How many rich men does it take to screw in a light bulb? One, to hire an electrician to do it for him.

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What's funnier than 24? NOTHING!!!

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What starts with p and ends in orn? Popcorn

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Q- what did the magician say after the sawed the woman in half ? A- call an ambulance !

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What do you call a dinosaur eating a taco? Nothing, you are high.

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A man walks into a bar. He proceeds to get intoxicated and then commits a felony.

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A Black and a Mexican are in the back of a car, they are carpooling to save money on gas.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was being dragged by a truck

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why did nick kiss esther because he cheated

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Whats the difference between chris and a party. the locations

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knock knock. who's there? ya ya who? dot com

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What do you call a blond british girl a blond britishngirl

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What did the dad say when the irresponsible goth problem child asked for a gun Yes

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Why did the little kid color outside the lines? He had Parkinson's Disease.

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Whats the difference between a truck full of dead babies and a truck full of bowling balls? You can't pick up the bowling balls with a pitchfork.

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What did the politician say to the bank robber? "Were both robbers"

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have trouble understanding each other.

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On a deserted island in the middle of nowhere three women have just been in a horrible boat wreck. They are okay and alive. One is a lovely smart brunette. An appealing ginger. And a blond.. named Becky. They take shelter when one of them notices a shimmer in the sand. They pick it up to discover that it was a golden lamp. They rub it and a blue cloud of smoke consumes them. Then a magnificent Guinnie appears and says "You have awoken me from my 10,000 year encasement inside that lamp! I shall grant you 3 wishes to show you my sincere gratitude." The brunette wishes for a plane so she can fly home. The ginger wishes for a boat to sail back home. The blonde was lonely so she wished that the brunette and the ginger were back with her.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Blind.

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I am aware that my positivity makes me do some bad mistakes, but if negativity is the alternative I will keep taking my chances.

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a mexican and a black guy are sitting in a car, who's driving? the police

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Whats green, furry and it stole christmas? A Robber with a Christmas tree on his back

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Why did the boy have cable? I don't know.

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Why did the boy not wake up on time for school? He was fucking dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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