Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Sickman Fraud, cocaine snorting alshole... "Oh yeah mommy I love raping you so much... What where are you? This cocaine is really bad quality man! The effect was so short..." Your friendly r*pist neighborhood Moral Man: "Because since when do you really need cocaine... ...In order to rape your mother?"

thumb_up thumb_down -31

why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. Why did the man get a check in the mail every month? Cause he's black Why did Obama Cross the road? Cause he lost control of congress why is there all this blank space?

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How do you kill a politician? You set him on fire and stab him in the back 20 times.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

The WNBA

thumb_up thumb_down +42

how much fish could a chicken

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Roses are red Violets are blue I have altzhiemers Cheese on toast.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

I am the sun. You are the moon.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A fully grown cow walks into a man's house and says to him, "Hey, how have you been?" Traumatized by the vivid circumstances, the man falls to the floor and begins sobbing relentlessly until he passes out onto the floor from a violent mental breakdown.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

-Whats this? -Anti-Jokes.. -Theyre not funny

thumb_up thumb_down -8

how long does it take for a black woman to poop? women dont poop, especially not halle berry

thumb_up thumb_down +33

what did the woman say when the guy told her he liked her christmas tree? thank you.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the asian man crash? He fell asleep after a long 18 hour day of driving, plus he was listening to soothing soul music.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why couldn't the boy sing? The boy could sing, but the thick layer of duct tape prevented him from doing so.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Sam slept and never woke up again.. Because he followed his dream.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

yuor momma so fat she has type 2 diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Stalin and Hitler went to Kmart to buy mini-toothpaste. Because they schleifen schlafanned on their way to the country club.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why can't Tommy the T-Rex clap? Because dinosaurs have been extinct for 65 Million years.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's the quickest way to a man's heart? A knife.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

whats the differences between an atari and a xbox 360 i don't know i'm not a video game nerd

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock Who's there Not Sarah

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Knock Knock Who's there? Do you have a minute to talk about our lord and savior Jesus Christ?

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What can't think, see, hear, taste, or smell? A Headless Cat

thumb_up thumb_down +139

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops