A guy walked into a bar. He got drunk. He hit a small child with his Suburu and was charged with a DUI.

Why did the sheriff cross the road? Cuz I told him to.

Who stole the cookies from the cookie jar? Who me? Couldn't be.

What happens when you push an asian in a hole? He falls in

Me: did u here the one about the girl got hit by a car? Man: no what happened? Me: She is in the hosspital with slight fractures and a broken wrist, but she will live

OSS ARE RED VIOLENTS IS BLUE U BELONG THE ZOO I WILL BE THERE TO BUT LAUGHIN AT U

JOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN WHAT'S THE ANSWER?! WHAT DO YAH MEAN YA DUNNO?!

whitney housten was supposed to sing at my funeral... but i dont think thats gonna happen. ;(

How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question! Feminists can't change anything.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the long face?". The horse doesn't reply because horse can't talk.

Two fish are swimming and hit a cement wall. One fish says Dam.

Why was the man foolish for buying a new lamp? Because he lived in a small shack with no electricity and was probably going to die soon.

Despite their parents wishes, two teenagers under the age of 18 tried multiplying. Their answer was 27.

You're Mom is Dead She was killed by a Grammer Nazi for me misspelling Your

Q:Wanna know a funny joke? A:Womens Rights

Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Give a man a gun and he'll build you a refrigerator.

How many dollies does little Suzie have? Enough to kill 15 men

roses are red violets are black why is your chest as flat as my back

What did the child with no arms and no legs get for Christmas Cancer.

Why was Timmy crying? because his impaled his dog while in a drunken rage

Why don't women wear watches? In the technologically advanced age that we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

Why did the hamster cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

why is everyone always picking on ruth? because they just do

What is purple, stupid, gay, and tells shitty jokes? I don't know. You think of something.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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