What's orange and can fly through walls? A Magic Orange.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

democracy

thumb_up thumb_down +34

This is probably how President Obama proposed to his wife. "I don't wanna be Obama self"

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A cow and a goat are at the top of a hill. The cow starts to eat the grass, and the goat says, "Hey! That's mine!"

thumb_up thumb_down -3

There was a mexican man and a chinese man, They walked into a bomb shop and bought three bombs, then left.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What happens when you walk around with a kick me sign on your back? you get punched in the face. How are you supposed to know it says kick, you cant see your own back.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What is lil Wayne's real name? Dwayne micheal carter jr.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Girl goes to see a sex therapist. Girl says, "Doc, though this has never been a problem, for the past 3 months I have been unable to reach climax. Can you help me?" Doc says, "Yes.". And after an intense 18 months of therapy the doctor helped the girl to discover that her inability to reach climax was related to issues of childhood sexual abuse. And after another 36 months of therapy the girl finally found the courage to confront and forgive her unrepentant abuser, as she realized that by not forgiving him, it was like drinking poison while hoping that he would die. And though the doctor did help her,as he had said, the girl never regained her ability to reach climax again.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Why did the chicken cross the road? Turns out he was needed immediately at a business meeting.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How do you starve a black man? Take away his current food stocks, and means of income.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Every 60 seconds in Africa. A minute passes.

thumb_up thumb_down +72

A Man walks into a bar and orders a scotch. His alcoholism is tearing his family apart

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did Ashley run out of juice in her house? Because she drank it all!

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why didn't the boy respond to the text? His phone had run out of charge.

thumb_up thumb_down +137

Why is moral man a great Cerebrity? you would not get it, its too cerebral... Moral: I SAID LEAVE HIM ALONE PLEAAAAAAAAAASE! BUAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHA!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why didn't the kid eat lunch at school? He wasn't hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down

If you're American outside of the bathroom, then what are you inside the bathroom? An American inside of a bathroom.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What's big and messy? A big mess

thumb_up thumb_down -43

Knock knock: Who's there: Woo: Woo Who: I knew you'd be glad to see me.

thumb_up thumb_down

what's magenta and has 7 legs? nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Two guys were Arguing. (A & B) A. You suck B. If i suck then you choke. A. The only way id choke is if i smelled your stank ass breathe. B. The only way id have stank ass breathe is if i was liking your moms vagina A. The only way my mom's pussy would stank is if you were liking it. B. The only way id be liking your moms pussy is if it were a dick.... Both stare at each other... and walk off awkwardly

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did Chuck Norris say to the man that asked for his autograph? He happily obliged and continued on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? No, but considering there has not been a single man to walk on the moon since 1972, it'd be difficult to generate any kind of revenue on this natural satellite.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

what looks like a bug, lives in larch mount and lives in a mansion? Aodhan Hearty, lied about the mansion... he lives in a web with his buggy family

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops