What did the fat confused man say? I am confused.

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Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

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how long does it take a meth-head to rob your flat? not long at all, and they'll take everything. they need to, it's an addiction

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Knock knock Who's there? Miley Cyrus Holy moly, please come in! Here's your Miley Cyrus CD you order online Thanks you Mr. Mail Man

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Ask me if I'm a tree Are you a tree? No.

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100% of the people who go to school die. What about the people who don't go to school? They die too.

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How do black people vote? They go to their polling place, register, then vote for their candidate on election day.

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Q. What did the Vampire say when he ate the Pizza? A. Nothing. It is literally impossible for a vampire to be real, therefore it's insane if you thought it said something.

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A man hits a woman while driving. Whose fault is it? The mas. He was out drinking that night and shouldn't have gotten in his car in the first place.

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what worse the 2 dead kids in a van 3 dead kids in a van

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Sandusky went from Penn State, to the State Penn.

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Roses are Black Violets are black I am colorblind, are you to?

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A black guy and a mexican guy are in a car, Who's driving. A policeman.

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Knock knock Whos there? ... You got ding dong ditched

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doctor doctor i have been having a sore head recently . doctor : have you hurt your head yes

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Psychics.

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What's green and fuzy and could kill you if it fell out of a tree? A pool table

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? You shouldn't eat Jews, unless your a cannibal for which you should seek psychological help.

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How do you scare a plumber? Kill his family.

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What's funnier than my jokes? your face.

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Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After being told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, he walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

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Roses are red Violets are blue In Soviet Russia They had communism

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What do you call something thats mostly made of wood, big, round and stupid A retarded version of the Knights of the round table

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Why couldn't the black man be an astronaut? He was not qualified for the Job

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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