Knock Knock Whos there Who Yan Who Yan Who Chow Yan Chow

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Once I asked a Chinese girl , how do I look ? . She said you Europeans all look the same .

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Q: What's a pirate's favorite letter of the alphabet? A: "E"

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the cat say to the cat? Miau

thumb_up thumb_down -6

If life hands you lemons you're probably hallucinating

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did little Timmy get absolutely nothing for Christmas? He is Jewish.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What's the difference between and Jew and a boy scout? The boy scout returned from camp.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Two Jewish Rabbis are sitting in a sandbox....

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: How does a chicken get to work? A: A chicken does not go to work. Chickens can not legally be employed for any position in any country as they are chickens, are not human, and do not posses any prerequisites required to be hired for any existing employable position.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

why was the spoiled girl running from her parents? because they weren't her parents, they were kidnappers and were going to sell her into underground sex trafficking markets where she would probably spend the rest of her life being a slave.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

what do you call a guy that has a mouth, but cannot speak? a poor freshman who has been commanded by a Senior not to speak.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

what do you call a man with no arms and no legs? Bob

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q: what do polo bears have for lunch A: iceburger

thumb_up thumb_down +11

why was the black mans shirt ripped? because he escaped genocide in africa

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the man say to his wife at the funeral. Nothing, he was dead

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why couldn't the old lady take her Afghan Hound to the vet after the dog had been brutally harassed? She was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it was hit by a car

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Q: Who followed E.T.A Hoffman? A: ASAP Rocky. (ETA and ASAP are both time-based abbreviations, ETA meaning 'estimated time of arrival' and ASAP meaning 'as soon as possible'. Thus, ASAP can form a response to a requested ETA. Additional humour comes from the dissonant occupations of the two individuals: E.T.A Hoffman being a nineteenth century gothic author, and ASAP Rocky being a modern rapper.)

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the Queen of England say when here servant died? Another one bites the dust!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A nhiger walked up to a lemonade stand and he said to the man running the stand. "do you have any lemonade" the man said "no. we don't serve nhigers lemonade. but you can drink your own piss boy, thats home made.." the nhiger waddled away (waddle waddle) till the very next day. The nhiger walked up to the lemonade stand with a lawsuit file right in his hand and said "you are legally required to serve me lemonade" the man said "fu(k you nhiger go back to where you came go back to Africa it's full of aids" the nhiger said "goodbye".... i'm too lazy too finish this off so i'll spoil the ending, the nhiger was actually a smelly pakistanian, which was actually a dirty chi-nk in costume. let's just say lawsuits were filed but the lemonade stand owner had casey anthony's lawyer and in the end never had to serve fu-cking nhiger ,smelly pakies or dirty chin-ks again :) The End. Happily Ever After.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Whats more sad then four black men in a car driving off a cliff? The man they stolen the car from doesn't have car insurance.

thumb_up thumb_down

A chicken met a chicken, And they were chickens two, Two chickens met two chickens, And they were chickens too. Four chickens met a boiling pot And they were chicken stew.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops