Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme. This one doesn't.

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what is long,hard and holds semen,a submarine , i spelled seamen wrong

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Whats worse than blue balls? Green Balls.

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what did Barak Obama order at Dunking Donuts. a donut

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every time I stay in the water too long my pp gets all shriverly sometimes can't find it omg that's so weird

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A woman walks into a bar. Guys aren't the only ones walking into bars.

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Why did the overweight black man wake up & then not get out of bed? He was paraplegic.

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Knock Knock whose there YOUR MOM

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A rabbi walks into a bar, in traditional Jewish garb. The bartender takes one look at him and says "Sorry, you'll have to leave". The Jewish gentleman says "Why, don't you serve Jews in here?". The bartender replies "Of course we do, but we just found asbestos in the walls and we're closing for remodeling." The rabbi politely apologizes for making misplaced assumptions about the bartender's place of business.

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What's black, white, and red all over??? A penguin in a blender.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? Poke her face

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What is the difference between a pumpkin and a dead baby? There are thousands of differences between a dead human and the fruit of a pumpkin plant. One of them is that I didn't choke my wife to death with a pumpkin. Another is that pumpkins have a stem.

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Why does the man ignore his wife? Because he is dead.

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Did you hear about the absent minded professor that tried to change the tire on his pickup truck? He forgot to lock the jack and the truck crushed his head like and egg shell.

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What's the difference between a trash can full of dead babies and a Porsche? I don't have a Porsche in my garage.

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Your momma's so fat that she has a body fat percentage of 37 and is clinically overweight.

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why weren't all the jews wiped out in WW2 the gas bill was too expensive

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a black kid goes and gets some cereal and spills some flower on him self and he goes to his grandma and says look grandma i`m white and then she slaps him he goes to his grandpa and says look grandpa i`m white and then he slaps him and then he goes to his mom and then says look mom i`m white and then she slaps him then he goes to his dad and then says dad i`ve been white for 20 minutes and i all ready hate yall nigas

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whats the difference between the same pair of shoes? one shoe is for the left an one if for the right

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Why did the cat cross the road? he wanted to be a docter.

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Why did the black man commit suicide? Because the white man murdered him.

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* two sisters are making yo mam jokes* * mom turns around* mom: Hey yo mama so stupid ... sister one: ummmm.... sister two: sure thats not you?

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How does a doctor wake up in the morning He opens his eyes

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What did the farmer say when the potatoes were ready for harvest? The potatoes are ready for harvest.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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