Jesus said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But, John came fifth and won a toaster.

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If you pull a pin out of a grenade, is it possible to put it back? I need a quick answer for this question.

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Why did the boy fall of his bike? Becuase he was hit by a couch.

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two people are falling out of a plane, a blond and a brunnete who hit the ground first. the blond, the brunnete brought a parachute

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whats worse than find a worm in your apple? finding the holocaust in your apple.

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What can a Giraffe have, that no other animal on Earth can? A baby Giraffe.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

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Billy Cundiff.

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everyone wonders y grandmas dont wear bra's its because if youre that old u might die putting it on

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Bob: Say this word that I spell out. Jane: Ok Bob: N.I.N.A. Jane: Um...Nina? Bob: Correct. Now try N.I.N.O. Jane: Nino like el nino Bob: Good. How about N.I.N.E. Jane: Ninny? Bob: Hahaha wrong

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Sugar is sweet, Who gives a shit

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can you touch your toes? no

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Where did Susie go during the explosion? On her knees to catch it.

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do you have a wife?

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whats worse than getting a fail on your math test? Getting shot.

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Why would a dog sniff another dog's butt hole? Because that is what they do.

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roses are red yoda is green my lightsaber needs 2 hands if you know what i mean

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Once upon a time there was a boy who was 16 and a girl who was 14. The guy is in year 10 and the girls is in year 9 . Alot of people think he is a pedofile. Comment your opinion.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Me: What's the difference between a zebra and a slice of cheese? You: I don't know Me: Me neither

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Boy 1: What comes after L? Boy 2: Elephant, elbow, elk, elementary, Elliot, Elder Scrolls? Boy 1: No. Boy 2: What is the answer? Boy 1: M

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Where does Charlie Sheen buy his clothes? Winners

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I went to the store and I fell

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How do you steal from a sushi buffet? You say please.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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