Why doesn't Santa Claus like cantaloupe? Because he doesn't exist. You have to exist to like cantaloupe.

guy walks into a bar.... Ouch.

What did the senile man say to the kids on his lawn? Tree dance the gator thong for my nipples.

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind, not to mention deaf and mute.

Teacher: Why didn't you do your homework? Student: My friends told me not to. Teacher: So if your friends tell you to go jump off a bridge, would you do it? Student: Well, it all depends on if I land on a fat kid. Like Chubb. Chubb: Yeah, I know, my eating habit, i-i-its a big problem. -Payden R.

Who looks like Zach Efron? Shrek.

What did the orphan wish for Christmas during world war II? Parents What did he get? Bombed.

A man walks into a bar. It was a metal bar. He got hurt.

Why did the white girl become a lesbian? Because she was raped and had no more trust in the male gender.

knock knock. who's there? someone.

KIMBERLEY HONEY

PLEASE DONT READ THIS OR YOU'LL BE DIED IF YOU DONT THUMBS UP THIS LIKE POST THIS ON 20 MESSAGES OR YOU'RE BEST MAKE THE MOST OF YOUR LIFE WITHIN THE NEXT 7 DAYS

What's black and white and red all over it? Not a newspaper because red is not all over it. Answers to this question may vary.

What do you get when you mix a burrito and an earthworm? Diaherea

Why did the man turn up at his friend's funeral dressed as Mickey Mouse? Because it would have been disrespectful not to attend.

Why was the white man arrested? He was a rapist.

How do you get 100 midgets into a Mini? You have to manufacture a Mini large enough to accommodate 100 midgets. It wouldn't be street-legal, but at least the problem of getting 100 midgets into a Mini is solved

A man walks into a doctor's office and says, "Doctor, help! My hair is falling out! I need something to keep it in!" The doctor says, "sure. Here's some medicine."

Y did a fat woman cross the rode? To get to McDonalds

Q: What did the air freshener say to the car??? A: Nothing. Air fresheners are inanimate objects

JESUS SAYS PICTURE HERE ..... Throws a party for 12 people the world still talks about 2012 years latter !

What's small and doesn't turn girls on? A bottlecap.

How do you burn Lebron James's house? With fire.

Some people are like Slinkies: they don't work as well as they say they will and you'll get bored of them quickly.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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