What do you call someone with the world biggest encyclopedia on their head? Dead.

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Why did the kid lose his mom? She was shot.

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What sounds really bad? An accordion.

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a termite walks into a bar and asks, "wheres the bar tender?"

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What's purple and eats rocks? Scientists are still looking into this question.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms! Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sarah!

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What do you call a woman with one leg shorter than the other? Whatever her name is.

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Life is like a box of chocolates. Well...not really no. It's not.

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Whats the difference between an apple and an orange? A banana because a motorcycle has no windows.

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A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released at a nearby park.

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What word starts with 'f' and ends in 'uck'? Firetruck

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nematode's. A Nematode is a type of round worm that lives under water, and while most are carnivorous, some feed on vegetation, such as pineapples.

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You're so black that other black people make fun of how black you are.

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Black People.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have PTSD. Time to kill myself.

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What did the blind, deaf and mute girl get for christmas? Cancer.

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- How can you call a person, who hasn't got a left eye, a left hand and a left leg? - All right.

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why did the girl cry because she was raped

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What's black and white, and red all over? newspaper...

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What happens, when you give a blonde a Computer? She uses it like any other person because her haircolor has nothing to do with her Intelligence

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Hi my name is Burp -you can call me Bu Nice to meet you

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Q: How do you make a five year cry twice? A: There are many ways, as children are generally not that adept at controlling their emotions. Loud noises, threats of violence, images of scary monsters... those tend to work. Be sure to let them stop crying before making them cry again, otherwise you will have only made them cry once.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a fish.

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2 black guys and a Mexican are in the backseat of a car. Who's driving. The cops

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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