A rabbi walks into a bar mitzwa.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have multiple personalities So do I

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No one walks into a bar The bar is slowly losing business and will soon be forclosed upon and will also lose his home as a result causing his family and himself to be homeless and slowly suffer on the streets

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What happens when you get your leg caught in an elevator door? Nothing. It is likely that the elevator has advanced sensory components that won't allow the door to close on your leg.

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What do you call a man that was decapitated by a stray saw blade? An ambulance until when you have a reality check and realize that in the mass hysteria of witnessing such a horrific event that this man is already dead. You then callan undertaker, his family and his friends to attend his funeral in a week or so. You then walk over to him and cry.

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What did Jeff say to the guy who stole his car? Can I have my car back.

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Roses are red, violets are blue if God makes us beautiful, Who made you?

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On Tuesday mornings at 7:32 a.m., what is the square root of 31? I don't know, because it would be an irrational number of which is not possible to calculate without the aid of a calculator. However, the date and time would not affect the answer.

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Welcome to die!

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and and no legs in front of a door? A: A quadruple amputee.

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What killed the cat? Feline Leukemia

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Why is a jewish man so tall? Genetics

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When does George Harrison take a shit? In the morning

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why did the titanic sink, it was hit by a iceberg

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Friends are like snow; they disappear when you pee on them.

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Why couldn't the pirate get into the movie? Because he was armed and clearly inebriated.

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Women's rights.

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Why did the car stop. someone threw a cow at it.

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How do you know when your dog is gay? When the dog starts wearing way to many Deep Vs and watches the Oxygen channel with "friends"

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What do you get when Chuck Norris meets Chuck Norris? A bad joke.

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What's worse than crying over spilt milk? The Holocaust.

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Check this web out www.hurr-durr.com

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POO IS LARGE WHEN IT COMES OUT OF ME

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What did the Triceratops get for his birthday? Nothing. Dinosaurs are extinct.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops