Why did the mom go to jail? She committed infanticide. lol.

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The early bird gets the worm, but the angry bird gets the pig.

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Roses are red Violets are blue if you think this is funny then your a jew!

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A man walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The barman says no.

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Why did the accident happen? The breaks on the car stopped working. Why did the breaks stop working? The driver was drunk.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in an apple? Getting shot in the gut What's worse than that? Getting raped in the hole made by the bullet

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Q: If a Hungarian boy grows up to be a very successful payroll manager and learns to love and hate, show compassion while firing someone, and how to re-image the entire white house's security system, how many pickles are in the doghouse? A: 17

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so a square said to another square,your rather obtuse oh wait squares cant talk,whats going on. later that day,chuckles realizes he isnt funny -chuckles

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Why didnt Jimmy go to school on Thursday? Jimmy is a vegetarian!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Probably because it saw some food, or because it felt threatened on the side of the road it was already on.

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Justin Bieber had sex with a woman.

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why did the football coach go to the bank? to make a deposit into his account

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a women.

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what are you eating under there? oh a sandwich, its actually really good.... want a bite? yea thanks! yum yum

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust What's worse then the Holocaust? Two Holocausts

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Why did Billy stop playing baseball? He lost his legs to cancer. Poor Billy.

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist.

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Why didn't Sally go to the party? Because everybody hates her and she wasn't invited.

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Why was the bear rushing home after work? Because he was late for dinner.

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A black man walked out a window of a 20 story building a detective arives at the scene it was night time and he said wheres the body.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Flesh is green When the dead start to rise you're on my team

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Where do you go when you die? Nowhere

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Why did the man have no head? He did it was under his shirt

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What did the Jewish man get for Christmas? Nothing. He is Jewish, therefore he does not celebrate Christmas, he celebrates Hanukkah. So he won't get a present for Christmas, he will get eight presents for Hanukkah. (He'll like getting a good deal).

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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