How do you kill a lawyer? Stab him 50 times in the chest, slit him open and take all of his organs out one by one. Burn what you have left. That should do the trick. OMG I AM EVIL

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Knock Knock. Did someone outside the front door just say "Knock Knock"?

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Why couldn't the colorblind boy play Twister with his friends? He was a quadriplegic.

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what black and white and read all over? a woman who has just been beaten and raped covered in semen.

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A priest and a rabbi attempt to take a whale to a bar. But due to the enormous size and the need for water, the whale couldnt come.

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Why did the boy fall over? Because he broke his leg. Why did the second boy fall over? Because he was having a seizure.

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Mom: Ask me if you're adopted Boy: Am I adopted? Mom: yes

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ring ring young man: dad? mom's dead? woman: i think you dialed the wrong number young man: .......oh im sorry, you're absolutely right, silly me! woman: don't worry about it. young man: (chuckles) click

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What do Helen Keller, Stevie Wonder, and Ray Charles have in common? They were all mentioned in the previous sentence.

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"Knock Knock" "Whose there?" Someone who needs to consider not saying "Knock Knock" every time they are about to enter a building.

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Uh... No? Listen, the other 2 people that bother using this "site" (excuse for one) would not give a damn, and if some world government are after us they wont find shit. What? If I said no you would hack this site? My mother can hack this site, thats what makes it so useful for us... SO PLEASE DO NOT TELL EEEEEEEEEVERYONE THAT MY MORALS AND SHIT ARE ALL CODES THAT NOBODY HAS THE BRAIN TO DECODE PLEASE <<<<<<<<< *Sarcasm detector goes off* Seriously though, nah, dont hack nor delete anything, I kinda like how I got some thumbs ups on the comment section where I shared about my mother finally dying and me feeling the world against me great etc blahblah, "Erica" and "Wizard" thumbed those up and are now with us (seriously Wizard? Geek somebody?)

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I like pie. I know you do too.

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What did one ginger say to the other? W are both gingers.

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anti jokes are gay...your all gay

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What did the boy say to his dad when he realized he was gay? Dad, I'm gay.

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How to condom style ayyyyyy sexy horsey how how how how how to condom style

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theres this guy that i REALLY like but today he was putting something in my locker, it was gumbie the little green bendy thing but i didnt want it to be in my locker so i slammed my locker, except the only thing was that his pinky was in the way!!!! oh gosh i felt soooooo bad!!!! turns out he went to the hostpital and got stitches!!!!!!! that made it worse on me!!!!!! he said he was finee but i still cant let that go!!!!!

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When did the ball-room finally close? Closing time.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was unaware that it could get run over by a motor vehicle.

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Knock, knock -Who's there? Help -Help who? Im dying of lukemia

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Q: Why are lizards broke? A: Because they run around the desert with no money.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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What's black, blue, red, green, white, purple, orange, yellow, etc.? Last I checked, a bunch of colors

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[Jewish Joke] Some Guy: OOOOHH I GET IT Me: Anne Frank-ly, how did jew nazi this coming?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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