How do you eat a candy cane? Shove it in your mouth and chew.

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OH MY LUMPIN GOD!

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What do you get when you cross a muffin with chocolate chips? A chocolate chip muffin.

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Only one, but he may forget to finish the task due to his Alzheimer's.

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When life gives you lemons, Commit felonies

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Guess what? What? You guessed correctly.

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Why did the little girl cry when she fell off the slide? Because when she fell she hit the dirt ground, cause dust to fly into the air, he eyes started to water in response to keep her eyes from being damaged. The slide however, was taken down, too many children had been hurt while playing on it. The community is now pooling money together in order to build a new playground.

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What is annoying and uses another language? Spanish class!

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What do you call a black guy who walks into your house and takes your stuff. A repoman, pay your taxes next time

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Its crackers to slip a rozer and dropsey in snide.

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whats funny about this joke? nothing.

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why was the boy sad? he had a frog stapled to his face

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david what a baghead

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Knock knock Who's there? The Land Lord The Land Lord who? I am here to evict you.

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

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What was the last song those aboard the Titanic sang? "Staying alive"

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A man walks into a bar and orders a strong drink Bartender: Why the long face Man: My wife was recently killed in a horrible car accident Bartender: Oh my god, I'm so sorry Man: Jks I have AIDS

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How do you kill a blond? Shoot her in the face.

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What's worse than getting a paper cut? Getting shot in the face.

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What did the hooker get for christmas? Herpes

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Knock knock! Who's there? ... There was no reply because the person who knocked was the mailman delivering a package, and he had a tight schedule so he couldn't stay around to chat.

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A muslim walked into a bar. Then he walked out because he had made a wrong turn.

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The joke below this comment is stupid. Lets go Mets

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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