Roses are red Violets are blue Today is your birthday So happy birthday

Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black Because I'm blind

What do an eagle and a mole have in common? They both fly, except for the mole.

Q:what's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat A:The wheel chair

What is worse then finding repeated jokes on anti jokes? finding a womr in your apple

Student; Miss, please may I go toilet? Teacher; Yes, but say your alphabet first. Student; Ok

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, you should be a con artist.

What's so similar about a zombie and a black man? They are both almost human.

What would the world be like without 1 direction it would still be the world but just without 1 direction

PLEASE LIKE TO DONATE 50 CENTS TO MY CHARIDY .... SAVE THE PENGUINS IN AFRICA -BY LUKE BRANIFF

What did the little girl say to her step father? Please stop raping me

My childhood friend said she had a bad breakup with her husband (yeah husband), and that she needed a really stiff one. Come on! How was I supposed to know she was talking about alcohol! She did blush and smile after I pulled my pants down however, that`s like seven out of ten right? I mean I was just trying to help a friend out right? And myself, fine myself, but it will be a total win/win situation, you know... Those where you win twice? "Dont worry, Im not comming" *pewpew*

Many people believe that dogs are mammals. They're right

Why did the chicken cross the road? Too get to the other side. Duuu no one crosses the road to get killed.

How do chinese families name their children I belive it would be child because chinese families are only allowed 1 child

Q. How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb? A. Who knows? It's dark!

WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

A. Do you know what they call Bing Crosby in Sweden? B. No. A. Bing Crosby.

So I saw a man trying to push a plane. I asked why. He told me to mind my own business and go get ebola. And that's why I left for Africa.

What is a ghost's favorite dessert? Nothing. Ghosts do not exist, thus they cannot eat dessert.

you say "ask me if im a tree" he says "r u a tree?" you say"no..." then just stare at them

A mans wife gets pregnant after he has a visectomy... She was artificially inseminated using sperm he froze before the operation

your mommas so fat she jumped for joy and got stuck

What did John say to Tim Hi I'm John

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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