What do you call a cow lying on a barn floor? A cow

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What is shorter than a toddler? A jewish lifespan.

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Two octopuses are swimming in the ocean. Suddenly a scuba diver spots one of the octopus. The octopus looks at the human and swims away.

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How do you fit 100 babies into a bowl? You use a blender. How do you get them out? Tostitos scoops.

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Boston was having so much fun everyone was running and screaming

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Q-why did the dog run away? A-he was Michael vick's dog

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which sex position produces the ugliest children? go ask ur mom

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Why do deer have horns? Because god made them that way.

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A woman walks into a bar and orders a pint of ale. "Are you a Lesbian?", joked the barman. "Yes", replied the woman.

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Why was the napkin wet? Some water was on it

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Ask me if I'm a duck. Are you a duck? No.

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Q: Whats worse than finding 10 babies in a trash can? A: Finding 1 baby in 10 trash cans!

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An old lady at an atm told me to check her balance So i pushed her over

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Why did the Mexican stop mowing the family's lawn? Because he felt it was time for his son to learn some responsibility.

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Q: What did the Rabbi say to the butcher? A: "Do you have the time?"

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Police. *No Answer* The Police then give the S.W.A.T team the signal, and bust down the door and kill 15 high profile targets issued by Liberia. The man who did not answer the door is Carlos Pedrojeuz, a serial killer, meth addict who has been a part of the sex slave trade for a decade. One might think of answering the door next time.

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Q:What do they call her? A: They call her love,

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. ------ Knock Knock Whose there? Not Suzie

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Roses are brown I like clouds this joke isn't funny so don't laugh..... Oh an I am trying to get the most dislikes so whatever you do don't like it:(:(:(

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Cry me a river. then try and build a bridge, fail, and walk away frustrated

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Why did the black man scream in church? He felt like it.

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A family goes to a talent agency and performs an act. They call themselves the aristocrats

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What do you call a black man with a brain injury? Mentally Disabled

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What did the doctor say to his patient? You were supposed to die 12 seconds ago....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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