What did the framer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What song does a bulimic person sing while on the toilet? Nothing Bulimic people don't poop.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Q:How do u kill a butcher A: Kill its family

thumb_up thumb_down -1

If Chuck Norris were to roundhouse you. Then something previously happened before the altercation, that caused tension.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did that guy die? because the SS thought he was a jew.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

How do you make a baby be quiet when it is crying? slowly choke it to death

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's the difference between a plum and bunny? They're both purple, except the bunny.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Q: Why did the girl fall off the swing? R: Because she had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

Q:What's black and white and red all over? A: An interracial couple in a car crash.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What is the difference between a circle and a cylinder? dunno

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What Mistake Do Ghosts make? None ghosts dont exist..

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Three gay men are in a bath tub and bubbles come up and one says "who farted?"

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the doctor say to the Lawyer? I get paid more

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What's green, covered in cookie crumbs, and lies in a ditch? A Girl Scout that was hit by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A homeless guy walked up to me and said "Any change?", to which I replied, "Nope, your still homeless". We laughed and laughed. The he stabbed me.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call it when a cave man pisses himself running from a t-rex? Historically incorrect.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

How do you get a slave to stop screaming from the rope he is hanging on? You stop messing around and you hang him already!

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Knock Knock Who's there? UPS UPS who? UPS, your package is here.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Read This line it the tune of "If your happy and you know it" If you're reading this, Do your homework. Sincerely, Your Teacher

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Q: Why didn't the man give money to the homeless person on the sidewalk? A: Because he thought that he was faking it. Two days later the homeless person died in an alleyway from starvation. Nobody was there to witness it, and the body was never found.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

roses are red violets are blue count my five damn finger , and the third one is for you!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

-Doctor! Scientists in California have enough proofs to demonstrate that the Christian religion is false. -Oh my God!

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops