Tell somebody that someone told you they look like an owl. When they say "Who?" laugh in their face

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Given the unlikely circumstance in which an elephant actually does sit on your fence, it is equally unlikely said elephant would be able to do so unseen by witnesses, of whom you may ask what time the event occurred. Assuming your witness thought to look at the time befor calling animal control.

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What do you call a donkey walking backwards a confused donkey

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why did the girl go into the kitcen? she was preparing a meal for her well safisticated family which had not ate dinner yet that day.

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Yo mama is so ugly, she entered an ugly contest and placed well in her division.

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How do you confuse a blonde? put her in a circular room and tell her to stand in the corner

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What do you call a man who is dirty, and is searching through a pile of garbage? A man who threw out his divorce papers.

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Knock knock. Who's there? AV. AV who? Asshole vison. Now that's Amusement Vision. (Remembering Amusement Vision...)

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i just want thumbs up so i feel better about myself.....

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What kind of a prediction is THAT?

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What did the rock say to the other rock? Nothing they're rocks? What did the tree say to the other tree? Nothing they're both trees? What did the pillow say to the other pillow? Nothing they're both pillows? What did the cat say to the other cat? Meow.

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What Sound does a baby make in a blender? I don't know I'm to busy masturbating to it

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When is a joke funny? When you read it.

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No deal, blind trust and I help you, or no friendship, and certainly no reason to help you.

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How do you sink a Polish battleship? You breach the hull.

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I came.

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4 score and 7 years ago was 1965

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Cornelius went to the dcotor and got a sticker and a lollipop for being a good patient. He later went home and shoved the lollipop stick up his dick hole and started wildly masturbating. I forgot to mention Cornelius was 42 years old.

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Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew? Jews are people

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What do you get when a sister and a brother have sex? A deformed child.

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Roses are red, Violets are green, get in my bed, if you know what I mean.

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What happens if you drop an yellow shirt into the Red Sea? It gets wet.

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How do you suppress a black hole? Surround it with white holes

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pizzano is a tool.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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