How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Set a firework off on her face.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.....

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Why does the little boy play video games all the time? Because he is socially awkward and has no friends.

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What did the boy who got picked on everyday do? He took the bullies advice and killed himself.

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What's big and white?

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"Did you eat your veggies?" asked the shark, sarcastically.

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Why was Timmy crying? because his impaled his dog while in a drunken rage

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Immediately following his inauguration, Bush called Obama into the oval office for a private meeting and some words of advice. Bush and Obama shook hands as gentlemen do and then Bush asked if Obama wanted to hear a joke. Obama eagerly said yes, "Good..." Bush said, handing Obama a battered copy of the United States Constitution, "...the joke is in your hands", and with that Bush turned and left.

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Knock Knock Who's there? You have AIDS

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What's the difference between a Elephant? It can neither bike...

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a black is sexuel but a white nothin without a car.i mean im nothin i dont have a car i mean realy where do you get a car?its awesome but stupid.

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where do you find a dog with no legs? Korea. It's customary for the guests to get the drumsticks.

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what did the white singer say to the black rapper? I would like to do a song with you seeing as how we have 2 separate audience types i believe this would prove the song to be successful

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What's Black,White and red all over? A black person with a skin disease on her period.

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What'd the Jew get for Christmas? Nothing. He's Jewish, remember?

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Whats big, white, and will kill you if it falls out of a pine tree? A refrigerator

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My grandmother just called to tell me she was dying................. to have sex with me.

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whats worse than finding a dead cat in your kitchen? a dead cat in your bedroom

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Q : Why did the girl fall off the swimset ? A : Gravity pulls smaller masses towards larger masses, so the girl being the smaller mass, got attracted to the bigger mass, AKA the Earth, and that's why she fell.

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Donald trump walks into the whitehouse. He's there for a business meeting with the new president.

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So my wife was in the kitchen, and I asked her to make me a sandwich. She agreed. I then volunteered to make her one. Lesbian relationships are amazing.

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They say under Chuck Norris's beard, is just a chin.

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How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay is irrelevant.

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Why did Harry go to the store? He was out of food.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops