What did the girl say to the mute? "Why are you so quiet?" How did the mute respond? He flipped her off.

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Why is it hard to see a black man in the night? Because its dark out, and he's BLACK.

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One kid clicks his pen. The kid sitting next to home clicks his pen. They next 3 kids click their pens. The teacher walks by and says "monkey see monkey do." And the kid that first clicked his pen responded and says "monkey pees all over you."

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Knock Knock Dude there is no door

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Q: how do you test the sharpness of a knife A: stab someone MR

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Roses are blue Violets are red It's fascinating what genetic engineering can do

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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. Mice don't have the strength required to do that.

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Why was the jew so happy? He won the lottery which at the time was 3.40 dollars

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Whats the difference between a black man and a pizza? One has a complex circulatory system the other is a pizza.

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how do you stop a bus? shout FOR ALLAH!

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What do you call a bicycle that likes threesomes. A tricycle

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There was a golfer at the field where people usually golf. he had a golf club. so did the man next to him. The man i spoke of first hit the guy that was next to him with a golf club. Why? because he was angry at the man for shoving socks down his daughters throat and extracted her eyes with a melon scooper. This should not be humorous, the girl got blood and eye juice on her fathers new shoes when she came home.

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Q: When there's something strange In your neighbourhood, Who you gonna call? A: The Local Authorities!

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I am in love with pizza. It was a friday night and i was hanging around with my so called friends 'banana-rama' 'pearman' and 'peaches' (keep in mind these are all fruit). I ordered a pizza from Poker Pizza and it came an hour later i brung it to my kitchen and i opened the box. It was lovely. I eat it, i soon realized that I had eat my one true love and decided to order another pizza.

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Today I wanted to make world peace.... So I killed everyone.

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A:Knock Knock B:It's open

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Carlos was attempting to write anti-jokes. He sucks at writing anti-jokes.

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A blond, a brunette, and a redhead all entered their designated classrooms to begin AP testing. They all worked extraordinarily hard to earn a passing grade and receive college credit. The brunette and the redhead received passing, yet average, grades. The blond also received a score that reflected the amount of effort she put into studying and memorizing the material, because there is no correlation between hair color and intelligence.

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What do you call a man with a spade in his head? ...An innocent, family orientated murder victim.  X

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im gunna build a lego house what shud i make it out of

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Why did they save the man in a burning building? To arrest him for arson.

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Q. Why Did The Blond Have The Biggest Tits In The Third Grade? A. Because She Was 21

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whats the best selling shampoo for children and family? gerrmany's shampoo german engineering. i'm not sure I get anti jokes wait you don't need engineering for soap? HITLER DID -audience- thats mean who else was mean? uhh Mao? Stalin? STDS? -audience- no HITERWAS MEAN wat happen to him he became the leader and fuher of germany and was onn world domination? no he died abullet and a pill died killed him oh god 11 million people died because of him and we make jokes about it -its ANITjokes okay? t make this S$75 any better doesn't revive the fallen -okay......... LOL I bet that soap was actually eaten before by actidneet -jesus shutup okay ok.. sorry man .. wait man? single person? but waht abut "audience" I guess I want a crowd as big as hitlers but all I get is my twisted autism - billy turner died from autism and arrested for practicing naziism in public.

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what has four legs but cant move? dead dog

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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