Your mother is so fat that unfortunately she can not fit into her picture for her passport and is not allowed to leave the country to go visit her dying mother.

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why did the boy buy a dirty magizine? he should not have, its been on the floor. who wants to read the rolling stone magizine if it has dirt on it. how dumb of him.

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What do you get when you multiply a trillion times a billion times a quintillion? A huge ass number.

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Johnny fell out of the window. Except he didn't fall I pushed him

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why are these jokes so funny? why are u so fat bitch

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Do you want to hear a joke? Sure. Justin Bieber is straight.

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what did i do after u pinched me? i killed everyone

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Jim and Larry work together. Jim works hard, and Larry is a bit of a prankster. One day, Jim is having a rather rough day, and Larry looks to cheer him up with a good-natured joke. Knowing that Jim's wife prepares dinner for him every night of the week, he calls her and tells her that their boss has decided to pay for a dinner out, that she should take the day off and just get ready for Jim to come home and pick her up. Larry will later follow up by calling a pizza delivery place and having them send a special no hard feeling message with two large delicious pizzas. He forgets to call the pizza delivery man until later that night, after which it's too late and he thinks "I'll just explain the joke to Jim tomorrow." And goes peacefully to sleep. Arriving home and finding that dinner is not prepared, Jim savagely beats his wife.

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So the docter saw the girl had a "M" on her chest during surgery. He asked her if he had a boyfreind from Michigan. She said "no, but i have a girlfreind from winsconsin, why do u ask?"rf

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Knock knock? Whose there? Who's. Who's who? No you used the wrong form of who's.

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A young man spent his summer as an intern at a school. He eventually became a real estate agent but it was a pretty cool experience.

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If a midget is mentally retarded and always late for work, is it okay to call him a little tardy?

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What bad thing could happen if you gave a black man a gun? ....stop expecting some racist punchline!

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Q: Why are elephants afraid of mice and/or rats? A: Elephants tend to have bad eyesight and startle quite easily?

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knock knock... who's there? your grandmother, now please let me in it's very cold outside. *you now proceed to open the door for your grandmother as she is elderly and you dont want her to freeze

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Why did Billy Bob kidnap Jamal? Because he finds the African American community fascinating and is unable to start up a regular conversation due to the over-amplified stereotype that rednecks usually kidnap and/or kill black people. Therefore, kidnapping Jamal was necessary so that he could have a conversation with him about his heritage and background.

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yo mama is so fat she is 1 candy bar away from dieing

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot you racist.

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What is the difference between the number 20 and 21 1

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Why did Eduardo cross the road. The same reason he crossed the border.

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Women age like a fine wine: sediment develops as they lose their tannins, and earthy notes of oak and mineral develop in their flavor profile, giving them a lengthened finish.

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yo mamma so fat she seen a yellow train full of white people and she said stop that twinkie

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A Mexican and a black person both jump off a bridge, who hits the water first? Neither, as all matter falls at the same rate, regardless of weight, size, or ethnicity.

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash and the other one is a watermelon.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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