I have cancer. And you're next.

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Why did the little boy cross the road? He didnt. He actually got halfway across the road and was struck by a fast moving car. There is now a memorial on the side of the road mourning his death...

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Why did the schizophrenic chicken cross the road? He had to go to the clinic, the poor dear.

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i keep getting thumbs down...

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Does Fall come before winter? There is no defiant answer due to the fact that all seasons are in a cycle and our race has no answer to which season happened first on Earth.

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How do you leave a gay guy in suspense? How? ......................

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What's the difference between Josef fritsal and a fridge? A fridge can be thrown at a bowl of custard.

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. Lions do not have the ability to speak. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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Why did the Jew have very bad gas? He had very rough anal sex and air got stuck up his bum

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If you're American outside of the bathroom, then what are you inside the bathroom? An American inside of a bathroom.

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American: Nice cowboy hat Australian: hahahahahaha American: What's so funny? Australian: You're so incompetent... American: What does incompetent mean? Australian: http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/7/78/Trollface.svg/200px-Trollface.svg.png

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What did the doctor tell the boy with no arms or legs? I'm sorry, you have terminal cancer.

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Why? Because!

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my president is black, my lambo's blue, $14,400,000,000,000 national debt

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Why do policemen wear belts? To hold up their pants.

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im black

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Q. How did Kit Kat candy bars get their name? A. It was chosen by manufacturer.

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Why do black people eat at KFC? Because KFC serves good food at reasonable prices.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Eggplant.

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Why did the rapper carry an umbrella? Because the weather report said there was a 90% chance of rain, and he didn't want to get his posh new coat wet on the way to the studio

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ANDERS!! Thanks for the warnins, I mean I wuld beat you up even when I can barely move, but I just told the doc and the nurse to shut this door, thanks man, would never thought about that if you had not warned me... beat me up when I am poisoned? Your mom replied, it sasy "I do not like the idea" You know what I told you about not right? DO NOT THINK ABOUT A blue elephanT! WOSH BLUE ELEPGANT IN YOur MIND, ITS LIKE SAYING I AM NOT INTEREsted in KNOWING MUCH MORE! Your sister? YOu know she has a crush on me, ill fuck her so hard youul will know when she wont be able to walk straight or sit YES Id meet you, but you know... Ladies first... PS: OF Co0uRse iTS mY dick, in her mouth, it looks wrong because I AM FULL ON VALIUM YOu POISONOUS VENOM I wont turoture you, I mean not physically, but consider this the first picture, and if you want to see your mom and sister nekkid, then keep receiving picks. My skin is tan, yet they call me Black, the cloror of my soul. read below people, I am gonna bang his sistar, and his mom, watch out for the nekkid pics before they get removed on... Rate my ex, yeaaaah... any moment now, dont adress me anymore Anders, becuz the door is closed, and I cant saty awak anymore, nobody is coming in the doc said, its the bald guy with the smile, I told him to give you my phone with the last pic, he said maybe and asked if you wound nt get mad... Screw that phone, its full of your girlfriends nekkid pics anyways XD, he caught me sticking the finger btw, not the rest... And fuck you. Nero, the fucker.... Soon...

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William Wright. 8 perry street Answer-Gay

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What's black and blue and hates sex? The 13 year old tied up in my basement.

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What's that in the road.... a-head?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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