what looks about a computer which has two wheels? a bike. i lied about the computer...

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Q:Whats yellow and on the floor in the bathroom? A: A Rubber Ducky

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Nickelback

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Once there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

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How do you get children to behave? Chop them up.

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What do you call a blue duck that speaks? A dream.

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An alcoholic walks into a bar, but then realises he's ruining his family so he calls the rehab

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What is a pirate's favorite color? It depends on the pirate.

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why did suzie fall off the swing? because she had no arms.. knock, knock who's there? not suzie

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What did the gay man receive for christmas? AIDS

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I am just trying to grasp the terms you use Nero, you are a genius, I mean I always heard about it, but honestly, well, my first impression of you here was... Different.

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Grandma got ran over by a reindeer. She died.

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quantum physics?

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Why should this joke be funny? It shouldn't, because its an anti-joke.

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Based on every event that ever happened on Earth, where is a terrorist most likely to plant a bomb? Site B. Many more people play CS:GO than attempt to bomb any real-world location. Site A is a close second.

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i'm hard

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Why was the student late for class? Because paraplegics can't drive.

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roses are red, violets are purple, some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

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What did the man do after he got in his car with out his keys? He started it up and drove Away

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What's scarier than a ghost? Ur mum.

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Three dogs start a club called the Holly Place Exclusive Dog Club. The Club Motto is, "You can't be in our club. Just us. Read the sign. It says "Exclusive". How is that confusing? Get away from here. Now."

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How do you put a giraffe in a refrigerator? You open the door, put the giraffe in and close the door. How do you put an elephant in a refrigerator?. . . . . . No! You open the door, TAKE THE GIRAFFE OUT, and put the elephant in. So, the lion calls a meating in the animal kingdom and who's not there? The elephant, he's in the refrigerator. You have to cross a river infested with crocodiles, and you don't have a boat. How do you get across?. . . . . . No! You get in the river and swim across because the crocodiles are at the meating with the lion!

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Q: What do you do when you meet someone new? A: You don`t know and expect me to do so? Get a life!

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Two guys walk into a bar, and they ordered two drinks. Then the bartender said, "Two dollars, please." - Brandie PANG

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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