What happened when the turtle rolled over on his back? It proceeded to die because it couldnt find a way to roll over. An African tribe then decided to make the recently decised turtle into a delicious soup that lasted him and his family three days.

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kill yourself

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Why do people on here submit anti-jokes involving children getting raped or killed? Because the people on this website are sadists. =/

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Wanna hear a joke about a germ? Sorry I don't want to spread it! -LEts Go Mets!

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404 Error: Joke not found

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Why did Martin have to retake his exams? Because Martin is a right royal Dumbass.

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Roses are white Violets are black I'm colorblind That is sad

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What do a cow and a banana have in common? Neither of them is a police officer.

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I haven't made a school shooting joke yet, but the day is young Just like those kids that got shot

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why did the cow die because she ate poisoned apple pie

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life is a barrel of tomatoes...unless you paint them blue.

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The biggest lie ever. "I do" -Kim Kardashian

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What's green, covered in cookie crumbs, and lies in a ditch? A Girl Scout that was hit by a car.

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How do you hide an Elephant? You paint it's toenails pink and put it in a strawberry patch. Have you ever seen an elephant in a strawberry patch.? It must work pretty well then!!

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What did Batman tell Robin before he entered the batmobile? Robin, I had sex with your mother this last Thursday.

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to smash with a hammer and the other one is a watermelon.

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Knock knock whos there punctuation

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Totsie Roll totsie pop? Altough many tests have been done, there still isn't a certain number. There are many variables involved with this question.

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what do you call a fish with no gills? Dead

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why do my feet smell so bad? because i havent washed them for 5 days

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What's got one leg and no eyes? A leg.

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oh my god! what? i heard this joke the other day and it was hilarious. ok, tell me? actually it doesn't matter i can't remember anyway.

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whats the difference between 100 dead babies and a ferrari? the ferrari is not in my garage.

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Why can't the little girl ride a bike? She has Osteoporosis and falling would shatter her bones.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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