What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13 actually because, despite the potentially graphic nature of the previews, the creators scaled down mature content so that it could reach a wider audience.

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roses are grey violets are grey im a dog

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A duck walks into a bar and says, "Have you got any grapes?" The bartender replies "No." The duck then leaves but returns the next day and again asks, "Have you got any grapes?" And again the bartender answers, "No." This happens again the next day and in annoyance the bartender yells, "If you come in tomorrow and ask if I have any grapes, then I will nail your feet to the floor!" The next day the duck came into the bar and asked, "Have you got any nails?" to which the bartender replied, "Yes." The duck then walked out of the bar

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How was a blonde woman able to get into Harvard? She was smart and had a very good SAT score.

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Hey Shea

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Your mama's so fat.... Her cerial bowl came with a lifeguard

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It's yellow and you'll die when it comes into your eye. A taxi.

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a girl had just gotten dumped by her boyfriend over a text message. she got very sad and became suicidal

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What is worse than getting hit by a car? Getting hit by a truck

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What do you call a group of asians? China.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? A deer. The fact that it has no eyes doesn't change the species.

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Two penguins are in a bathtub, one penguin asks the other "can you pass the soap?" the other penguin says "what do I look like? A toaster?"

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Why did Sally failed gym class Because she couldn't do push ups

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Why did hitler commit suicide He looked at his gas bill

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What do you feel inside after eating an entire class of pre-schoolers? A stomach ache

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Why wasn't the turkey hungry on thanksgiving? Because it was dead!

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12

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A blind man walks into a library.

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Why did the black guy love his new shirt? Because it was 100% cotton

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Why couldn't Mike answer the phone on time? On his way to the phone he was shot and killed.

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Roses are red Violets are fin I'll be the 6 You be the 9

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whats worse than 9/11 a paper cut

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What's black, blue, and red all over? A baby after I kill it

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What do you call it when 1 person has an imaginary friend? A mental disorder. What do you call it when 1 billion people have an imaginary friend? A Religion.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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