Q: What weighs 6 ounces, is extremely dangerous, and lives in a tree? A: A sparrow with a machine gun.

roses are red , violets are blue , sugar is sweet and so are you. the roses are wilting the violets are dead. the sugar bowl is empty and so is your head

How did Bob fall off the swing? He had no arms. Why couldn't he get up? He had no arms. What did Bob get for Christmas? Cancer.

What do you call a gay couple of kangaroos adopted baby A Joey

What did grandma receive for her 75th birthday? Alzheimer's.

why was the black woman forced to sit in the back of the bus? all the other seats were taken.

Why did the lightbulb go out? It was on too long

Holy fuckfarts! I did mention I am at my mothers place right? What am I saying? What am I typing? Marry me now!

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had a gun.

What's the difference between a car tyre and 365 used condoms? One is a Goodyear. The others a fucking great year!!! San2

What did Helen Keller name her dog? jhdfsuigtreyuiertfguiryhg

Tiny timmy likes timmy turner in his time of tingling on christmas.

What's Brown and sticky? A stick!

Q. What's better than a breadmaker? A. A sandwhich.

Why do they call it a clock radio?... because it's both.

There was a cat, an astronaut and a nun. The cat was sleeping, the astronaut was floating, and the nun was praying. There was a singer, a dancer and an actor. The singer was singing, the dancer was dancing, and the actor was acting.

how did little johnny die? i killed him

What's black and tasteless? either herpes or a redheads soul

What's funny about 9/11? All of it.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To go hang himself.

Who was sorry when the fat kid fell over last year? The whole of Japan.

Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

Why did the child die? Natural causes.

Whats funnier than an anti joke? a real one.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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