What rhymes with bigger and can jump really high? Tigger

OMG, THIS ACTUALLY WORKS!! 1. Hold your breath? for 5 minutes. 2. Die

cow: MooooooooMoooooooo trafic light: beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep man:AHHHHHHHHHHH GET THIS FAT THING OF, OF ME NOW cow: MOOOOOOO (you shouldnt of said that or i wouldnt of swallowed you) man:TELL MY WIFE I LOVE HER (L.W)

What did one fat chick say to the other fat chick? Who cares, they're fat.

every knight i see an owl at window

What do you call a black man walking towards you with a gun? A defibrillator.

Why did the suicidal terrorist swim with fish? He heard the SEALS we coming for him.

whats black, dirty, and full of trash? A trash can

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. Our fast paced American society holds little value for birds of any species and this particular chicken was flattened by Ford F-150.

No this is Patrick, I'm not a krusty krab

YOU

Q: What is worse than The Apocalypse? A: Darkseid, Thanathos, Red Hulk, Onslaught, come on The Apocalypse cant even beat the X-men! Moral: "I AM THE APOCALYPSE, YOU ARE NOT FIT TO SURVIVE!"

Whats your name? Bill. I have a son named Kevin.

Rsoes are geern Voielts are ornage I'm colorbilnd and Dixlesic.

A black man and a mexican jump of a building to see who hits the ground first. Who wins? Society.

Q: A man walked into a bar and said, "Ouch!" Why? A: The man walked into a METAL bar.

You might be a redneck if you are from a rural area and act as such.

Know what's funny? Not these jokes!

Two men walk into a bar. The first one says, "I'll have some H2O!" The second man says "I'll have some H2O too!" Both men get water, because the bartender knows better than to give someone dihydrogen dioxide.

Whats similar between a plum and a rabbit? They are both purple, except for the rabbit.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Who are you?

Why did the black man cross the road? To get to the barber shop, which was located on the other side of the road. He then walked to the crosswalk, patiently waited, then crossed when the little person lit up.

a very large and muscly guy walks into a bar and finds a scrawny white guy he asks him if he has ever been in a fight with someone bigger then him the man says no the large man then leaves the bar and they both continue on with their day

roses are red, violets are blue, hey reed and steven, we should hang out

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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