What do you call cat that is on fire? Nigel.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the blonde stare at the juice carton? Because a man was pointing a shotgun at her and would kill her if she didn't do it.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Conner Schmidt's fiance has the fattest ass in the world <3

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Throw your crépe right into an ocean Where an octopus can get it in all the commotion With the crépe and the ocean and the oc-to-pus

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Pick up Lines skeet skeet skeet! JLR

thumb_up thumb_down +10

If you place a dog next to a cow, they're not the same size

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what's better than being stabbed in the testicles with a biro? the Silversun Pickup's album Neck of the Woods

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A Muslim walks into a bar. BOOM

thumb_up thumb_down +50

Why did sally fall off the swings? Because she had no arms. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Sally

thumb_up thumb_down +28

You are in a sealed room with Joseph Stalin, Osama bin Laden, and Hitler and have a revolver with two bullets. Who do you shoot? None of them. You awkwardly set the gun down and wonder how to get out of this room filled with three corpses.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why don't mummies take vacations? They're dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Whats worse than 2 babies in a trashcan. 1 baby in 2 trashcans

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He threw it, because he had parkinson's!

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Matthew Baker

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A man walks into the doctor's office and says "I'm not feeling to good doc." and the doctor says "Thats because you have a fatal brain tumor and probably don't have too long to live."

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What rhymes with you? You.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

knock knock! who's there? a fat salesperson here to deliver your supplements

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Yo' mamas so fat that your friend said a yo mama so fat joke to you. You were certainly not amused.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Your moms so fat she weighs 200 kilograms

thumb_up thumb_down -1

ALCATRAZ IS REOPENED!

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Do you know what it looks like when you put a cat in the microwave for 3 minutes? I don't know either because I close my eyes when I masturbate.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Q. Why did the boy throw up on the bus? A. All his friends around him died in the accident

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why couldn't little sally swim? Because she had weights on her ankles.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops