whats worse than finding a joke in a cracker? finding an anti joke in a cracker.

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How do you get a baby out of a blender? With tortilla chips.

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What is the difference between a painting and Jesus? It only takes one nail to put up a painting

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What do you get when you mix your mom and your dad? YOU!!!

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do you want to hear a joke?

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he wanted to prove he wasn't chicken

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What do you call a black man with a lip desiese? Jumbo shrimp

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STFU Stop Tickling Fuzzy Unicorns they really don't like it

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What's worse than loosing your pen? Getting raped by a pedophile.

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Q: How did the Irishman die? A: He was old.

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Person 1: "Ask me if I'm a rock." Person 2: "Are you a rock?" Person 1: "No."

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Whats black and yellow and makes you laugh? A bus full of niggers driving of a cliff

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What did the fat man buy at Mcdonalds? A unicorn

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Girl: I love you in a platonic way Guy: ... Is that some kind of fat joke!

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Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

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What can you tell by a black guy who walks into a bank with a ski mask on? His face was severely disfigured in a horrific accident.

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Why did the witch stay up all night with a broken broomstick? Because she couldn't sweep.

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Knock-Knock who's there? Artichoke Artichoke who? Your friend Artie choked on a ham sandwich, and I'm sorry to inform you that he didn't survive.

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what smelss like crap.... CRAP dose DUH

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Your uncle jack just helped you off a horse. Now it's your turn to help your uncle jack off a horse.

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Knock Knock "Who's There?" *No answer* The man proceeds to go on with his life

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Roses are red Kittens are fluffy This doesn't rhyme Cupcake

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ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha...................... Wats so funny?

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You know how geese fly in a V formation and sometimes one side is longer than the other. Do you know why that is? Because there are more geese on that side.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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