How do you find Nemo? Watch the movie.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why did the Asian man go to bed? Because he was tired

thumb_up thumb_down

This is not a joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

where was the heart of ocean found. madelain mcanns urn

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the baby cross the road? It was tied to the chicken

thumb_up thumb_down -117

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down

Two Penn-State Advisors walk into a butt.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can’t talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it’s a bird of prey.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Did you hear about the comedian cereal killer?...He raped his victims before strangling them to death.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? Whatever their names happen to be.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did the man not get home to his loving family? He blew up.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Who needs god when coffee is cheaper

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Yo momma so fat she weighs 400 pounds.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Your momma so stupid, she dropped out of school at a young age of 12.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why cant Stevie Wonder see his friends? Because he is married.

thumb_up thumb_down

It is cruel to want a "sky full of lighters" as, according to the Laws of Gravity, the lighters will eventually come back down to earth and incinerate everything below them.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why was 6 afraid of 12? Because 12 used to beat up 6 and now 6 has a restraining order against 12. 12 has to stay at least 5 numbers away from 6.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Billy's alarm clock went off at 8:00 AM but Billy was really tired but still his Dad forced him to go to school.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the dinosaur jump off the cliff? Because he was mental

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What did the doctor say to the patient? You have cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A Hindu, a Jew and a Muslim walk into a bar. They then proceed to brutally murder each other due to their strong religious differences.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's worse than being a replacement? An insufficient replacement.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q:What's the difference ethernet a corvette and a pile of dead baby's? A:I don't have a corvette in my garage

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops