how did the farmer die? his dog shot him

What has 9 arms and sucks? Def lepeord

A woman is hit by a car. Thankfully she manages to survive, but the driver is fined a lot of money for speeding.

A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

What do fish and dogs have in common they are both animals

Do you work at subway? Because I often enjoy eating there and i think the food is pretty good. I do not however eat there everyday because i might get overweight and get a eating disorder.

What's funnier than a fat person falling nothing is

sally was hit by a bus and lost both arms knock knock who's there? not sally

your on a bus and you ask your math teacher if you got the answers on the homework right and the bus crashes in the middle of an intersection.

What's worse than getting an erection in church Getting an erection while naked in church

Micheal Jackson walks into a bar

why did the man get ran over by a turtle? he crossed the STREET

What did the Cat get for Christmas? Nothing cats don't celebrate Christmas

"Knock, Knock" "who's there" "John doe" "John doe who" "I told you my my name was john doe"

How many babies does it take to paint a fence? depends on how hard you throw them.

Whats 9 + 10? 19.

What do a Mexican, and American, a black guy, and an Asian all have in common? Believe it or not, they all like cantalope.

Yo mamma so stupid Her IQ is sub par

what is black and looks like a mushroom? a black mushroom

Q Why was the boy sad A he wasnt sad he was dead and therefore had no emotional feelings

An amputee walks into a bar with a big smile on his face and sits down. The bartender looks over at him and asks "How did you lose your arm?" The amputee doesn't respond because he has been deaf and mute since birth.

Did you know Helen Keller had a Playground in her back yard? Neither did she.

Did you hear about Phil in accounting? No? Well he was trying to make a new type of car. He took the seats from a ford engine from a dodge, and the frame from a toyota. Do you know what he got? 5 years in jail.

Knock Knock. Who's there? An astronaut. He's all alone in the vacuum of space. No one hears him knocking.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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