why did the chinken cross the rode? why? to get to the gay persons house. Knock, Knock. Who's there. the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did the boy go to heaven? He was in an airplane.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

you: Why did the chicken cross the road? them: "To get to the other side...?" you: Oh! *stare*

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what r the two best ways to describe a guy whose eating a bannana while peeing, time conservative and a multitasker

thumb_up thumb_down -5

The duck says do you smell poop. Ya says the chicken, it wasn't me It was the turkey

thumb_up thumb_down +30

A hot girl walks by a boy and he stares at her as she walks past. She see's him and asks "What are you looking at?", to which the boy replied "Oh I'm sorry. You happened to look familiar and I thought 'Perhaps I've met this person before. School? No. Work? No. I then concluded I've never seen you before and then you turned around and asked me what I was looking at".

thumb_up thumb_down -54

knock knock whos there jew jew who JEW YOU

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Once there was a frog. My parents died.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

shut up

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why didn't the chicken get to the other side of the road? Because chickens are in farms

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are red Violets are blue What was I saying? Oh yeah, your adopted.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

good looking women

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did the jew put a parking meter on his roof.? ....So santa would have to pay to park.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did elmo jump of the cliff caus he was depresed

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What's worse than being held hostage? Waking up and finding dick your mouth

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A man is kidnapped shortly after being diagnosed with a new type of cancer in his left hand and is also left handed. When he is dropped off after being kidnapped it turns out a doctor hired the kidnappers to bring him a patient. The doctor notices the tumor is still in a stage where it hasn't spread to the rest of his body. The docter then claims to have a way to remove his cancer with minimal damage to the rest of him. So the doctor pulls out a laser sword and cuts off the man's left hand and says,"There, no more vancer for you!"

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What do you call a tortilla from venezuela? A tortilla.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M's factory? For throwing away all the W's

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A kid comes across an injured duck near a lake. Nevermind he doesn't see it he's really high.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A fat guy at starbucks, waiting for his regular 160lbs breakfest. why is the 10 black kid crying? he's hungry and there is no starbucks in somalia .

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Potato.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What do you call a black man in the olympics? An olympian.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

why did sally drown? because she had no arms or legs and couldn't swim

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops