Your mom is so fat that she has to wear larger clothes than the average person.

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Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Gravity

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If a tree falls, and nobody is around to hear it, does it still make a sound? No. While the falling tree surely creates mechanical oscillations in the air, sound is defined as the mechanical oscillations in the air perceived by humans. Therefore, since no humans were around to hear the tree fall, it did not create a sound.

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why does my face bleeding theres an axe in it

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Why was Timmy sad?

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What do you call a fat zombie? Dead

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Why wasn't the chicken able to cross the road? Because it was disabled.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To buy more crystal meth to fuel his addiction while his wife and children starved in the public houses.

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Sarah Palin

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

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What do you call a woman who loves sex and food? A fat whore.

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If George Washington was the first president, and Barack Obama is the latest, how old is my grandma?

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Three men walk into a bar. You'd think one of them would have seen it.

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What did Bear Grylls say to the dead whale? Mmmm.

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Why did the black guy go to jail, because he did illegal stuff.

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Why should people with Alzheimer's not tell jokes? To get to the other side.

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Q: Why are there no tablets in the jungle? A: The pharmaceutical logistics involved would be enormous and would make very little business sense.

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How did the chicken cross the road? Chickens live in farms, they don't cross roads.

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? The person who made that "joke" down there has no life ?

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what did one dinosaur say to the other? "rawr"

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So a man walks into a bar and says to the bartender I'll have a beer

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A blonde walks into a bar. She got free drinks.

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And the girl said: "I'll be ready in 2 hours!"

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse replies, "My face isn't long relative to the others of my species, it is actually quite normal."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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