Q: What's purple and flies? A: Super Grape

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What is worse than finding an apple in you worm? Biting into an apple and finding 2 worms

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Need For Speed 30025 DRIVE OVER 60000 EXTREME CARS OVER 60 BILLION REAL LIFE GRAPHICS TRACKS! WHILE LISTENING TO BULLSHIT SONGS THAT MAKE YOU CRY! NO PAUSE BUTTON! EVERY CAR MUST BE UNLOCKED BY PLAYING THE SAME TRACK (Yeah music track too) OVER AND OVER AGAIN! OVER 6000000 ONLINE GAMERS AT THE SAME TIME WORLDWIDE, EACH TRACK HAS 5000000 THOUSAND LAPS SO THE FUN NEVER ENDS! UNLOCK ALL STUFF DLC: 6000 Bucks. Moral: So I have not been here since I called myself the sociopath or something, who the fuck are these Nero`s and Neronism and all that fuck? :( They almost improved my reputation! THATS HORRIBLE!

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a dinosaur with a large clown hat is walking down the street when he is confronted by an obese monkey human with red hair. I set this up for a good pun, but the one i have is potatoes.

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A plane is flying low over New York City. It's low on fuel and needs to land.

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who is 2 chainz? no one 2 chains is just 2 chains. spelled with an "s" not a "z"

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A handicapped man walks into a bar...

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. Once cooked to a golden brown they are removed for human consumption.

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Women's sports.

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Why did the black man say "I been done did that?" He was speaking ebonics.

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what's the difference between rice and an asian? one is a food.

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Five people all from different backgrounds get in a car and nobody get's raped.

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Why is Ellen Degeneres gay? Because she likes the same sex

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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Why had the father left his family. Because he was tired of dancing in a circle.

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How do you get 4 Jews in a car? Open the door and tell them politely to get in.

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What is the difference between a duck? One leg is both the same.

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Tell somebody that someone told you they look like an owl. When they say "Who?" laugh in their face

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How do you confuse a blonde? put her in a circular room and tell her to stand in the corner

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What kind of a prediction is THAT?

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No deal, blind trust and I help you, or no friendship, and certainly no reason to help you.

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How do you sink a Polish battleship? You breach the hull.

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4 score and 7 years ago was 1965

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What do you get when a sister and a brother have sex? A deformed child.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops