Some anti-jokes are funny, some are not!

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A Jew and a German walk into a bar.

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Why couldn't the little pirate see the movie? His dad had just died in a freak accident on the boat. He was going to the funeral that day. Life as a pirate isn't at all as it seems. Little Jimmy the pirate, had nothing. He had no family. His mother dead already, his sister and brother refusing to speak to him because he ran off to be a pirate with his father. Clearly, he had no idea what he was getting into, because his father was gone. What was he to do now? He had no one to go to. The ship mates were all either completly insane or never sober. That very night, Jimmy took the pistol off the ship captian and shot himself point blank in the head. Little Jimmy is in a better place now. With his mother and father. In a place where he cant be harmed any more. I miss you Jim <3. ~ Jack Sullivan

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What's the difference between a good anti joke, and a bad anti joke? There literally is no good anti joke.

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A man hits a woman while driving. Whose fault is it? The mas. He was out drinking that night and shouldn't have gotten in his car in the first place.

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Why are you fat? You like devil dogs

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An Irishman walks into a club. "Ow, that was almost as painful as that time I walked into a bar."

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How many licks did it take for the little boy to get to the center of the Tootsie Pop? Three, and then he choked and died.

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Why did they monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the monkey. By darragh hamilton

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How so you find out if a black woman is pregnant? Have her take a pregnancy test

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A blonde, a redhead and a brunette were on an island. There were loads of other people too - the UK is a pretty popular place to live.

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he was greeting his new neighbors that moved in across the street. He was very friendly.

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So anyways, can I have the last comment or not?

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what did the black person say to the midget my dicks bigger than u

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hy-way is-way is-thay oke-jay pelled-say eird-way? ecause-bay its-way in-way IGLATIN-PAY

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What's cooler than being cool? An object at absolute zero

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A) why did the black guy leave the bar B) cause he was tired and wanted to go home

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A black man and a Mexican are in the back of a car, who's driving? Their father Micheal, he adopted both of them from a mentally handicapped orphanage when they were five.

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Science fact: what would happen if you lined up all the veins in your body? You would die.

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knock knock

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Your mother is so poor that she has to rely on government sent cheques to sustain a basic lifestyle.

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What's green, fuzzy, and would likely cause fatal harm if it were to fall on someone? A pool table.

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I AM DEAD, FUCKING, SERIOUS! NOW GET OVER HERE MOMMY I WANT TO... ...Thats pretty disgusting, I was born a man, maybe an infant man, but a man regardless. So how about you stop showcasing me to people here and we just take off? I mean I am dead tired and sleepy, I would say good night, but its day here now so yeah.

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Blonde hair is the result of having two recessive alleles for hair color in your genotype. There is no correlation between hair color and intelligence.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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