Speaker 1: Why did the chicken cross the road? Speaker 2: Why? Speaker 1: Every member of your immediate, nuclear, and extended family simultaneously contracted Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease (COPD) while being beaten, maimed, raped, tortured, and molested by a deranged serial killer during the sinking of the Titanic, eventually bleeding to death and allowing child rapists to eat their dead bodies.

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What is the worst part about being a black Jew? Having to sit at the back of the gas chamber.

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Why was Sally angry? Because somebody burned all her clothes

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roses are grey violets are grey im a dog

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What's funnier than 24? Many things, the number 24 is not very humorous.

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Why did the man jump off a cliff? Because he was committing suicide.

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What color was the black guy's skin? Brown

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welcome to anti joke.com. you were expecting an anti joke wernt you.

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Why didn't the boy run the marathon? He was cripple.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I need a job Stop spitting on me

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what happens when an unstoppable force hits an unmovable object? it goes around.

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What's white on top and black on bottom? Society

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair, Fuzzy Wuzzy had cancer.

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what do you do when life gives you lemons? take them, free shit is cool!

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If gluttony is a serious sin, why are so many Christians fat? Because they have bad eating habits.

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Why did the blonde drown in the bathtub? Her father repeatedly molested her and beat her mother, she no longer wanted to live in such a life and promptly committed suicide

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a gun, Get in the car.

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Q.What did the anti-joke reader say to the doctor? A-My finger is stuck on the dislike button.

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What did Michael Jackson think when someone threw a tomato off his head? The same as he was thinking before it happened, because everything that goes through Michael Jackson's head is pornographic images.

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Why was Joey bad at playing the trumpet? He had no fingers.

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Three old ladies were sitting on a bench. A man walks up and flashes them. The first old lady had a stroke. The second old lady had a stroke. The third old lady called 911 out of concern for her two friends.

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What's brown and sticky? Anal

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why did the Mexican fall and not the black man. i don't know, go ask the Asian.

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Two muffins in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says nothing, because muffins cannot talk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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