Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms

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a man walks into a bar the other man ducks

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Your mama is so fat... she really should go on a diet.

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Hey i just met you. and this is crazy. I sent you my pubes in an envelope.

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I'm a little teapot, short and stout. Here is my handle, here is my spout. When I get all steamed up here me shout: Absolutely nothing because I'm a teapot you maniacal psychopath.

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Did you hear about the young couple that confused K-Y jelly with window caulking? All their windows fell out.

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Why didn't the 13 year old boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

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A man calls his wife, but she doesn't pick up. He comes home and shouts his wife's name, but no one responds. He walks upstairs and sees the bedroom door half-opened. He enters and sees his wife sleeping.

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How do you stop moles from digging in your garden? Take the shuvel away.

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What did Jesus say when he made the first black person? What another perfect creation to this world!

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Dude 1: Hey, ya see these coins here? Dude 2: ya, what about em'? Dude 1: would you say you see these pretty often? Dude 2: yup... :/ Dude 1: so would you call them COMMON CENTS!?!?!?!?!

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Q: what did the old man do to the little boy in his dark cellar while babysitting on a stormy night? A: told him to hold a flashlight because the power went out and he needed to find his electric generator.

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Q:What do African American men call the Internet? A:The Internet

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If it looks like a duck and quacks like a duck, its probably a turtle.

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a boy walked into a pet store to get his bird some food. they were all out. the bird died.

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I donated to Kony 2012. Litterally to Kony. I approve of his actions.

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roses are red violets are blue me n' friends guna rape you trolololoLOLOLOlololOLLOLOLOLOLLLOLOLOLOLO01010101010111 666

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. -It's funny because the robot doesn't have any arms.

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A neutron goes into a bar and asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?" The bartender, millions of times larger than the infinitesimally small subatomic particle, does not hear his question and so does not reply.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. :D

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A young boy asks his father if there will be cake at the party. The father tells him there won't be and tells him to f*ck off.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She didn't pass her driving test.

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Keith figured gasoline burns, doesn't it? He was wrong.

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What's worse than Bin Weevils? Nick Clegg.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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