Why did the blonde kid lose the spelling bee? Because she misspelled a word.

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Tony Blair, Micheal Jordan, Fabrice Muamba, Aunty Josephine, Nick Clegg, David Cameron, and myself all go out for drinks.

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What's the difference between erotica and kink? Erotica involves simple arousal; kink usually has an added element of masochism.

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long in the tooth!

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So I went to the airport the other day, and the new TSA regulations are very strict.

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Laura Pratz..

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The new pickup line. The human body has 206 bones in it. I have broken one of them, please take me to a hospital.

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Chinese, Japanese, dirty knees - have nothing at all in common.

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An astronaut walks into a bar. He orders a beer. After waiting for about 1 and a half minutes he receives his beer. The bartender says it was 3 dollars. The astronaut checks his wallet and finds no money so he pays with credit card. The bartender swipes his credit card but the card doesn't work. So the astronaut takes out his debit card. When the bartender swipes the debit card it worked. In relief the astronaut looks at the bartender and says "Thank you" and then goes home.

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How many polish people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? -One

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69

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who has brown eyes blonde hair and red lips a human-being

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Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

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Why did the chicken cross the road Because early that morning she had found out that her husband had left her for another chicken. She became depressed and soon was suicidal so she started looking for an option out of her pain. So she tried to cross the road... She never made it.

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Why do women wear make-up and perfume? Because they are ugly and they smell bad.

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Did you see stevie wonders new house? No. Well he hasnt either

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Why couldn't Jimmy ride a bike Jimmy is a goldfish

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What do call the time things don't go the way you plan them? Reality. bitch

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall?

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Why are there so many smiths in the phonebook? Because they all have phones.

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Why does Chuck Norris always know the time? He bought a fancy new watch.

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How do you stop a baby from crying? Throw it off the top of the Empire State Building.

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Why did the man have a heart attack? Because he suffered from high cholesterol and cardiovascular disease.

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What would u like to drink?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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