Knock knock Who's there? The police, we know you've been pirating movies.

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2 muffins are in an oven. One says to the other, "it's really hot in here!" the other replies, "WHOA. A talking muffin!"

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caoimhin is a dorty carrot

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What's the only part of a vegetable you cant eat? The wheelchair

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Why is the sky blue? the game

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What did Helen Keller say when she fell into a well? Nothing. She died upon impact and her family mourned her death for years.

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Why did Doris fall down the stairs? Because she was a stupid, uncoordinated old hag with no control over her bladder.

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I like boys!!!!! CC

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Reading another damn "worm in your apple" joke.

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Shit Happens....or sometimes it doesn't! As the person is taken to the hospital with severe constipation.

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Q: What did the man ask the waiter when he was seated at Cracker Barrel? A: May I please have more golf tees?

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A black man walks up to the cashier with twenty buckets of KFC and seventeen gallons of grape Kool - Aid. The cashier says, "Do you want a bag for those?"

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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An Asian teenager bought his first gun, and proceeded to go hunting with his father in the wilderness.

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Q. How do you drowned a blond A. Put a scratch and sniff at the bottom of a pool

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David walks into a bar. Someone shoots him. Now hes dead.

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What did the racist wife give to her black husband on their anniversary? Golf clubs because he liked to golf.

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A priest, a rabbi, and a minister walk into a bar. The three of them discuss theology for quite some time and then begin approach various patrons with invites to attend their respective Sunday services.

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How do you kill a turtle? You can't, it has a shell for a reason.

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what do you call a half dead black person crawling across your lawn..............................stop laughing and reload

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A police man, doctor and stage actor walk into a bar. They're identifying the corpse of the stage actor's brother.

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What did Justin beiber get for Christmas? A dildo.

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What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? Nothing, it's still a dinosaur! Her sexual orientation is regardless. ~kyle hudson

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What did the dinosaur say to the centipede? It's funny cause the dinosaur is big and the centipede is small.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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