A duck walks into a bar, clearly ignoring the 'No Ducks Allowed' sign that had been placed in the window to prevent comedic scenarios.

If i was a painting... Id hang myself

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

Whats black, dead, and hangs from a tree in my backyard? Your Mom

Why did the pig walk into the bar Because he was thirsty

How do you get a black kid to sleep? A cup of warm milk and maybe a lulluby should do it.

Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

What did the Nazi say to the farmer? Sie sind Juden versteckt

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Wanna hear a joke? No.

emma: how will we survive zombies? mat t: just give me a blow job ......4 seconds later emma: so what now?

why did the chicken cross the road? because the light was green

what do you call a man with one leg? whatever his name is.

Roses are black, Violets are too. I am colorblind, How about you?

What's a group of people that has an N, an I, two Gs, an E and an R that have no souls? Gingers.

Knock knock Whos there? No one, your wife was just in a fatal car accident and died on the scene, so your kids had to walk home from school instead of being picked up. Your son Scotty was grabbed by the sexual predator 4 blocks from the school, and your daughter Sally tried to run and is now under the wheels on the bus going round and round.

Why did Timmy pass his chemistry exam? Because he studied.

Why did Michael Jackson ask a Best Buy clerk for the best 3D TV? He didn't ... He's dead.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the Crossing Guard union had reached a collective agreement and they had returned to work and it was safe to cross once again.

What's the worse part about a Jewish man dying in a house fire? It was his birthday

Why did the rooster go to kfc? To see a chicken strip

Whats Worse then finding a worm in your apple. Finding a real joke on anti-joke.com

How can you tell if a substance is an acid or a base just by looking at it? You can't. pH or Litmus paper would be necessary in order to determine whether a substance is an acid or a base.

What do you call a Mexican who likes to eat burritos? A Mexican

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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