What do you call a guy who answers your door Whatever his name his

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What do you call it when a homosexual from spain is forced to have sex with a 400 pound black man? Rape

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How do you unclog a toilet? You call a plumber.

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200,000 people are homeless! ...this year in america!

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Whats worse than not having cellphone service? Having sex unwillingly with a stranger then getting pregnant at the age of 13.

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A man walks into the bar and asks the bartender, "Are you smelling me right now?"

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whats yellow and cant swim? a bulldozer

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yo momma is so ugly, she attempted to get plastic surgery and then died from the amount of blood loss she got when the surgeons realized her head was filled with tumors and they failed to extract them.

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If you are floating down main street in a canoe and your front right propeller falls off, how many pancakes can you fit in a doghouse? None, because ice cream doesn't have bones

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Yo mamas so dumb she has to repeat the 10th grade...again.

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In the movie Inception, what does the man do after he thinks about calling out to his children so he could see them one last time? The man calls out to his children.

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what the orphan boy get for christmas? Not his parents

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He removes the piece of lingerie from his face and continues shopping for clothes.

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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a duck walks into a restraunt.and the waiter asks "what would you like?" a quacker (like cracker)

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What is the difference between a car accident and being on your period? A period is less bloody.

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What did the chicken say to her chicks? One day I'll explain why we do this. For now, just follow me.

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Why did the boy have a tumor? Because he had cancer.

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What did Helen Keller name her children? Nothing, since she didn't have any.

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What did the carrot say when it was thrown out of an airplane? Nothing. It's a carrot.

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Why did the Asian Cross the road? Because the crossing signal went green!

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What's the difference between a black man and a gorilla? One is a black man and the other is a gorilla.

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How much cocain did Charlie sheen do? Enough to kill 2 and a half men

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Why did little Timmy scrape his knee? He was launched off of an aircraft carrier.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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