How do you get rid of door knocker? You run at them with a chainsaw.

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Whats worse than breaking your pencil? Getting a cactus shoved up your ass.

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Biggest lie in America: Sorry, that was my last stick of gum.

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Q: Why didn't Dwight D. Eisenhower play with the silly putty? A: Because he's dead.

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What kind of pizza did the world trade center order? Two cheese pizzas.

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A guy walks into a bar. He order three drinks and hands them to the lady behind him. It's because she is an alcoholic.

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whats the difference between a chicken and a rooster. a rooster has a dick

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How many Mexicans does it take to change a light bulb? Probably just one.

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Hey, did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? No He didn't either.

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What did the dog say to the human? Nothing really. Dogs technically "speak" through barking.

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When someone calls me ugly, I run up and hug them, because I know how tough life is for the visually impaired.

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What is a cow's favorite drink? Well, I could be wrong and this is just my opinion, but I do not believe that animals experience feelings and, in corollary, favoritism towards anything, particularly regarding basic survival needs, such as hydration.

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Why did the Mr. bunny play the piano? - His wife Lannette was ill, and her last wish before she died was for him to.

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Doctor everybody that I stare at seems to die moments later! Uh, why are you looking at me so intensely... >:)

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Your mama's so stupid she brought syrup to the quidditch world cup because she heard there would be quaffles!

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why did the chicken cross the road. why? because he felt like it

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What do you do when your baby won't stop crying. Slit its throat

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Robin get in the batmobile!

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Why doesn't superman eat peanuts? Because he doesn't like them.

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while in iraq i bought a brand new iphone from the black market...it was only $250....its was doing fantastic until i got a text...i herd a loud beeping noise and the it exploded in my pocket and now i no longer have a penis.

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A sad-looking man entered a bar. The barman asked, "why so sad?" The man replied, "I have a terminal illness."

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Yo mama so stupid, she waited for the stop sign to say go

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Yo mamma is so dumb, she bought a Wii and was satisfied with her purchase

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How many Chinese men people does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. Anyone can screw in a light bulb, regardless of race or gender.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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