An American and Russian are arguing about their country. The American says "I can do things you can't. I can walk into the White House and into the Oval Office. I can bang my hands on my President's desk and say "Mr. Obama, I don't like the way you're running your country." The Russian says, "I can do that." The American says, "No, you can't." The Russian says, "Sure I can. I can go to Vladimir Putin's office and say "Mr. President, I don't like the way Mr. Obama's running his country."

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Your hat is not on you head. Where is it On you head

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FAP

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Q How is it Going Patty? A:Hi Patrick hows it going?

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Wanna hear a joke? No.

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Why did the baby cross the road? 'cause i kicked it.

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What did the alphabetical soup spell for little Bobby? U gOt SUzie prEgnant ....... aGaiN

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in superbad, why couldnt seth take off mclovin's face and wear it as his own? no one can. theyre fictional characters in a movie

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A man walks into a bar gets drunk gets in his car and has a terrible crash because he was to intoxicated the end.

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A black man, an Asian man, and a Mexican man jump off a bridge. They were all suffering from chronic depression and couldn't take the pressures of life anymore.

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- Knock, knock. -- How many dead babies does it take to cross the street and walk into a bar? - That's an odd question to ask to a visitor. -- Your mom.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It probably saw an animal that it wanted to chase, or a person carrying food, or another dog that it wanted to make friends with.

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What do you call a bay that got run over by a train? Thomas

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What's the difference between me and a dead baby? I'm not dead, or a baby. I am well into my teens and very healthy.

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What is green, walks on four legs, and is capable of the strongest bite in the world? An alligator.

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a man sees a monkey playing the drums at first he thought it waz the guy in the monkey suit that plays the drums but on closer inspection he sees that it is in fact a real monkey on that note he tries to befriend the monkey but the monkey soon tore the man into pieces

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Q: What's funnier than a baby in a blender? A: A baby in a clownsuit in a blender.

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A Jew was walking home one night when two thugs leapt out of the darkness and demanded his money and other possessions at gunpoint. A reflection of how dangerous our streets can be at night.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Black guy. Due to your skin tone I feel you may cause potential danger to me and my family, so for that reason I will not allow you to enter my home.

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Why was 6 afraid of seven? seven commited statitory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8, murdered nine, was sent to jail for life, let out early for community service, and told 6 he was coming forhim 6 months later.... 6 commited suicide by jumping off a cliff his body was never found his family didnt get to say good bye thats why 6 is afraid of 7

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what happened to the little kid on a bicycle? Nothing

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What's worse than pushing a baby off a cliff?........ Standing at the bottom with a pitchfork....!

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Why did the little boy drop his Icecream? Because I ran him over with my Bus!!

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Why are black people so good at sports? Because there black.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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