My Friend Philip had his lip removed today. he is just Phil now.

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You know what they say about women with really big feet? They actually don't say anything.

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whats worse than getting the girl you're talking to taken from you? getting the girl you like taken from you.. by a asian.

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You know whats worse than finding 3 dead children in your house? Finding 2 dead children in your house.

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What do you call a gay man? Phil Krahn

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How did the little boy get lost? He didnt he got dragged into a van and was raped violently.

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Why didn't the boy eat his soup? It was to hot.

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how many black guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?................ we dont know because u cant c them

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What do you call a white guy surrounded by 5 black guys? D-12.

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I have a gay camel

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"This is defamation!" proclaimed the Fox, as he sat in the panels of the courtroom. "I attest, with full honesty, Your Honor, that never have I said any of the allegations the two defendants have quoted upon me." He looked with contempt at the Ylvis brothers, who sat at the other end of the room. "I say, Your Honor," he continued, "that I never, ever in my entire life, said 'Gering-ding-ding-dingerdingerding', to which I am willing to testify."

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What did the Priest say to the Rabbi? Nothing. The Priest was mute and the Rabbi was deaf.

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Where's Waldo? Nowhere. Waldo is a fictional character. He doesn't exist.

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Knock knock. ... ... *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

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Why shouldn't you play poker in the woods? Due to the stereotypical lack of human population in such an area, it would be excruciatingly difficult to find a partner with which to play competitive card games. I suggest trying solitaire instead.

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A man walks into a car dealership. The salesman was nice and he bought a Mercedes.

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What did the fat man with scissors do? Cut off the foreskin of your penis.

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Yes!

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this is an anti joke THIS IS NOT A JOKE O:

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What is not a crocodile? The teenage mutant ninja turtles

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Knock knock Who's there? No Who is over there

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Who's a looser and has no friends??? Max!!! His address is 2131 HighHills Narrow...

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What's big, brown, and barks? Tree

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A midget walks under a bar

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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