Yo mama's so fat that she takes too muc oh fuck it I'm stuffed Henri and Chaz

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did a boy drop his ice cream? The Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did Timmy's mom think of his art project? Nothing, she screamed and called an ambulance because she saw that he had tripped and fallin onto a pair of scissors and they just so happened to peirce his heart.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the group of black men do to the old white woman? Gave her back the purse she dropped.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the man loose his balls? he had testicular cancer and had to get them removed.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why couldn't the cow move? It had Cystic Fibrosis.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Who flexes triceps more than anyone? James

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the boy bump into a pole. He was sleep-walking with his eyes closed.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do u call someone who lies? Jack eckert qnd colin

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What is better than one trillion dollars? One trillion and one dollars... duh.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A king's son's birthday was coming up and the king asked,"Son i'm the king. You can have anything you want." And the son said,"Oh i'll have some purple ping pong balls." For his birthday he got a rollar coster, a pizzaria, a new car, and of corse, some purple ping pong balls. The next year the king asked,"Son, i'm the king, you can have anything you want." and the son said,"Oh i'll have some purple ping pong balls." And for his birthday he got a manchin, an iphone, a water park, and of corse some purple ping pong balls. One day, the prince was driving in his car and was in a terrible car accadent. On his death bed, his father asked him one final question,"Son, why did you want all of those purple ping pong balls?" And the son answered,"Well, i wanted all of them because-" and then he died.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

When is homework not homework? When it is turned into the teacher.

thumb_up thumb_down +101

Your family tree is like a cactus, its full of pricks. ;P

thumb_up thumb_down -21

why did oprah, your mother, and a monkey on a rock have in common? the ability to fornicate

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What is long, hard, and full of semen? An erected penis.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what do you call a black chef glendon

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do airplanes and grapes have in common? They both have wings, except a grape doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

roses are red violets are red everything's red i'm colour blind

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A group of 8 paintbal professionals land on an island to battle another paintball team. The team is then faced by a challeng of the other team ambushing them. Everyone is okay and not touched. A case breaks the window of the bus they hide in. They open the case and find a bullet proof vest. A man placed the vest on himself. They made it one by one out of the bus and to the otherside of the field the man with the vest was shot and started going... eghegeheghdjrhherbehgh and they pulled out a real gun bulet. They were now under attack by an enemy with real amunation. Then next man to run across the fied was killed. Tehy ran fr their lives.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Whats worst than the world ending? Charlie Sheen Not Winning

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread!

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the little boy get for Christmas? Nothing. He was Jewish.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why do I know Vin Diesel is gay? Because I sucked his dick

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What's gold and looks like a brick? A gold brick. What's gold and looks like a nugget? A gold nugget. Whats gold and like a car? Gold. I lied about the car.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops