A dog walks into a bar. The bartender asks the dog "what will ya have?" The bartender is then recognized as The Dog Whisperer

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the bottom of a pit? Whatever his parents named him.

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Two cows are sitting in a bathtub. One cow says please pass the soap. The other cow says nothing, cause it's a cow, making it incapable if speech. The other cow was just a guy in a cow costume.

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why is yo mamma fat? cause she likes doughnuts

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What is the difference between a peasant and a pheasant? One's a bird.

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a man walks into a bar... he was shot to death because he was a slave during the 1910s

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Q: why did the 10 year old squirt his dad with the water hose? A: what 10 year old WOULDN'T?

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what's the worst part of your kid dying the clean up

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Why did Mark get paralyzed? Because he was a famed football player that went drafted for the 1st pick but was later hit so hard that his spine com pulsed and tore

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what do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? a stick

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Why did the Jewish man stop to pick up a quarter off the filthy street? He saw a homeless man begging on the street corner and thought that he could give him the spare change he found.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because 7 was a sixoffender!

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What do you call a man who walks at your door in a Saturday morning? A jehovah witness.

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WELL YOU ARE ALL A ROOF. So pie, my dearest Adam. Like a butthole.

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If a man is called a manly man, what is a dude called? A dudely dude.

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how many dumbasses does it take to make a kushagra

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IF circles are squares and squares are purple and i dont know what im talking about does that make all potatoes orange?

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lololololololololol

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Whats red and hurts your teeth? A brick

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What's black and white, and red all over? A police car. Well, maybe it's not red all over. Just that little light on top. Oh, and the tail lights.

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Kid walks into principals office Principal: do you know why I called you down here. Kid: yeah, I punched a kid at lunch. Principal: that's not why I called you down here

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Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. I'm not sure, because there are many farmers on this earth, and finding the same one that you are talking about, may be hard. It may take a while, but i'll get back to you as soon as possible, with an anwser.

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Your momma so fat.... She's at risk of cardiovascular disease. You should take her to a nutritionist.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The IRS, please get out of the way.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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