Why was the boy kissing up to his parents? He only wanted them to say "I love you" for once.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the 2nd monkey fall out if the tree? He was stapled to the first Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see, Monkey do.

A blind man walks into a bar. Nobody is surprised.

Knock Knock Whos there? You You Who? Who You Oh im Jim.

Why did the old man go to the retirement home? The 75 year old man had a 45 year career in pluming and he thought it was a good time to retire after saving enough money to be happy and he could spend the rest of his life with his wife. The retirement home was also not that far away from his grandchildren so he liked the location and the home was also very clean and the workers seemed very nice. But this was just a visit to see if he liked it, he may live there soon.

Q: How do you make a black man think you're racist? A: Racism

How did jimmy get hurt?? someone throw a fridge at him..

Why did the man die? He helped others before placing his own oxygen mask on.

A hippie gets on a bus and greets the bus driver in a nice fashion Once the bus stops at his bus stop he thanks the bus driver and gets off the bus

Did you hear about Judith? she was hit by a bus!

Girl 1- why was 6 afraid of 7? dog- ..................................(doesn't say anything because dogs can't ruff)

What did one Japanese man say to the other? I don't know, I don't speak Japanese.

im gey

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because it would be hazardous to other motorists well-being.

A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

What's worse than getting one of your hands cut off? Getting both of your hands cut off.

What is the biggest lie in the entire universe? I agree to the terms of service.

Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

Yo momma's so fat that she's gotta get a special door that will allow her to get through.

How do you get a black person out of a tree? Tell them to come down

roses are red violets are blue i am black and so r u

I slept with a girl with aids and now I do and so does everybody else I have sex with

What's the only part of a vegetable you cant eat? The wheelchair

Despite their parents wishes, two teenagers under the age of 18 tried multiplying. Their answer was 27.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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