why did abby get fired? cause she showed allie anti joke.com!!! :0

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What did the Atheist say in church? His best friend's eulogy.

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How many immature teenagers does it take to screw in a light bulb? Your Mum.

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Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

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Guess whats in my hand. Can you guess? A gun. Bam bam, you're dead. Haha

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A Muslim walks into a bar. BOOM

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Why did the chicken run across the road? It was 9/11

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Three gay men are in a bath tub and bubbles come up and one says "who farted?"

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Why did the dinosaur cross the road? It couldnt because a chicken was obscuring its path.

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How did the blond become a pilot? By attending flight school, graduating, applying to an airline to which she subsequently was hired to, taking frequent training courses, and beginning work.

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Why did the man float in the lake? Because he was dead.

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knock knock. who's there thatsron thatsron who thatsron man

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What did the dog say to the cat? I have no idea. I wasn't there.

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Q. Why did the Mexican have to go back to Mexico? A. His mom died in an auto accident and no one in her village could afford to organize a proper funeral.

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German sausage is the wurst

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I hate being bi-polar; it's awesome!

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house red. Babies, especially dead ones cannot paint.

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Whats funnier than 24 ? 25

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a dad farts in the woods nothing else happens

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Why do blondes like cheez whiz? Because it tastes good

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69

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A child is in class. He really has to go to the bathroom. The teacher tells him if he can recite the alphabet, he can go to the bathroom. The kid holds his breath and goes A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z. The teacher tells him good job and allows him to go to the bathroom. When the kid got there there was a man waiting in the stall who brutally raped and murdered the boy. when the teacher noticed the boy was gone for a long time, he went to check on him. When the teacher saw the dead naked body of the boy hanging from the ceiling, he shot himself. The teacher had a family of a wife and 3 sons. The principal of the school had to call the Wife and let her know about the tragedy. The principal also thought this would be a good time to tell the wife that her husband has been having a homosexual affair with him. The wife takes her three sons and drives off a bridge. They all die minus one son (age 14) who had to grow up on the street with other homeless men. He became addicted to crack and when he ran out of places to get money from he decided to rob his old home. He broke into the house and didn't know that a new family has moved in, a married couple and their 1 year old baby. He doesn't want to go to jail, so he kills the baby, spreads the blood all over the parents, ties the dad up and makes him watch his wife get raped, then he shoots the parents before putting the gun on himself. A police officer who responded to the scene had a heart condition and the scene of the crime caused him to have a heart attack. But, he got to the hospital in time and lived.

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TWIX PAUSE!

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Billy. Oh, come on in. You could have just knocked on my door or rang doorbell without saying "Knock Knock" though, that's kind of childish.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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