Whats worse than being raped? Being raped twice.

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George Washington delivered a short speech to his troops before they crossed the delaware river. Here it is: "Get in the boat."

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Blond answers: Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat............?

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why do black people hate whites? their is no light in the ghetto

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Knock knock. *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

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How do you cut the sea in half? You can't. There are an odd amount of letters. You would have to jeopardize the "e", but then it would no longer be "sea".

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Roses are red, Violets are pretty, look at their team, Surrender at 20.

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I once had a friendly cohort, whose limericks often ran short, but this one doesn't, I don't know why, Also, he often can't rhyme.

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why dont you ever run over a black guy thats on a bike? because you will be sewed and also probably have the shit kicked out of you

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Yes, finally caught that mouse!

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Knock knock, Who's there? The police, you have committed 14 major felonies and you are being arrested.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 took sexual advantage of 9.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? 2 in the front, 2 in the back. And 6 million in the ashtray

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I hate it when people dont finish there sen

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally!

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If life gives you melons, you have dyslexia.

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I know what you do with your right hand. You part-take in everyday activities such as eating, typing, grooming and maneuvering.

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Whats the best way to get to a girls heart? A knife.

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Q.What does chuck norris eat as breakfast? ans.FOOD

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knock knock who's there peedo peedo who scissors

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what do you get when you combine a cat and a dog? nothing since it is impossible to combine a cat and a dog

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How do you stop the neighbors kids from jumping the fence into your property? Molest them.

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Roses are red, Violoets are blue, I accidentally shat my pants. Brb

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Why did billy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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