Roses are red Violets are blue You think you're smart But I've got a plan for you.. Leaves are green Stems are too You lied to me Now I will shoot you.. Violets are blue Roses are red You made me angry And now you are dead.

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whats a joke... Parker Coffey at life

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Knock knock Who's there? Mike Mike who? Mike Davis from across the street. Come in.

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says,"Why the long face?" The horse replies,"I have terminal cancer."

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What did one hipster say to the other hipster? I'm not a hipster.

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What is worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm ? Getting herpes from a vibrator that you found in a dumpster.

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what is behind your butt? DEEZ NUTS

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What is the meaning of life? 42

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Duck, Duck who? Duck Sandwich

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what happened the magic tractor?..... it turned into a field

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How did freedom die in Europe? It was shot in the chest with a rifle.

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A dinosaur walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender goes home and tells his wife what he saw. His wife leaves him.

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Bill and John are talking about types of cheese. The conversation drags on a bit and slowly changes topic. Bill says "I bet you I can bungy jump off a bridge". John chuckles before replying "I bet you can't". They go and find a bridge and Bill puts on his harness and ties himself to the side of the bridge. He throws himself off the edge and falls through the air screaming at the top of his voice. John cuts the bungy cord and Bill dies.

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Paul and Steve, Siamese twins attached at the head, come to a fork in the road they are traveling. Paul wants to go left, while Steve wants to go right. They pause for a moment to figure out which direction would be the best choice for the both of them. They decide to go Paul's way, and as they continue to travel in silence, they try to imagine what life as a self-reliant individual would be like.

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John: Hey Debbie, do you wanna go see a movie with me? Dina: My name is Dina

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A black guy walks into a bar... he sits down and has a drink

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If life's a box of chocolates, I'm the dominant male.

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Yo mamas so fat she weighs more than other people

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What do you call a gay African American Jewish German flight attendant who is addicted to many hard drugs? His name.

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who is awesome? no one...

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Why was the Tortous and the Hare written? So fat people will feel good about themselves.

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Q. What is a deaf man's favorite song? A. Nothing, because he can not hear.

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Why did the chicken get hit by a bus? Because he crossed the road

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What did the flower say to it's friends? I want to kill a Christmas tree.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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