he feels the need for a cup of tea. But has no teabags, he goes to the shop to get some and comes back to find his normal house has burnt down. In the distance a little green man is running away. Insurance give the man a small cottage. And one morning in this small cottage, the man goes downstairs to make a cup of tea, but once again he has no teabags. Off to the shops he went to buy some but discovered, as he approached his cottage on the way home, that it had been burnt down. He looked around to see the now familiar sight of a little green man running off into the distance. Insurance give him a caravan. One morning in the caravan, the man discovers, while attempting to make a cup of tea, that he has no teabags. So, naively, he goes to the shop to get some and comes back to his caravan to find it burnt down. He looked up and saw a little green man running off into the distance. The now annoyed insurance company give the man a tent. One sunny morning in the man’s tent - he feels the need for tea, but has no teabags; he goes to the shop to buy some and arrives back at his tent to find a little green man holding a can of gasoline and some matches. The man asks: “are you the one who has been burning down all my houses?” And the little green man replies: “No.”

What did the boy say after he hit his head? I just hit my head.

Why Was Did Jill Cross The Road? She Needed To Get To Work.

a man walked into a bar and said ow

What did the snake say to the mouse? Nothing. The snake ate the mouse.

How do you spell orange? O-R-A-N-G-E-U-D-U-M-B-A-S-S

Q:Why did the Mexican cross the border? A:To come to America to provide for his starving family.

row row row your boat gently down the stream rape

A gay guy asks a boy out and a girl The girl said no but the guy said yes And the two gay guys went to dinner And made out

What did the young boy get His dad for fathers day? Nothing, his dad died from a very aggresive cancer

Why did the blind man itch his knee? He has cancer

How do you confuse a blonde? Wait...what?

One day there was a guy who went on a date with a girl. They went to the movies and ate popcorn. After the movie ended they had a candlelit dinner at a restaurant nearby. The guy ordered a fried chicken and the girl ordered a watermelon salad. They went home after a great dinner. I'm not sure how the story ends but I remember the story was racist.

What do u call a guy that loves the color blue? A smurf

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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