This guy went to the store because he needed potatoes. So he asked the clerk where the potatoes were at and she said "Isle fiveeeeeee!" So he went there and there were no potatoes ! hahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahhahahhahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahajhahahahahhahahhahahhahahahahahahhaahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahhahahhahahahahhaahhahahahahahahahahahhahaahhahahahahahahaahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahhaahhahaahahahahahhhhahha

a man shoots his mother in-law He his charged with murder and will only be eligible for parole in 18 months

-What did George Clooney say to Jennifer Lawrence? -"Hi!"

how many babies does it take to paint a barn? depends on how hard you can throw them

I learned a new party trick over the weekend; I swallow a piece of string and it comes out my other end tied! I shit you knot.

Roses are red, violets are blue Charcoal is black, and so is my neighbor

Q:whats the easiest way to get crabs? A:at your local seafood market.

What's the difference between a melon and a baby? You have to cut open the melon before you can eat it

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

An old bear-wrestler dies and finds himself at the pearly gates. Confused and at a loss for words due to the unfamiliar circumstance and lack of public toilets, he blurts out "Saint Peter, I presume?" but it was just the train conductor. "Ticket please." He searched his pockets and finally found the ticket. He wished he had a dog, but not a seeing-eye dog because people would assume he was blind. This story illustrates the importance of situational awareness, remembering which pocket you put your ticket in, and not forgetting to go before you leave because you don't know when you'll be able to find a restroom.

why was 6 jealous of 7? 7 had a huge dick.

2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

A man adopts an orphan. He waits till the child is a teenager to tell the news. He then commits suicide as to scar the child emotionally for the rest of its life.

knock, knock whos there the police your son was the victim of a cruel homocide

What did the Muslim say to the Sikh? "Hello. Lovely weather today."

A man walks into a bar... "Ouch"

Knock Knock! Come in the door is unlocked. I have cookies!

What is the worst thing to say to a dying person? After you die I'm going to defile your corpse, nan.

An over weight person is diagnosed with anorexia they used to be fatter

Q-What happened to the kid who thought he could fly A-his head exploded while he was sitting in a microwave

A man walks up to a gay guy and says "you are socially accepted"

miley cyrus

knock knock whos there? orange orange who? orange you pissed off your wifes taking in the ass from another guy right now?

What did the dog say to the mouse? Cat

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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