Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

Yo momma so fat she decided to have lipo suction

What would be the consequence of a terrorist detonating a 500 kT nuclear bomb in Manhattan? A ridiculous question. All enriched uranium in Pakistan is safe and out of reach of terrorists, their govt. has assured. Please ask about realistic scenarios next time.

How do you spell "black" when you writing an african american history essay. B L A C K

i like candy and other things that are edible... please dont thumbs down just cuz this suxxx just put thumbs up and santa claus will haunt u :)

what do you call a cow on a rollercoaster? a very dangerous and unlikely event

what do you call a top thats spining? A spinning top

Why did the man smell like french toast? His wife previously made him a plate of it that he ate before walking out of the house.

ur mum

What is white, wet, sticky, and gets squished out? Glue obviously, wait.... What were you thinking of?

Q: What dosent a Jew and a pizza have in commen? A: The pizza dosent scream when you put it in the oven.

Why couldn't Billy write his own name... ...because he was wearing purple lemonade???

What did the mother get her blonde daughter for her birthday? A flower on her tombstone.

What's the difference between anti jokes and Charlie Sheen? Nothing. Their both stupid

Think about this. I am lying to you right now.

There was a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. They all had different colors of hair.

Why Did Suzie fall of the swing? She has Polio and will die the Next Day

A white guy, a black guy, and a chinese man all walk in to a magic shop, at different times in the day to buy different products.

"Ask me if I'm an orange!" "Are you an orange?" "No."

Knock. Knock. No one is home. Okay.

Why did the chicken cross the road. It's head was cut off and it didn't know where it was

Why was six afraid of seven? 7 is greater than 6. Didn't you learn about number lines in 3rd grade?

Why did the golfer wear two pairs of trousers? To get to the other side.

What did the white man say to the black man? Hi i'm Steve, it's nice to meet you

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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