Your MUM has aids :D LOL

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Q) What do you get when you cross a brown chicken with a brown cow? A) An abomination

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Have you heard the one about the three tailed salamander that fell off a bridge? I haven't either.

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What is the best place to get watermelons and fried chicken? A Watermelon grove and a popeyes and/or KFC

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A man is sitting at a bar. He stands up and goes over to these bikers playing pool. He then walks over to the bartender and says "I bet you three hundred dollars that I can pee in that bottle over there." The bartender looks at the bottle and sees there is a good five meters between the two. The bartender then agrees. The man takes out his penis and begins to pee. His pee stream goes everywhere on the bar, on the cash register, and espicially on the laughing bartender. It goes everywhere except inside the bottle. The man finishes and zips his pants. He then smiles at the bartender while handing him three hundred dollars. The bartender asks "why are you laughing you lost three hundred dollars?" Which the man replies "See those bikers by the pool table laughing?...I bet them five hundred dollars each that I could pee on your bar, on your cash register, and on your face and you would laugh and be happy." The bartender then reached under his bar and toke out his bat. He then continued to break the mans knees and then perceeded to pee on his bruised and battered face.

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Why the USA support the 'Kony 2012'? For Oil

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Why did the robot cross the road? Because it was a banana.

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why did graeme go to olivias house to do fun things

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what do you call a fat man standing in the middle of the street a fat man

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q: whats fat hairy and always eats mcdonalds a playboy model i lied about everything

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Why did the mexican jump when he heard police sirens? The sirens where very lound and abrupt. Therefore startling this mexican man.

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why did the man walk into the metal pole? because hes blind and suffers from cancer.

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What is worse than stubbing your toe. Being shot

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whats the difference between chuck norris and a normal human being? nothing

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Why did the woman make so many sandwiches? Because she was a mother catering her child's sporting event.

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how did the ant die? i stepped on it

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Why did the black man pick up a bucket of fried chicken? Because it's delicious.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Get in the van.

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How do you offend a black man? Call him a nigger.

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God bless America, and no where else.

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Why did the depressed teenager die? Because he had cancer.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? A blind deer.

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What is the best way to kill Kony? Shoot him in the head.

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What's orange and sounds like a parrot? An orange parrot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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