what do a heater and a dead baby have in common? a dead baby is only warm for a small period of time

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A father teaches his son to ride a bike. Father: Don't stop or you'll fall. Son: Ok, dad. They have a nice time,

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here's a great way to ruin someone's 'knock knock' joke: Knock knock Come in!

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What did the big chimney say to the little chimney? Nothing, chimneys can't talk!

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Q: Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M Factory? A: It's hard to say. HR can not discuss the details of her termination, and the blonde signed a non-discloure agreement. She has since relocated to Biloxi with her family and is doing quit well.

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Two trains, on the same track, left different stations, and travelled in opposite directions. 74 people died.

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What is the difference between an African and French person? Nothing all people ate equal.

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What is purple and crawls? A wounded grape.

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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Q: Why couldn't the man get laid? A: Women were afraid of his 7 testes and 4 penises.

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Q:where did the little kid go? A:wait, before or after i killed him

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How did th-A fridge.

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b r o k e n k e y b o a r d ! ! p l e a s e h e l p ! ! ! ! !

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What do you call a fly with no wings? A walk.

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How many Jews does it take to fix a gas leak?...

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What was little Timmy's final words? I just want to go home.

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A man was drinking vodka at his friends party. He got a headache. He told his friend, and his friend said that there was asprin in the cabinet. The man ate some. He died. He was stabbed from behind, and the blade pierced his lungs.

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Yo mama's so gay, she's a guy.

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a lazy boy sleeps 23/24 hours. what does he do in the remaining hour ? he takes a nap

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There are too many 20 year olds getting pregnant. Teenage pregnancy is ruining our society!

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A priest, a rabbi and a scientologist walk into a bar. They discuss their various religious viewpoints until the scientologist gets a call informing him of his mother's death. The priest buys him a drink. Then the priest gets a call informing him of his mothers death. The rabbi buys him a drink. The rabbi gets a call. The scientologist expects it to be about the rabbi's mother dying, so he prematurely buys him a drink. It was actually the lottery commission telling the rabbi he won 48 million dollars.

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Did you hear about the guy in town living in a tyre, he got a puncture now hes living in a flat.

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Why is a banana yellow? I don't know, ask a scientist, stupid

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what did the orphan say to the adults wanting to adopt him? i hope u will provide well living conditions because i have lost both of my parents and am forced to live off one meal a day

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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