Q: How do you make a black man nervous? A: Threaten to kill his family.

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When Chuck Norris moved into a new house he decide to renovate because he didn't like the staircase.

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My dog got out of its cage So I found it and beat the shit out of my neighbors kid.

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Wanna hear a funny joke? Sure. Me too, do you have any?

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Incorrect. Violets are violet. DERP!

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm schizophrenic. And so am I!

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You know what makes me smile? Face muscles.

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What's the most annoying thing in the world? Yourself. (Your friends are saying it too, behind your back)

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was uneducated and was not aware of the dangers of streets in heavily populated cities.

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What does an Irishman order at the bar?? A beer

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Two chemists walk into a bar. The first one says "I'll have some H2O." The second one then says "I'll have some H2O too." Both chemists live as no bartender is irresponsible enough to serve liquid hydrogen peroxide in a public bar.

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Why is The stop sign bent? Because a ambulance full of sick kids hit it.

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What is black and white and red all over. A pile of dead zebras

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Knock knock. Who's there? Ed. Ed who? Ed Begley Jr.

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Your mother is so fat she sometimes eats a normal sized portion of food and does not feel satisfied

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

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what did the Spanish priest say to the Ukranian gynocologist? *fart*

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violets are blue, my name is Dave. this poem makes no sense. microwave.

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that feels sooooo good. -is what jacob says when his dogs hump his legs

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What do you call a gay dog? Steve

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Your mom is so ugly and stupid that people make fun of her and that's not nice.

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You know how hitler wasn't accepted into the art school ? The teacher who didn't let him join was Jewish .

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Q. what has one million arms and tells it to people A.a liar

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What is the difference between a tree and a person? Trees don't scream when hit with an axe.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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