so a square said to another square,your rather obtuse oh wait squares cant talk,whats going on. later that day,chuckles realizes he isnt funny -chuckles

What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper with some red stuff on it.

I saw a man lying on the floor. He ate too much cake.

Two Mexicans walk into a police station... they don't come out!

Why did john have to have back surgery He needed his back "screwed" up

Why didnt Jimmy go to school on Thursday? Jimmy is a vegetarian!

Why did the motorcyclist die? I heard he was sat on by Chuck Norris.

How do you get a dog off of your roof? Shoot it.

Seeing you happy is what makes me happy Nero, it has always been this way.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Probably because it saw some food, or because it felt threatened on the side of the road it was already on.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: The chicken saw greater opportunities to find food on the other side

What did the Dinosaur say to the Seal? Dinosaur's cant.. wait...

want to hear a joke? Woman's rights

Your friend is so gay that he came out of the closet and was accepted warmly by his friends and family for who he is a human being.

Justin Bieber had sex with a woman.

why did the football coach go to the bank? to make a deposit into his account

The street outside of my house is covered in jelly. I have done this.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a women.

what are you eating under there? oh a sandwich, its actually really good.... want a bite? yea thanks! yum yum

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust What's worse then the Holocaust? Two Holocausts

Why did Billy stop playing baseball? He lost his legs to cancer. Poor Billy.

What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist.

Why didn't Sally go to the party? Because everybody hates her and she wasn't invited.

Man walks into Malaysian Airlines "Hey, can I have the next flight to--" "This is our only policy! You pay the fare we pick the where."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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