Every time im sad, I think of a T-Rex trying to put on a hat.

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What stinks and comes out of someones mouth. Bad Breath

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What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Raped

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Did you hear about the blind carpenter who picked up his hammer and saw? Did you hear about the deaf shepherd who gathered his flock and heard (herd)? If you don't understand these, use your dictionary and look up the words "blind," "deaf," "saw," "heard" and "herd." http://gpsphone-tracker.com/

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Why did the man run? Because he was trying to get a gold medal for the 200m at the Olympics.

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"I see" said the blind man to his dead wife

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What can be worst than letting someone you dont know run a chainsaw? Letting Smokey Dokey run a chainsaw!

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Why did Sally cry at the wedding? somebody shot her future husband.

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what did the boy with dyslexia get for his birthday? bad grades

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What did the three sixteen year old boys do to the homeless man late at night? Wished him a happy birthday and gave him a meal

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A bartender walks into a bar. About 8 hours later, he goes home.

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"Why can't you hear pterodactyl when it goes to the bathroom?" "Because the pee is silent?" "No, because they are dead, you idiot."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by Osama.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Quetzalcoatl. Quetzalcoatl who? Quetzalcóatl, Mayan name Kukulcán, (from Nahuatl quetzalli, “tail feather of the quetzal bird [Pharomachrus mocinno],” and coatl, “snake”), the Feathered Serpent, one of the major deities of the ancient Mexican pantheon. Oh... hi.

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Whats the similarity between a bike and a black person? They are both stolen

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I am iron man 24 flavors in my van i am the icecream man i have met jackie chan

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What's worse than being held hostage? Waking up and finding dick your mouth

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite

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Why did the boy make a horribly unfunny anti joke? He was bored.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm Scizophrenic And so am I.

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A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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What is black and blue? A pen with reversable ink.

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why did Helen Keller's dog commit suicide? you would too if your name was uuhuhuhduhh

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How do you get 1,000 dead babies into a car? Blender How do you get them out? Straw

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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