What's under there? I'm not falling for that one...

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You have never had sex because.... Well, look in the mirror and you'll see for yourself -Matt

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Nero I know I am being a selffish bastard, but please let me speak with you for ten more minutes or so, I am sorry but its like part of me do not believe its you, we all saw your corpse, attended your funeral, please stick with me, I just feel flustered vulnerable and stupid.

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A schizophrenic man walks into a bar. He has split personalities and does not realize that he has murdered his family.

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Why did the loser end up in hospital? Because he was smoking glue.

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Patient: "So what seems to be the problem doc? Doctor: "I'm afraid you have AIDS. I'm sorry."

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Chuck Norris walks into a bar. Everybody leaves except Michael Jackson. Michael Jackson never walked out alive

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Timmy: "Dear Santa, why don't you ever come to my house?" Santa: "Because you don't have parents, Timmy" THE END

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i keep getting thumbs down...

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why did the boy stay home from school? it was saturday

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What do you call a retarded sheep? Whatever it's name is. There's no sense in torturing it by pointing out the disability which has made it a social outcast it's whole life.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house No Neither has he.

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one of my best friends is blind and hasn't been able to see anything hhis entire life but he can hear a hummingbird from 50 yards away i mean, talk about worthless..

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What did casey anthony say when the ruled her as not guilty? "yay"

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What has a bomb straped to itself and has wheels? Me. I lied about the wheels.

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What did the cat say to the dog? Meow

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A man walks into a bar and poops his pants. He left because of the embarrassment.

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How do you kill a cancer patient? Throw a fridge at him.

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Why was the man scared? Because he was being attacked by a giant tiger.

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What's the difference between a model and a baby? I didn't have sex with a model last night.

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Hey, what’s your problem? I’m a Catholic whore currently enjoying congress out of wedlock with my black, Jewish boyfriend who works in a military abortion clinic. So, hail Satan, and have a lovely afternoon, madam. a.w. j.p.

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Do you know what God said to Hitler as he approached the gate of heaven? ??????????????????

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LPFTeHEsAS4 You will not be disappointed.

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If your riding your bicycle down the railroad tracks and your wings fall off how much icecrea does it take to fill a upside down doghouse

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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