Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm an expert on flowers.

Q. How do you get a black man out of a tree? A. You get a ladder and help him down

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

Why did Billy stop playing baseball? He lost his legs to cancer. Poor Billy.

Have you ever listened to the smell of the color 9? It tastes like freedom!

What do you call a black guy who gives out change? A cashier.

What did one Teacher say to the other teacher? Nothing. The first teacher has a horrible drinking habbit which is getting out of hand, He beats his wife and children each night after his drinks at the bar. His parents have stopped all contact and he found some divorce papers in his wifes draw, also saying she would be getting full costudy of the children. He has lost the majority of his friends and didnt want to loose another one, and kept his problems to himself.

You wanna hear a joke? The 19th amendment. Just kidding, women are actually a very valued part of our society. Just kidding again.

Me Neither.

A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says, I'm sorry but you have about four to six months to live. The man goes home and checks his million dollar life insurance policy.It expires in three months.

What did Helen Keller do when she found a dead body? Nothing.

What's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings

Q:Why did the man rob the bank? A:He needed money.... duhhh -Ryan Vallee

Where does the Queen keep her armies? In various military bases across the country.

What's worse than getting full-blown AIDS? Nothing.

A red-head, a brunette, and a blonde are playing hide-and-seek. Hide-and-seek is a fun game, so they probably had a great time.

What's 9+10? 19

What did enzo give courtney for her 69th birthday? A cake that looked like a pussy cat named kyle

knock knock Who's there? Someone who wants to save you from the shitty dinner your lazy wife made.

Q. What did the dog say to the cat? A. Ruff.

Whats the difference between a dog and a bird? They both fly

What's worse than the conservatives? Nothing, because conservatives fuck everything up.

why did the black man rape the little girl? no reason, its just a part of life. oh well

"It smells like Up dog in here." "How do you know what the dog from the movie "Up" smells like? It's computer-animated and not real." "I...I think I have a brain tumor..."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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