Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

The once was a man from Nantucket, Who gave up on his life and said "damn this!" Then he won lots of money, His future looked bright and sunshiny Until one day he suddenly died

Roses are red Tulips are blue Wait, no sorry That's violets.

Two Penn-State Advisors walk into a butt.

An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can’t talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it’s a bird of prey.

Did you hear about the comedian cereal killer?...He raped his victims before strangling them to death.

There are four worms walking in a straight line. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The fourth worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied!

I dumped this chick who was cross eyed. I thought she was seeing other people.

What's a pirates favorite element the periodic table? Gold.

There are two types of people in the world: 1. people who can extrapolate from incomplete data And I have two wonderful pieces of advice: 1. Never tell anyone everything you know

What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? Whatever their names happen to be.

What do you call a sheep with big teeth? Mitch

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

Why did the man not get home to his loving family? He blew up.

What's brown and sticky? a stick

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock Who`s there? Not Suzie

Who needs god when coffee is cheaper

Yo momma so fat she weighs 400 pounds.

Your momma so stupid, she dropped out of school at a young age of 12.

What did the blade of grass say to the other blade of grass? Nothing, as grass does not have the capability of speaking and does not have a brain, all it has is a complex life system where it feeds off water. If it were to say anything though, it would say, "Hey! We're both blades of grass!"

Q: When is the best date to walk out your door in New York? A: 9/11

why did the little girl fall off the swing - she had no arms.

Why cant Stevie Wonder see his friends? Because he is married.

Mel Gibson and a Jew walk into a bar They proceed to have a pleasant conversation and both take taxis home

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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