Who ya gonna call? ... Whoever you need to talk to at the current time.

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Wanna hear a clean joke? I took a bath with bubbles. Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is the girl next door.

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Why did the boy jump in the van? Because his parents had just been in a terrible car accident.... There where 2 fatalities.

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how do you wake up lady gaga? scream in her ear.

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i didn't listen to a word you just said but...HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHA

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A man walked into a bar. It was closed, so I don't see how this was possible.

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Why does Eli Manning play for the Giants? Because he is huge.

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What did the Mexican say to the Black guy? Nice to meet you Mr. President. I'm Antonio Villaraigosa, the Mayor of Los Angeles.

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A mexican and a black man are in a car. Who's driving? the black man

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Knock knock. Whos there? Death. You will die in the next 12 hours from terminal cancer.

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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Erectile Dysfunction.

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Ha! You're so gay that I respect the sexuality you were born with and I feel completely comfortable with, and happy for, you and your preferences.

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whats worse than finding half a worm in your apple? being wrongly accussed of a crime you didnt commit because of your race, and being put on death row

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Q: What do Ethiopians eat at night? A: Nothing.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was a depressed alcoholic drug addict whose children had all been diagnosed with a rare form of terminal brain cancer, and he decided to end it then and there by jumping in front of an approaching bus.

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A man walks into a bar. While he sits on a barstool, a man greets him politely, and they proceed with light conversation.

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whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and the holocaust? A pile of dead babies isn't funny

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Republicans

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What's the difference between a baseball player on the Yankees, and one on the Red Sox? One was named Jeff, the other wasn't.

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why did the chicken go to the man? TO ask if he wants sex for money

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What do you call six million jews? Dead.

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So I was standing in line at the grocery store and this little old lady let me cut in front of her. It was neat.

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How did Moses make his tea? He steeped the tea lives for around 5 minutes in hot water.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops