What time is it when an elephant sits on your car? 12:00

Fuzzy-wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy-wuzzy had no hair, Fuzzy-wuzzy died of cancer.

What did the robber take from the store? The managers dick

Doctor, Doctor. I think I've broke my arm! I'm going to refer you to the fracture clinic.

What has four legs, its yellow with black spots, and can run as fast as a Cheetah? Another Cheetah

what did the obese kid get for chistmas? an athsma attack ,which led to death.

roses are red violets should be purple

Your mom is so retard that she needs "special help" from medical professionals. :3 <33

And riiight after you... Hey its always ladies first.

Why couldn't the mentally retarded kid hear? It was too dark.

Is Carly smart? No.

You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't rob a bank! That's a felony. ;)

Did you hear the one about the priest, the rabbi, the astronaut, the olympic diver, the mcdonald's employee, and the web designer? Neither did I...

What is an Indian's favourite country? North Currya

A: If a quiz is quizzical, what is a test? B: A test can be many things: 1. A procedure for critical evaluation; a means of determining the presence, quality, or truth of something; a trial: a test of one's eyesight; subjecting a hypothesis to a test; a test of an athlete's endurance. 2. A series of questions, problems, or physical responses designed to determine knowledge, intelligence, or ability. 3. A basis for evaluation or judgment: "A test of democratic government is how Congress and the president work together" (Haynes Johnson). 4. Chemistry a. A physical or chemical change by which a substance may be detected or its properties ascertained. b. A reagent used to cause or promote such a change. c. A positive result obtained. 5. A cupel. A: Oh.

an american an asian and a jihadist got on a train where did they go no where as the jihadist was strapped to c4

A guy walks into a bar. He orders a coke. The bartender looks at the gentlemen with a little smile and says "Just a coke?"

I like my woman like I like my coffee. Good.

OMG this totally works! Step 1: Hold your breath Step 2: Die

What was so funny about my sister getting raped? Nothing, there's never anything funny about someone getting raped, especially when it is a close friend or family member

What is black blue and screaming? Your daughter when i kicked the shit out of her

What happens if you don't use a condom? The person you are sleeping with may get pregnant or contract some kind of STI or STD. In worse cases you or your partner may contract HIV or possibly AID's.

Want to hear a joke? Women's rights.

when life randomly gives u lemons, u should probably have a stand cuz people are gonna expect u to make lemonade

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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