Why did elmo jump of the cliff caus he was depresed

Yo mama is so fat that it is obvious obesity runs in the family.

what do you do after throwing a water bottle in the trash? Hug a tree

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was attempting to get back to his farm.

raisin boogers

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

Why did the giant try to eat the magical rainbow? A: Because the apocalypse is predicted for the Wednesday after santa gets shot by the evil jolly ice cream man which in secret is cheating on his wife who in turn eats every human baby ever known to man. duhhhhh

If Donald Trump was in Game Of Thrones, he'd probably be a part of The Wall.

God has put a gate keeper at a gate in heaven to listen to how everyone has died. The first guy comes and says, "I thought my wife was cheating on me so when i came home I see this man hanging off my balcony, I thought he was the man cheating with my wife, so I then push him off, but he was still alive, so I threw a refrigerator onto him, that killed him, but I felt so guilty I soon commited suicide" The gates man said, "Wow thats terrible come in." Then the next guy come and he says how he died, "Well you see I was just oiling myself up for my workout, but I slipped, and fell off my 5th story balcony, and landed in some guys 3rd floor balcony I was hanging off the ledge, and a guy came I thought he was going to help me, but instead he pushed me of and threw a refrigerator on me." The guard let him in, and a third guy came. The Guard said,"Man its going to be hard to beat those guys their just sad. Ok how did you die?" The third man said, "Picture this I'm trapped in a refrigerator...

A bar walking into a mans house, then the blonde says stupid words like why did the chicken of the sea cross the road and pigeons go moo moo like a cow.

Guest-knock knock (silence) Guest-hello is anyone there? no go away Guest-looks like there is no one here lets leave

What did the duck say when it walked into the house? This isn't where I live.

1st black guy: get a job 2nd black guy: i have one 1st black guy: okay

What did the gay guy say to the other gay guy Want to make out?

A man went to his doctor and said, "Doctor, every time I hit my hand with a hammer, it hurts!" Then both him and his doctor died; so it didn't matter.

Four blonds are driving to Disney World when they come across a sign that says Disney World left, so they proceed to make a left at the next stop and have a wonderful time in what many people consider the most wonderful place in the world.

I have aids

What is 69? A number that is before 70 and after 68

- Knock Knock - Whos there? - No one

whats fluffy and pink? -pink fluff whats blue and fluffy? -pink fluff holding its breath.

What do you get a kid with no arms for Christmas? Hungry, Hungry Hippos.

What did the 16 year old boy say to the obese girl who failed at typing? "sucks for you bitch-face."

Whats black and has white cream in it? Oreos

YouTube Is Red Facebook Is Blue Porn Hub Is Down You'll Have To Do

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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