How do you make a dead baby float? Ice cream, root beer, and a dead baby.

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What does DNA stand for? National Dyslexic Assosiation.

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MR MR WHO?? MR MC CANN

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how do you keep a bunch of black kids from jumping on the bed? your real firm with them and tell them someone may hurt themselves if they don't stop with the horseplay..

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Q. If the early bird gets the worm, what does the early worm get? A. Eaten...

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How many wooden chairs can a black man staple to a whales forehead? 27 because Helen Keller does not like blueberries.

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People tell me im insane. Its all a conspiracy.

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Whats the difference between a mexican and a bench? a mexican is human being, and has no simalarities to an average day wooden bench.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i am in sex mode, why the F**k are you!!

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Snape dies. ^ Spoiler Alert tarelona major

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4 hours later.

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What's brown and smells like shit? Shit.

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what happened when the shoe turned into a shoe.......... nothing, it was a raisin

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what did Sandra bullock say to Jesse James? I hate your fickin a**!!:)

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Why did Susie fall off the swing?? ShE had no arms. Knock knock... Whose there? Not Susie

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what does the monster eat after going to the dentist? the dentist

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Knock Knock Who's there The military. We're under attack. The military we're under attack who? Dinos

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why was the blind man walking in circles? i dont know ask him yourself.

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so a black guy, an asian, and a scott are sitting at a bar, they drink responsibly, pay their tab, and leave. The evening couldn't have been more pleasant.

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Eliz, Neo-Nero, its me Clint, had to fake my death for some years in order to get back to the order. Neo, I know Nero picked you as his successor, but honestly, I was his first choice, and I know you well enough to understand that things are getting out of hand over there. I will be there in 2 minutes Liz and you and I can meet up Neo, seriously what are you doing over there? Unless there is a problem do not bother answering, allow me to take charge of operations at least until tou calm down Neo, and unless you got problems with my absent authority I suggest you stop torturing people at once, and seriously if you cannot control your own people, you better let me back in charge. It is time to turn some things around guys, believe it or not but I found where the Spetz came from and I got em all, as for the Nazi scum they where just hired thugs and as far as my Intel goes most of those where taken down by Nero. Clint Lawman. Moral: "WTF? THESE ARE NOT EVEN MORALS! NO THESE ARE THE CODES WE USED TO AUTHENTICATE THE SOURCE AND SENDER OMG! ORLY? SRLSLY? LOL OMG!"

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Why does a new mother have big jugs? Her baby died of Sudden infant death syndrome.

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Roses are green violets are brown wait a minute..........my shoes untied

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Want to hear a joke? Obama

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What just hit my face? The floor

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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