Who needs god when coffee is cheaper

Yo momma so fat she weighs 400 pounds.

Your momma so stupid, she dropped out of school at a young age of 12.

Why cant Stevie Wonder see his friends? Because he is married.

It is cruel to want a "sky full of lighters" as, according to the Laws of Gravity, the lighters will eventually come back down to earth and incinerate everything below them.

Why was 6 afraid of 12? Because 12 used to beat up 6 and now 6 has a restraining order against 12. 12 has to stay at least 5 numbers away from 6.

Billy's alarm clock went off at 8:00 AM but Billy was really tired but still his Dad forced him to go to school.

Why did the dinosaur jump off the cliff? Because he was mental

Womens' sports

What did the doctor say to the patient? You have cancer.

A Hindu, a Jew and a Muslim walk into a bar. They then proceed to brutally murder each other due to their strong religious differences.

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

What's worse than being a replacement? An insufficient replacement.

Q:What's the difference ethernet a corvette and a pile of dead baby's? A:I don't have a corvette in my garage

If through some strange space-time paradox, Chuck Norris ever had to fight himself, Chuck Norris would-- What am I saying, that would never happen!

What is 9 + 10? 21

What's better than 24-year-olds? Twenty 4-year-olds.

What's green, three feet tall, and can live forever? Definitely not Julie Andrews.

do,Nt loagh at me I has dislecqsia

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs floating in a lake? Bob.

What did the chipmunk say to the nut? I'm gonna eat you.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Gerald: Hey did you know I was named AFTER Abraham Lincoln? Gloria: Because he was born in the 1800's and you were born and named many years afterward? Gerald: Ah... I guess I emphasized that joke a little to much - I'm sorry this conversation happened

Whys the Elephant afraid of the mouse? i dont know im not an Zoologist

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...