Why did the chicken cross the road---- because he's having financial and relationship related problems that make his life so hideously unbearable that he wants to kill himself and because he's a chicken and cannot overdose or hang himself he goes for the most viable option as to run across a busy street in hopes of getting smashed to oblivion by a car

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Q: How Do You Stop a Bus? A: Pull the Brakes so it comes to a absolute stop.

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A 21 year old man walks into a bar with a vase of 12 roses. 57 years later he died after a lengthy battle with colon cancer.

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What's worse then getting followed by a creepy man in a van? Getting followed and raped by a creepy man in a van.

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How do you make a baby cry? You hit it in the face with a hammer.

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Whats great about F***ing twenty one year olds? There's twenty of them.

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Why is Kony so mean? He used to date your mom.

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What happened to the Jew with a boner that ran into a wall? He broke his nose.

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What do you call a black man with a well paid job? A sucess and a credit to himself and his family

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what did the penguin say to the other penguin after they rolled down a hill, and fell into a pile of leaves then proceeded to go swimming, play basketball, go swimming again and then play ping pong and pool? nothing. penguins cant talk

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What's woman spelled backwards? Sandwich-maker.

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What's the difference between a grape and a duck? They're both purple, apart from the duck.

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Why did the woman cross the road? To welcome the new neighbors.

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A man with Tourette's syndrome walks into a bar. Because of his disease, he shouts unexpected profanities across the room, and everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the humiliation anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom, pulls out a gun, and points it at his head. His wife walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and he notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to make. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. Shocked and afraid, he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentenced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man still suffers from Tourette's and cannot control his ticks and rots in jail. He continues to scream random obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

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What did the cow say to the chicken? - Muuuuhhhhhhhhh!

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Q.why did the car crash? A.becaus eit was drivin by a sack of potatos.

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what did the black guy get from churches chicken? fried chicken.

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Q: Why is there never sun beaming at the castle? A: Because the castle is full of knights.

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Where do bees go to the bathroom? In the hive - they're incontinent.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Santa Santa who? Imwatching you!

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car. -Tag

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because it lacked the requisite musculature to facilitate locomotion

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What do you do If you can't afford a hair cut? Don't get one.

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What's the difference between a joke and an anti-joke? I don't know man, but you touch yourself at night.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops