Did you know that if you get all your intestines, and laid it out across the floor in a line, you would die?

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Two men and a woman jump out of a plane. They forgot their parachutes and all died.

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Why did the Koala Bear fall out of the tree? Because shortly before, it's life had ended due to lethal chlamydia, which is not uncommon for a Koala Bear these days. Due to it's loss of thought and therefore muscle control, it lost it's grip on the branch it was holding and naturally gravity took over.

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Why does Michael Jackson like K-mart? He does not; he is dead.

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what did the apple say to the orange ? nothing, apples are a fruit and do not have any organs which allow it to be able to talk.

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What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a mustang? I don't have a mustang in my garage..

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Why did the condom drive over his pet mac and cheese? Because his uncle was not george bush.

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Gerald: Hey did you know I was named AFTER Abraham Lincoln? Gloria: Because he was born in the 1800's and you were born and named many years afterward? Gerald: Ah... I guess I emphasized that joke a little to much - I'm sorry this conversation happened

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it.

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What is better than AIDS? Cancer.Cancer and more cancer

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This is my fist. Would you politely run into it as fast as you can?

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Safety in numbers? Try telling that too six million Jews.

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Yar! What be a pirate's favorite football team? The Steelers. I'm originally from Pittsburgh.

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How do you know when someone tells a bad joke? You don't find it humorous.

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a chicken walks into terry's house he penetrates himn

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Your momma's so broke she might be eligible for government assistance. Seriously she should totally look into it.

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Roses are red violets are purple what the hell happened to your ugly face

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Whys the Elephant afraid of the mouse? i dont know im not an Zoologist

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What do you call a bunch of black guys on mars? a problem What do you call 1 million black guys on mars? a bigger problem What do you call all the black guys on mars? a solution

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Yo mama is so fat, that she recieves an allowance due to being physically disabled.

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How did the baby survive the car accident? He didn't. He was killed on impact.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? I don't remember the rest of the joke but your mom's a whore.

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whenever you come out of emma browns bedroom

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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