I had a terrible childhood. My mom abandoned me before I was born.

For New Years I want to spend more time with my... Video Games

'Knock knock' 'who's there?' 'Whinny the poo' 'Whinny the poo who?' 'Whinny the poo'

What happened when the Mexican lays his head on a pillow? He falls asleep

A man gets a new job working for his boss. The boss gives him more and more work and less pay. The man finely gets fed up, beats his boss in a fight, quits his job, and starts his own business. Historians later speculated that the man's life would serve as a perfect national allegory for the USA.

CAUSE IT'S ONE, TWO, THREE STRIKES YOU'RE OUT

Why did the chicken cross the road? Your mom.

roses are red violets are blue I have five fingers and the middle one is for u

Why are soccer players sad? They couldn't play Football.

What's the difference between a red Ferrari and a pile of deal babies? The red Ferrari is not in my garage right now.

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Why w\s the English man, the French man, the German man, the Indian man, the Chinese man, the Irish man, the American man and the russian man all on a train together? They where going to the olympics.

What is a dinosaurs favorite chips? Doritos.

If you were in a room with Osama bin Laden, Hitler, and a black guy and you had two bullets, who would you shoot? Personally, I'm a peaceful person. I'd let Hitler figure it out.

women's rights

Yo sugars so salty when you put it on your french fries they taste like salty french fries

What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A black man is a human, with feelings, living cells and a loving and devoted family, while a park bench is made from wood and metal and used purely for people to sit on. In parks.

Q: What did the magician do to cure his cold?? A: Took medicine!

A black guy moves in to your neighborhood. The housing values plummet due to the current economic recession.

What's worse than eating a baby? Eating two babies filled with maggots.

Whats worse than getting shot? Getting shot twice.

Person 1: It's your birthday? Person 2: Yeah! Person 1: Oh.

how do you get a blue waffle? paint your vagina blue

How many fingers do u have? 11 Start with left pinky count 10,9,8,7,6 then 6+5=11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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