Titanic with will smith. Girl: I wont ever let go of you. Leo: Drowns. Smith: Move your fat ass over girl, there is like room for me and fifthy kids there yo! Me: Bitch if you need to float on a piece of wood where six of us could fit, im gonna drown you.

Did you know there is a whole country occupied with twins? It's called China

Where does lady gags buy her bran flakes ? Sainsburys

Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? Because it got hit by a Fridge.

What did the black kid get for christmas?? Your tv

What is long and hard that a bride gets on her wedding night? An erect penis.

If you can cut half a rope. You can cut the whole rope.

Q: How many dwarfs does it take to change a light bulb? A: 1 or 2. One to change the light bulb and maybe another one to guards the staircase for the safety of the first one when the ceiling is too high (Wich happens almost every time because they are dwarfs.)

Mum says therirs ups in life... I have the Downs

What did the Jamacian say to his friends? Yo me Rastas' on de cloud shroud atta boy 9PM we rizzle into da hitasses bar and we order us da drink of "grandpa's cough medicince" me tinks, who grees wid my view od oftaday Rastas?

Two muffins are baking in an oven. One turns to the other and says, "Boy, it sure is hot in here!" The other one replies, "OMG, A TALKING MUFFIN!"

What did Anne Frank do this weekend? Nothing. she died in the holocaust.

What did the pedophile get for christmas? He was raped by a gorilla

Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

A blind man walks into a book store. He asks if they have any books in Braille. The employee says "Yes! Many you haven't even seen before!"

How did the clown crash his car? A horrible tornado chrashed through the town.

What's has 4 wheels But ain't a blue car A red car

why did the boy drop the ball. he was shot in the head.

How can you confuse a blonde? Give her a calculus worksheet that she hasn't learned how to do.

Whats funnier than a anti-joke? 911

Fishing rods are cool This haiku does not make sense Lumpy Space Princess

What's the worst way to die? Alone.

Whats white and can't climb trees? A Fridge

How do you get a blonde to drown herself? Isolate her in an aqueous environment

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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