What'd the mexican get for his birthday, birthday cards from his friends and family.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A blind woman walks into a bar... she stands there confused because she is blind and can't tell what going on.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A dyslexic woman wears a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q: What do cooks do for a living? A: Eh muffin.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What is an Indian's favourite country? North Currya

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What do you call children with no arms or legs ...their names

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the man buy a rope? Because he needed a noose

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Vegeta, what does the scouter say about his power level? Vegeta got rid of the scouter because a monocle built for displaying a person's physical abilities in numbers is extremely farfetched and he didn't want to be a part of a super race of supreme beings that still relied on such ridiculous antics

thumb_up thumb_down +33

How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask him to lower the volume a bit and maybe also play a quieter tune.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How do you starve a black man?.........take away his food!!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" Rapist and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

roses are read violets are blue u suck and ur gay

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's half of 8? o

thumb_up thumb_down -29

look at this bag of air it has some chips in it

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why did the little boy fall down the stairs? I pushed 'em.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

why did arno fly away? he was a bird

thumb_up thumb_down +7

why was 7 afraid of 8, cause 8,9,10

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What is worse than a bunch of babies stapled to a tree? A bunch of trees stapled to a baby.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Do you like fishsticks? Ya, me too.

thumb_up thumb_down -60

What's worse than genital warts? Herpes. You can get rid of warts

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Knock Knock Not Yet

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How do you make a Muslim mad? You burn the Quran.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the father tell his son on his death bed? Nothing. He was hit by a car and was now a vegetable.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops