Barack Obama, Joe Biden, and the Devil all walk into a bar. Biden and Obama order a couple of beers and begin quietly conversing, while their security detail stands next to them. "The Devil" is actually a heavily tattooed performance artist, who in 1999 legally changed his name from Jim Larson. He has just gotten off work at his day job (a paralegal at a medium-sized firm), and is relaxing with a Johnnie Walker at the bar. Although he notices the president and vice president nearby, he has seen many politicians during his time working in DC, and so hardly pays attention.

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WNBA

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Have you heard any anti-jokes? ... Are you Jewish by chance?

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Your momma's so stupid that she was declared mentally retarded by her doctors.

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Q:How did the blonde commit suicide? A: She didn't, she sought help and was able to live a very happy life with a beautiful family in a nice suburb outside of Cincinnati.

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? Because he has no arms.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it has a serious crack addiction and there was a drug dealer on the other side.

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What's the difference between a car and 10 dead babies? I don't have 10 dead babies in my garage.

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He do you get an emo kid to stop cutting himself? Take away his knife.

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What did the fat girl say to the good looking guy? Nothing. She didn't have the self-confidence to go up to him.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was forced to against his will by a group of marauding ninjas who happened to be strolling by at the time.

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A pirate walks into a bar. The bartender says, "You know, you have a steering wheel down your pants?" The pirate says, "I know, I was just raped by a group of men who thought it would be funny to humiliate me as much as possible. The bartender then called 911 seeing that a horrible crime had just been committed.

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Whats better than winning gold at the special olympics? Not being retarded

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I road a horse to school. My friend stabbed it with a Javelin and screamed.... The horse was his Dad

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How do you know if it's to late to turn your homework in? When the time allotted is up.

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What do you call an indian driving a plane? A pilot.

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Why couldn't the mexican buy a boat? Because he couldn't afford it

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Pete and Repete are sitting on a fence. Pete falls off. Pete suffers from a scraped knee and a bruised tailbone.

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Sit on Santas lap Boner

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Guy 1: What is long, hard and full of semen? Guy 2: A submarine. Guy 1: No, my penis.

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babe whos moaning? are you with another woman? guy:god damn if you would stay in the kitchen we would never have any problems.

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what's funnier than hell? heaven

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A guy walks into a restaurant.... He ordered his meal , got desert and left a nice tip based off a percentage of his final bill.

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Q: why did the guys neck hurt after the car crash A: he had a sun burn

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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