how many babies does it take to paint a wall? it depends on how hard you throw them

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what do you call a fat black cat and a skinny white dog? Just two animals that are judged.

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Why did a hipster walks into a health food store? To buy some healthy food.

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What's red ad looks like a green bucket? A red bucket to a color blind person

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A man walks into the bar. It was typical day and nothing interesting happened.

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Poop

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

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Wht did noah7262 cross the road? to abandon his friends and play Modern Warfare 3 on xbox live. asshole.

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Want to hear a clean joke? Soap.

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While walking along the beach, a man stubs his toe on a half buried lamp. He picks it up, dusts it off, and a enormous Genie appears in front of him. "You have released me from my 10,000 year imprisonment. I will grant you 3 wishes to repay you." says the Genie. The man quickly uses his 1st wish for wealth and the 2nd for the love of a beautiful woman. Unable to think of a 3rd wish and seeing the sunken look on the Genie's face, he wished for the Genie's freedom. The Genie uses his unrestrained powers to kill the man, resurrect Hitler and enslave the human race.

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you that read wrong no you typed it wring my mind just rearranged the words to make grammatical sense

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What do you call a row of houses that are all different size? A poorly thought out construction project that has enraged townspeople.

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Why can't Jeff drive a car? because he is a rock.

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What did the vegitarian order for dinner? Vegatables

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What's hot and cold at the same time? Hotcold.

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Why did the cook throw up at McDonalds? Because his pay check was made out to the Ronald McDonald Foundation.

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what did the woman say when her husband punched her? nothing. she was physically abused for 35 years before she killed herself

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Your momma is so ugly... Yeah, yeah, yeah my momma's ugly, but guess what, at least I'm not an orphan asshole.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He is suicidal and should probably get help.

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Your social life.

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A: what does hellen keller say to her mom? B: nothing. she cant speak due to her lack of hearing and visualizing

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What do you call a blonde who likes to read? A bookworm.

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A witch walks into a bar and orders a drink. She gets her drink and proceeds to have a great time.

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What’s green and eats nuts? Syphilis.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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