Because you killed my Llama. He was my best-friend.

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Corvette? I DON'T have a Corvette in my garage.

Whats a movie? A moving picture.

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

where does someone with one leg work? -no where this is a recession

Is your refrigerator running? No. That is highly improbable because a refrigerator has no arms or legs, also a refrigerator is not a human being, or alive in any manor and therefor cannot be moved with out an external force acted upon it.

What did the father tell his son on his death bed? Nothing. He was hit by a car and was now a vegetable.

Q: Why should you never let Jerry Sandusky babysit your children? A: Because, in November of 2011, Sandusky was arrested and charged with 40 counts of sexual abuse of young boys over a 15-year period. A man with this type of background does not seem like a an ideal choice for a babysitter.

What did Lance Armstrong say to his critics? I have one testical

What is the difference between Julis Ceaser, and the moon? The moon is covered in rocks and craters, and Julis Ceaser is DEAD

Excuse me. Oh, would you mind hitting the 15th floor button for me? Thanks.

Kinky = using a feather Perverted = using the whole chicken Weird = using chicken bones Downright disgusting = all of the above, plus a cat

Can Anti-Jokes censor curse-word tenses? Fuck Fucking Fucked Fucks

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black.

Jamie: Peter your hands smell like cows! Jason: eeh no they smell like cows balls

Why was timmy live on the streets? His parents didnt have the money to abort him!! HaHa

What's worse than having a gay friend? 9/11.

So there's this mexican with a big sombrero riding a donkey, it was a sunny day and he didn't feel like walking.

why did the boy fall off his bike? because his mum through a fridge at him

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I'm wearing pants and I'm hungry

how many jews can you fit in a car? 2 in the front and 3 in the back depending on how many people decide to go

How long does it take to acheive a superbowl win? However long it takes you.

man boobs

What do you call a Mexican who steals a car? A criminal.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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