Q: Whats Red And Has Socks? A: An Apple, I Lied About The Socks..

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Every time a bell rings, a noise is made.

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If life hands you lemons you're probably a hippy because you know someone named 'life'

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what did one mental hospital worker say to the other? Billy your not a mental hospital worker, give heather back her clothes so I can escort you back to your cell.

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What's wrong with four black people in a cadillac driving off a cliff? The Cadillac holds 5

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She was dead

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how many pancakes does it take to get fat if u answered this question your already fat

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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why shouldn't hellen keller drive? because she's a woman

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what do mexicans need to survive............. a truck load of herowin and BOARDERS!!!!!!!!

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Why can't a Tyrannosaurus-Rex clap? It's Dead.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she is a woman.

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What did the man say after falling off a bridge? He didn't say anything. He died a painful and terrible death on impact.

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Drunk guy... Hey i just maybe And this is number But here's my crazy So call me met you

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Did you hear about the anorexic with the yeast infection? Apparently she's really good at math, and if she can overcome her afflictions she wants to become an accountant one day.

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Womens rights

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why do blonds write TGIF toes go in first

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Knock knock. Who's there? Honey, are you hearing things again? Nobody knocked on the door... Honey-are-you-hearing-things-again-nobody-knocked-on-the-door who? ...

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Where did Lucy go after being hit by a train? Well, the results of this question are somewhat difficult to pinpoint, but here is a generalized ratio model. 47% of Lucy went underneath the trains wheels and was left behind, crushed into the railway sleepers. 33% was thrown aside and discarded around the SIDES of the track. 19% was carried on the front of the train, into the next station where it fell off as soon as the train stopped. 1% was found in Mount Everest.

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I also wanted to write a joke but I forgot it so here I am. Minecraft rocks and everyone who says otherwise is a noob

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One day a horse goes to a bakery store and asks the shopkeeper for a fresh loaf of bread. Surprised at the request the shopkeeper asked - White bread or whole wheat? To which the horse replied - Makes no difference cause i rode my bicycle to work yesterday.

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Why do hummingbirds hum? They don't realize how annoying it is.

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A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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A: What did the orphan get for christmas? Q: Nothing she doesn't have any parents

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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