What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Who wants water? I do.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Knock knock, Who's th- IMA FIRIN' MA LAZOR

thumb_up thumb_down +31

A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

whats the difference between a black man and a bench a bench can support a family

thumb_up thumb_down +3

chuck norris won the world series of poker using his superior knowledge of counting cards and calculating probability.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a Muslim on a plane? A passenger, you racist bastard.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

What's green, covered in cookie crumbs, and lies in a ditch? A Girl Scout that was hit by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

how do you kill a black guy ? AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Hello! Echo! My name is Ed!

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Q: What's green and goes round and round and round? A: A baby on a blender

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q:how do confuse courtney A: give her a beer

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Knock Knock Who's there? ... No one, you have Schizophrenia

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What did Osama Bin Laden Say to Obama when they met? Nothing Osama is Dead

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Q: Why was the blonde disappointed with her trip to England? A: She found out Big Ben was only a clock

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Me and my friend wanted to burn some calories so we found a fat kid and lit him on fire!

thumb_up thumb_down -18

what do you call a mothers mothers father's brother's son's uncle's sister's brother's aunt's father's stepbrother's granddaughter's mom? I dont know... im asking you, why are you reading the answers then?

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's the difference between a duck?

thumb_up thumb_down +50

Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. An impossible thing because he can't walk.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

This message is boring. There is no joke. There is no punchline. You can stop reading now.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the chicken cross the road? The bold and unpredictable female bird escaped under the horror of the fearful fence of which enclosed the innocent chickens. As she wandered towards the nearby city of magic and dreams she approached by a large, empty road. A mysterious, shining object in the distant caught her eye. As she slowly to a shivering step towards the intereging sparkle, she was ran over by a car. EPIC FAIL LOL!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

If i could re-arrange the alphabet i'd put my sausage in your oven

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Q: What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? A:One is fun to hit with a hammer, the other is a watermelon.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops