What's cooler than being cool? An object at absolute zero

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Two Jewish Rabbis are sitting in a sandbox....

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What did the doctor say to the recently diagnosed AIDS patient? I'm sorry there is nothing we can do.

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Q: Whats the best part of a bald pussy? A: After you put the diaper back on you perv!

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A man walks into a bar and says, "I'll take a drink."

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What is black and white and has 4 wheels? A zebra, I lied about the wheels

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What worse than being shot? Waking up and finding a penis in your mouth.

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Usually, the bad (anti) jokes are the ones that don't make you laugh. Sometimes you laugh "with" the joke, other times, you laugh at the joke itself because it is a paragon for human failure. The jokes on this website are not exempt from that rigid stipulation. However, it should be noted that all the "jokes" on this particular website are actually hilarious because of the latter reason delineated in the above paragraph. Additionally, this joke was created by a machine and thus the originator of this work is by no means able to learn from the process of trial and error and therfore can make myriad unfunny jokes without compromise.

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I tried frying some fish today, and it started sizzling at me. I took it as a direct threat and started yelling at the stove. Eventually it stopped and dinner was ruined, but I was proud of myself for winning.

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Want to hear a joke? Unequal rights.

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What's the difference between a model and a baby? I didn't have sex with a model last night.

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When life gives you AIDS! Make lemonAIDS!

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a penis and a knife choose which one goes in you.

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What did the mentally retarted student get on his SAT? Drool

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? where's my tractor?

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Why didn't the lawyer submit the car accident he endured to his local courthouse? He was dying of internal brain damage from the shards of glass lodged in his brain from flying through the windshield.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's Where am I

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A gorilla walks into a bar and orders a banana martini. The bartender thinks this is a little peculiar and then becomes aware he is actually dreaming. He wakes up from his dream and begins to tell his wife about the ridiculous dream he had. His wife just ignores him, the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes his marriage is in shambles.

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why did the boy fly away because his mum shot him out of a cannon

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Why can't Roger drive a tractor? Because Roger is a goldfish

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How many average men does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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Why was the boy crying? he was so happy his mom bought him a playstation 3

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If a picture is worth a thousand words, what is a video worth?

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Where does lady gags buy her bran flakes ? Sainsburys

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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