How many dead babies does it take to paint the side of a building? I don't know, it depends on how hard you throw them.

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A: Hi I am a Mormon B: I know I'm one of your wifes

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall?

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A man is kidnapped shortly after being diagnosed with a new type of cancer in his left hand and is also left handed. When he is dropped off after being kidnapped it turns out a doctor hired the kidnappers to bring him a patient. The doctor notices the tumor is still in a stage where it hasn't spread to the rest of his body. The docter then claims to have a way to remove his cancer with minimal damage to the rest of him. So the doctor pulls out a laser sword and cuts off the man's left hand and says,"There, no more vancer for you!"

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Your Mama is so poor. I begin to worry about you and your familys' finacial situation.

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How did the girl get rid of a fever? She took medicine.

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Fine, just give me the top comment FOREVER, and I wont LIEK completely copy and assimilate your identity on Horsehead network... Forever... Muahahahahahaha!

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How do you upset Muslims? Kill their leader. Whoops, already did.

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Your mom is such a slut, she had unprotected sex at least once.

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a retard lost...

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Wanna hear a joke? Me too.

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you were my brotha, from another motha, you touch my girl, ill leave you dead in the gutta.

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Sally bought a shakeweight. She is an alcoholic and is ruining her family.

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Hitler.. Hitlar... Hillar... Hillary Clinton

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Roses are red Violets are blue I've got Alzheimer's Cheese on toast

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What do you call a two headed platypus? Go ask him, I'm sure he has a name.

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So a Jew an Asian and a gay guy all walk into a bar... ...I lied. It was an oven.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? I don't remember the rest of the joke but your mom's a whore.

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Is this the Krusty Krab? No, This is Patrick.

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a brunette? One is blonde and one is brunette.

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Q: How do you make Helen Keller cry? A: Casually remind her that she is both blind and deaf.

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What does an Asian do in a library in his school? Write one of these.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red-head are trapped on a desert island together After many days without food, they resort to cannibalism. The blonde eats the brunette, and the red-head eats the blonde. The red-head eventually dies once the water supply runs out.

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Why did the money due? Because it fell out of the tree

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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