OMG this totally works! Step 1: Hold your breath Step 2: Die

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What was so funny about my sister getting raped? Nothing, there's never anything funny about someone getting raped, especially when it is a close friend or family member

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What is black blue and screaming? Your daughter when i kicked the shit out of her

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What happens if you don't use a condom? The person you are sleeping with may get pregnant or contract some kind of STI or STD. In worse cases you or your partner may contract HIV or possibly AID's.

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Want to hear a joke? Women's rights.

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A Horse walks into a bar. Bartender:why the long face? Horse:I have terminal cancer.

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What did Timmy's mom think of his art project? Nothing, she screamed and called an ambulance because she saw that he had tripped and fallin onto a pair of scissors and they just so happened to peirce his heart.

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What did the group of black men do to the old white woman? Gave her back the purse she dropped.

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A king's son's birthday was coming up and the king asked,"Son i'm the king. You can have anything you want." And the son said,"Oh i'll have some purple ping pong balls." For his birthday he got a rollar coster, a pizzaria, a new car, and of corse, some purple ping pong balls. The next year the king asked,"Son, i'm the king, you can have anything you want." and the son said,"Oh i'll have some purple ping pong balls." And for his birthday he got a manchin, an iphone, a water park, and of corse some purple ping pong balls. One day, the prince was driving in his car and was in a terrible car accadent. On his death bed, his father asked him one final question,"Son, why did you want all of those purple ping pong balls?" And the son answered,"Well, i wanted all of them because-" and then he died.

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why did oprah, your mother, and a monkey on a rock have in common? the ability to fornicate

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What do airplanes and grapes have in common? They both have wings, except a grape doesn't.

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Why do I know Vin Diesel is gay? Because I sucked his dick

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Why don't rhetorical questions need answers? Because that is what makes them rhetorical.

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Dislike if you are a prostitute

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In the beginning God created the heavens and the Earth. He then created the water, the sky, land, sea creatures, land creatures and humans. He rested.

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Whats worse than a baby crying on a plane. 9/11

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She never got her drivers license.

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Why did a guy with schizophrenia does it take to walks into a bar.

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My Japanese girlfriend just broke up with me. It's okay, there's more of them in the sea.

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Yo mamma's so fat, she's self-concsious about her weight and is embarassed when people make fun of her weight which makes her escape to her only friend, food, which makes her even fatter, so she will never lose weight until society accepts her and is not so prejudice towards overweight people.

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i yoused to cry a little when i laughed . then i got raped by a clown.

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What's big, green, fuzzy, and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

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I like my coffee the same way I like my women: without a penis!

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Wat do u call a 2 root tall scottidh man named max? Max

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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