What color do you get when you mix blue and red? Purple.

What do you call a person who dies in march A dead person

What do you do when you find a robber holding a 19 pound sack of poultry? Think life through and try to find out how you had this coming.

Penis in a box.

Hey I just met? you and this is crazy I have alzheimers Hey I just met you

why doesnt john lipka have a job? because the unemployment rate is high these days.

Roses are red, bushes are red, trees are red....i set your garden on fire.

What did Helen Keller name her pet dog? dfhiwueghweigw

Do you think the death man heard the one about, oh wait I bet he didn't

Your mom's so fat, I tried to rape her but couldn't find her p**** and gave up. Instead I decided to take her out to dinner. We enjoyed a lovely meal and I spent the rest of the night trimming her fat with a vegetable peeler while she screamed and bled all over the floor.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead, ok!

A guy walks into a bar, and says, "The Aristocrats!"

Why are fish so easy to weigh? Because usually they've been killed, stunned or sedated first.

What's the difference between an elevator and a Mexican? An elevator helps society

"Knock, Knock" "who's there" "John doe" "John doe who" "I told you my my name was john doe"

Why does Santa Clause eat cookies? Because cookies not part of a balanced diet.

when u cant say fuck say firetruck because it starts with f and it ends with uck ?firetruck?

What's big, red and eats rocks? A big, red Rock-Eater

How many lesbians did Tiger Woods bang? None, his standards are much higher than that

Have you heard the one about the drunk cleaning lady? I haven't either but I bet it is good. That is a pretty good premise for a joke.

What does Tourettes Syndrome have in common with short term memory loss? I DON'T FREAKING REMEMBER.

Roses are black biolets are black I colorblind

there is a woman named shannen. she is happily married and has children.

I love you, you love me. Barney is fat and not entertaining.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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