What's green and runs through the forest? - A pack of cucumbers. What's wrong with that? - Cucumbers aren't pack animals.

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Why Did The Girl Fall Off The Swing. IDK maybe she fell asleep.

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Why did Billy cross the road? Because Billy wasn't wearing his seatbelt.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer lacked basic fence mending skills

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What did the Dog say to the Cat? Nothing, Cats and Dogs are of different species and can therefore not understand one another.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

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Ask me if i'm a fish. Are you a fish? Do I look like a fish?

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What's worse than seeing another antijoke with "The Holocaust" punchline repeated? The Holocaust.

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Q: Ask me how far have you gone with a girl? A: Mexico

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what did you call a downer in the medieval times? spazalot

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One night I went to this pub, they had a big jar full of $10 notes in top of the bar. I asked the bar tender what was that jar for and he told me that they have a donkey around back and if you make it laugh you win the jar. So i went around the back and i come back around 5 mins later and the donkey was laughing its head off. So i grabbed the jar and told the boys lets hit the clubs.Two weeks later i went to the same pub and they had another jar with $10 notesso i asked the bar tender what that jar was for and he goes to me "that donkey has been laughing ever since you left, now we want the donkey to cry" So I asked for a go and went around the back and when i come back the donkey was crying. as i went to go grab my jar but the bar tender stops and asks me how i did it. the first time i came i told the donkey i had a bigger dick then him.. the 2nd time i showed him.

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nicky finds it really hard to get it up.

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"Where's your mom?' "She died last night. . ."

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How do you get pikachu on a bus? You don't pokemon are fictional characters

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what's small, red and sits in the corner? A naughty strawberry.

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Whats worse than a rotten tomato. a fridge hitting your baby.

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Roses are red violets are red I think I'm bleeding It's getting in my eyes

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How do you make a baby float? Take your foot of its head.

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Male orgasm (haha bitches we've been faking it)

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"You know what sucks?" "Vaccuumes?" "You know what metaforically sucks?" "Black holes?" "You know what just isn't cool?" "Lava?"

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Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poems, nice tits

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One of them I can whack with a hammer, the other is a watermelon.

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Why does the pope doesn't use this finger? (raise a finger) That's mine!

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4/20 is a holiday just like Christmas.. I lied you just get baked

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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