What do you call a mouse that sings? Justin Bieber

A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

How do you make a tissue dance? You give it dance lessons.

a chicken and a rooster walk into a bar. and then walk out because a bar is no place for a chicken and a rooster.

Why did the squirrel across the river upside down? So it could keep its nuts dry.

Ever had sex while camping? It's great.

How long did it take azaha to have a shit? Nine months

i like men but im not gay

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a girl who was knocked off a swing by a fridge.

What is the most important thing to have during a zombie apocalypse? Oxygen.

no really what are ur names?

WHAT'S LESS THAN 0? FIONN'S DIGNITY AFTER HENRY'S

YO MAMMA SO SKINNY SHE HULA-HOOP THIER A CHEERIO

Why was the toddler laying in the middle of the road? Because she was the victim of a hit and run...

Why do mermaids where seashells on their breasts? They don't wear anything because mermaids don't exist.

60+8.99999999=68.99999999 soo close

Why did the man laugh? Because humans laugh when they hear a joke.

Q: What do you call a black girl with braces? A: A black and decker pecker wrecker

Where does the Queen of England live? England.

Why is Apple so successful? Well, that is not a question that can be answered simply. Many factors are involved in this, including but not limited to marketing, customer support, and smart business strategy. For more information, please visit Apple's website.

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

Your mother is so fat, when she stepped on a scale, it read quite a large number. She resolved to live healthier and exercise more.

A man walks into a casino, and when he walks out his family has no home.

Why didn't the black man brush his teeth today? Because he was already too late for work.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...