Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Japan

Why did the man have a really short temper? HOW THE **** SHOULD I KNOW???

what is more funny than watching a baby fly in a circle at 100 mph stopping it with a shovel

The doctor comes out of the room and tells the new parents that there is good news and bad news. The couple says they want to hear the bad news first. The doctor says "your baby is black." The couple then ask "what is the good news?", the doctor replies "your baby is dead."

Why wasn't jimmy at Paul's party? He died in a fatal car crash and flew out y The windshield and landed in boiling oil then a dog ate him.

Your mamma so jobless, that she needs a job! ~T.J.C.S.

Chuck Norris can drive a car using just his hands and feet!

Q: What did the little boy with cancer get for Christmas? A: Nothing, he didn't make it that far

An Antihumorous Story Part One A rich man named Richard told his son James that he could have anything in the world for his thirteenth birthday. James only asked for one thing: a silver box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. So Richard gave him a metal box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. Five years later, Richard heard a strange noise coming from James' room. It was the sound of a machine whirring, then a high pitched scream. All of a sudden, James bursted out of his room and ran out of the house. Later, the boy could not recall the incident. It was completely erased from his memory. For his eighteenth birthday, James asked for a golden box containing 785 pink ping balls. So it was granted him. For the next ten years, Richard kept a careful eye on his son. Every night, James could be heard whispering madly, "It's almost ready," over and over. For his twenty-eighth birthday, James asked for a simple wooden box that had one million pink ping pong balls inside. "What do you need all those pink ping pong balls for?" Richard finally asked. James froze, fiddling with something in the pocket of his jacket. "Oh yes, that. They were necessary for--" Then he got hit by a bus.

What do you call an Islamic man fling a plane? A very frightened passenger who took over flying the plane when the pilot collapsed due to a heart attack

I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

why did the chicken cross the road? because chickens are very absent-minded creatures. the chances are the chicken saw some form of bug or other edible life form from across the road and decided to venture over in that direction. if the road was not there, the chicken would most likely have still crossed that same expanse of ground, regardless of potential consequences.

Cleveland sports, lebron james' ever receding hairline

What do squirrels and Justin bieber have in common? Everything.

Why was there a black guy in the back of a police car? He was caught stealing

Get on your knees Ho

Whats fuzzy and pink? A pink fuzz ball

What do you call a cow painted in red a cat ( PS : i lied about the cow + the paint ! )

i just got all five seasons of big bang theory in the mail for xmas... i'm divorcing my wife.

what did the n i g g e r with alzheimers say to the c h i n k? 9/11 was the funniest fake joke since the holocaust and 9/11 and the holocaust and 9/11... and... what?

how did the family die? They were shot in the head.

What will ur wife say when she finds you in bed with a hore-s.

a Dyslexic, Agnostic, Insomniac stayed up all night, wondering if there really was a dog.

Lacrosse is the best sport in the world

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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