How do you keep a black man from robbing your house? Lock your doors, or perhaps get a update-to-date security system.

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Your mother is so ugly that I removed her from my friends list on Facebook.

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Just aids, and gonnoreah, and... Jk, I wont type it here, and I am not "suffering" from nothing, its a condition, it can be a struggle, and yeah it could turn fatal, on the bright side its not contagious (its genetics, flawed genetics) but on the bright side, so far chances are greater of me dying from a giant meteor falling on me as I sleep, than from this... Not disease, genetic flaw, take it from a guy that was born without toenails, has two eardrums and some weird tiny holes on his ears (I can send you a pic of those tiny weird holes, they are not weird, kinda cute I been told and can say so myself) so you calm yet?

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Want to hear the best joke ever? Want to hear it again?

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agp

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Knock knock. Who's there? Fred. Hello Fred.

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A wild Snorlax appeared crushing several members of the community

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What starts with a 'D' and ends with 'ick' Daniel and Jimmy are walking in the park when suddenly they get hit by a stick because a mysterious person threw the stick.

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why did the chef go to jail? because he was caught beating an egg

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How do u save someone from dieing of cancer? U shoot them in the head

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An English man, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They each buy a pint and talk about their day.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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What do you call a black man who goes to college? A scholar.

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Knock,knock whose there? The pizza delivery guy the pizza delivery guy who the pizza delivery guy who didnt give you your pizza

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Why are black people good at basketball? They practice

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I met a man today. His name was John.

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How do you know when there's a terrorist in an airport? There's a camel in the parking lot.

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What did one wardrobe say to another wardrobe? Clothes.

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What did the rainbow sun say to the flower-faced elephant? "Want some tea and hamsters?" I'm addicted to acid.

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Why couldn't the orphans go on the field trip? Their parents couldn't sign the permission slip.

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Hey man how was your trip? great!!! It blew my mind

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A boy was crying. He had been abused and beaten by his parents, and thrown in his room. He was devastated, and wanted to kill himself. He tossed and turned in bed, and moaned himself to sleep. When he awoke, he felt a chill up his spine, noticing that all of his blankets had been torn off of his bed, leaving only him and his mattress. He open the window, and jumped out of his three story building. Luckily, his bedroom was on the first floor. He ran away, and found a rich family that loved him so much until a week later, a murderer came and killed everyone, including him.

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Where do you find your quadriplegic dog? Right where you left it.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? I don't fucking know.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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