What did the poor guy get for christmas? The homeless guy.

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Your mother is so fat, that if she had 8 clones of her, they would probably not be able to stand in the elevator together due to the maximum capacity, and safety hazard.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To kill a hooker and get his money back.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? The victim of a freak genetic mutation and extremely susceptible to predators, meaning it will live a short life in the wilderness.

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How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at its face.

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what did the cop say to the robber... freeze bitch hope you like prison food and penis

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Why was the boy upset? His penis fell off and his mom was making him go to the library.

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Wheelchair high jump

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Your mama's so stupid that i wouldn't be surprised if you were to tell me that she didn't graduate high school.

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What did the little boy with cancer do? He died.

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you put the chevy to the levy when your pants fell heave diarea

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Why could the woman not play the game monopoly? Because she did not own the game monopoly

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Q: What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? A: Being caught by the store manager, arrested, convicted, and thrown into jail for petty theft and then getting ass-raped for the next 3 months all because you wanted to check an apple without paying for it.

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Pianos.

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What did santa claus say when he saw a girl standing on the corner? Ho Ho Ho... ;)

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How many batteries does it take to run a car 1 a car battery

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Why did the kid fall over? He was hit by a car

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whats worse than getting raped by ben rothlesburger well rape-victims claim that rape has ruined their lives and most of them go into deep depression and need therapy so maybe the only worse thing is getting raped again by kobe ---sticksack

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why did the boy and girl go under the covers together? because they were cold

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I would piss if alex berry had aids n died

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- Why Justin Bieber can't login to Facebook? - Because he forgot the password.

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What did the priest say to the rabbi? "Hey Joe, how's the family?"

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two hippo's were in the lake. The water was up to their eyes. What did one hippo say to the other? I don't know why but i keep thinking it's tuesday.

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There was 3 guys. A mexican, a black guy, and a jew. They work at a construction site and one day they found what appears to be a magic lamp. The mexican guy rubs the lamp hoping for a genie to appear and grant them wishes. Sure enough a genie appears. "I have been freed from the magic lamp." Says the genie "I shall grant one wish and one wish only to whoever rubbed the magic lamp." The mexican guy did not understand english. The jew steals the lamp and the black guy stabs him. The next day a blonde goes to the crime scene. He spot the magic lamp on the floor, picks it up, and rubs it. The genie appears. "I have been freed from the lamp. I shall grant one wish and one wish only to whoever rubbed the magic lamp." The blonde says "I wish Jose could speak ad understand english." Suddenly, the mexican appears and says "Thank you."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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