Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar. Homo-sexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual panda just have piece?

You're tall.

Why is Bruce Wayne named Batman and Tim Drake named Robin? They wanted to hunt bats and robins whenever someone does something bad.

What did the Irishman say to the German? "Sorry, do you have the time?"

Knock Knock There was no answer as the house was empty.

Whats worse than your roof caving in on you? Being stabbed by yard gnomes.

What's the difference between an elephant and a Jew. The elephant has elephant cancer.

What animal was two legs and bleeds a lot? half a dog

Roses are red Bacon is also red Poems are hard Bacon

what happened to the slut last time she opened her legs. a bee flew in and stung her. turned out she was deathly allergic. she died a painful death.

A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, get in my bed so i can fu** you!

What is striped black and white? A prisoner in jail arrested for the murder and rape of a 7 year old child.

so there are 2 muffins in an oven,1 says to the other "holy s**t its hot in here!" and the other says,"omg!its a talking muffin!"

what's white and sticky semen

What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? Robin, get into the Batmobile.

What do u call a man who is smart. A lawyer/ genius/ smart man

Why did the chicken cross the road? He wanted to see the CN tower. He was then hit by a fridge dropped by people running tests on the top floor.

I'm Halarious.

Q:What kind of pizza did the World Trade Center order? A:Two Plains

Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because a fridge hit him.

Why didn't little Timmy see the bus right before it hit him? Because he was blind

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A. Treadmil

why did the chicken cross the road? because yo mama so fat and the pig ate my poop

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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