Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

What do you call something thats mostly made of wood, big, round and stupid A retarded version of the Knights of the round table

Why couldn't the black man be an astronaut? He was not qualified for the Job

White guy: I figure she's a gold digger, my neighbor. Black guy: Did you say the N word?

Like this joke

A squirrel and an owl are sitting in a tree. The squirrel turns to the owl and says nothing, because it is a squirrel and squirrels can't talk. The owl turns to the squirrel and eats it, because it is a bird of prey.

A man walks in to a bar, the bartender asks "what will it be?" The man says i don't know, what will it be?"

-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Dave. -Dave who? -Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

So a crippled guy rolls into a bar..

I worship you Nero, and I wont even begin to explain myself why.

69

Q:Why did the bunny run up the hill? A:Because he can't run under it.

What do lazy asses get for Christmas? Fat

Sean Nuneviller look him up, he's cute.

What do you get when you cross a rainbow with a unicorn, baby, helmet, a bag of sugar, some watermelons, and a jewish guy's hair? A rainbow unicorn baby helmet with a bag of sugar and some watermelons. and some jewish guy's hair.

What do you call 5 black guys at the bottom of the ocean? scuba divers

what do you give a little girl with no arms no legs and who lives in a orfanidge for christmas?.................................... nothing because no parent wants a freak kid

What's black and white and red all over A bloody penguin

A jumpercable walks in the bar the bartender says ill get you something but dont start anything.

Knock knock Whos there? No one, your wife was just in a fatal car accident and died on the scene, so your kids had to walk home from school instead of being picked up. Your son Scotty was grabbed by the sexual predator 4 blocks from the school, and your daughter Sally tried to run and is now under the wheels on the bus going round and round.

Knock knock Whos there Bill O hey bill

What do you get when a man farts then a giraffe digests the gas and then poops into the mouth of a rabid baby raccoon? A raisin coated in corn flakes with digestive fluid sauce.

How do you fit an elephant inside your car? I don't understand why this task would even need to be performed. I have never arrived anywhere in my car and thought "Sure could use an elephant right about now..."

Q : What is the similarity between me and my friend? A : We both are crazy

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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