How do you make a salesperson cry? Shoot him in the face and throw him off a cliff

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How do you fit 45 Jews into a car? 5 in the car 40 in the ashtray.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Around a thousand pounds.

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Why was Jeremy slow? He wasnt fast.

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Yo mama so dumb, she studied for a blood test.

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a duck walks in to a Chinese restaurant and they cut his head off

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why were there moans coming from the sandusky household Mike sandusky, was having sex with his beutiful wife, maria meanwhile Mike's cousin, jerry was sitting in a jail cell

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What's pink and fluffy? A feather duster.

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What do u call a black guy that sell drugs? A nigger

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A grandmother in her late seventies is walking to the grocery store. Then out of nowhere,she stats getting pelted by bananas. One hits her hard on the head,and she dies.

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Two robots are walking down the street together and walk into a bar. Just kidding, they can't walk because they have Polio.

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Have you heard the story of the empty room? Theres nothing in it.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had to arms. Knock knock Who's there? Well clearly not Sally

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because at some point through out the day, it had been relocated to the other side of the road. Since it was feeding time, it needed to return to the chicken coop or else risk death due to starvation.

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Why cant Helen Keller drive a bus? Cuz she's dead!

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No, I still have to make sense of some facts bits and pieces here, and thinking is pretty much the only thing I can do at this moment, so why would my doppelganger wannabe call me from her mothers place?

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What do you call a Muslim running a country? Obama

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a potato flew around my room

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What do you do when a guy pulls up in a van with piercings and a gay lisp, what do you do? Get in the van.

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What's a cow's fovorite vacation spot? Farmyard animals do not receive vacations, they have long hours, no pay, and get eaten upon death.

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how many letters are in Montana? 7 yes

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Why is 6 afraid of 7... Because 7 raped her little sister

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why was the Jewish child sad? He was recently abandoned by all his family.

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Why was the pencil case unzipped? Because it wasn't zipped up.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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