Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: Immobile.

What do a fish and a moose have in common? They both live under water, apart from the moose.

Yo mama's so fat that she should probably go on a diet to avoid the risk of getting a cardiovascular disese.

What's the difference between a soldier and a black man? A black man lives a normal life, probably working a full time job to bring income to his family. A soldier has seen his friends killed right before his very eyes, has probably killed, and most likely has night terrors accompanied by the sounds of gunshots and grenades. He will suffer trauma up until he dies of a heart attack in his mid 80's after experiencing a terrifying flashback of life in the war.

Your mom is so fat, you might be dyslexic

It's raining, its pouring, the old man is snoring. He bumps his head, and is quickly rushed to the ER for serious head trauma

What comes after 69? mouthwash

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, he didn't my car got to him first.

Q: Whats worse than 5,000,000 African Americans being killed? A: 1 White person being killed

a horse walks into a bar the bartender says "why such the long face?" the horse is now crying in tears because the bartender made him. by Brennan pickrell

What do you call a blonde doctor? Doctor

Roses are red Violets are red I'm bleeding quite profusely I should proably go to the hospital

Legal Mexicans in Texas

Why is Osama bin laden so hard to find? Because he is dead.

Why did the black man get a life sentence in prison? Because he was involved a mass stabbing in a night club London which saw 4 local teenage girls lose there lives.

So, I was walking down the street. As i walked past a oak door an entrance to a mental institution, I heard a bored voice going, "eleven, eleven, eleven". My curiosity, like a cat, got better of me and I decided to take a peek through the key hole and see the eleven things being counted. As soon as I had my eye on the key hole, I was poked in the eye by a metal rod. Startled, I feel back to the street. And, sure enough, heard the same bored voice, going, "twelve, twelve, twelve".

What's fat and ginger? My dog.

An Asian with a big dick.

Yup, I mean we use all of your techniques and all things considered the messages end up looking pretty much the same, as if the same person had written them, Azure is named Carlos, and well, he is pretty much a computer wiz so you have nothing to worry about.

PATHETIC

Knock, knock Who's there? The electrician And about bloody time too, you'd better come in.

How many electricians does it take to screw on a light bulb? 1

ADAM FANTUZZI SUCKS KIRANS BALL SACK

A husband and a wife were having a conversation: Woman: Why is the baby on fire? Man: I dont know. Woman: BUY ME SHOES!!!!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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