Why did the chicken cross the road the chicken is blind and deaf and happened to wander into the street and got hit by a car and was instantly killed

When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he does it the same way everybody else does.

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? No one, because a hollowed out pineapple carcass would not be able to last longer than a month in that high concentration of sodium.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

Bob: Do you know the difference between beer and women? John: No Bob: Oh

What's green and blue that is shaped like the earth? The earth

So I was flirting with a girl at a bar the other day when this huge black guy walks up and says "Hey honey". I realized that I still had some un-addressed prejudices in me as he shook my hand, pointed out that it was a mistake anyone could make, and introduced me to a girl he had met at the college he works at.

So one day a man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him what he would like to drink. He said he would like a glass of water. The bartender said "why come all the way to a bar just to get some water." The man responded "well its a longer walk to the coffee shop."

Dance is a sport

black people

Q. Why were the children sad? A. They'd just been abducted by a dodgy old man in a van.

What's 1+1? 4.

How do you know when an Asian has robbed your house? You have informed the police, who in turn searched the house for DNA evidence, eventually leading them to the criminal, who just so happened to be a troubled Asian teenager attempting to join a local gang.

So I says to the guy "take the money and run." He then takes my money and walks down the street.

What do I smell like to you?? Crap.

A young boy is concerned about the well- being of his father, due to the fact he may have cancer. Turns out, he doesn't. So they got ice cream.

What do gay horses eat? Horse dick.

What's the square root of 69 Jimmy? Square root of 69 is 8 something right? Cus I've been trying to work it out oh. Jimmy! It's 8.306623863 >.

How do you crash an airplane? By not knowing how to fly it.

Q) What's worse than getting dumped by text? A) Getting hit by a fridge.

What do u call a ginger man with no ears? What ever the hell u want Because he's deaf

A blonde, redhead, and a brunette are chatting outside a casino. The brunette directs a joke towards the blonde. "What's the difference between cotton candy and pork chops?" The blonde has heard the joke prior to this encounter and correctly completes it with sign language because she is deaf.

Yo mamma's handwriting is so bad that its barely legible to most people!

Do you know what's the sexiest thing in the world? Sex.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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