Quantum Mechanics is so difficult to understand, somewhere Stephen Hawking just walked into a bar.

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What do you call your mom after she brings a guy home from a bar? A very caring woman because she doesn't want him driving drunk.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I told him to. I'm very influential.

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What do you call a person without a heart? Not alive.

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"Knock Knock" "whos there" "interupting cow" "interupting cow who" "i have aids"

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What's white and moves at a glacial pace? A glacier.

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The WNBA

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Why did the car crash? The driver was female.

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What's worse than dying of boredom? ...Being stabbed.

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why did the black guy fall off a cliff? because he was a zombie

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Roses are green Violets are grey Tulips are a lighter grey I am colorblind.

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Yo mama so fat when she looked at the scale it said to be continued

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[Insert dumb, last minute anti-joke here]

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Roses are Red Violets are blue You little stupid ass bitch I ain't fucking with you

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what did luke say to darth vader? Can i borrow ur car please.

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what's worse than jamming a finger in a door the holocaust what's worse than the holocaust jamming 2 fingers in a door

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What do you call a black person trying to swim? Wet.

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Knock knock Who's there? A robber Oh

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Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because it's head's so far from his body.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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A: Knock, knock. A: Knock, knock! A: Um ... Knock, knock! B: Sorry, I didn't want to answer the door.

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Q: What did the poor man do when he saw a Ferrari? A: He realized that he would really enjoy having the money to buy such a nice vehicle, so he decided to take it upon himself to enroll in night classes. After many years of hard work, he earned a degree and a high-paying position at a large software corporation, and bought his dream car. He often told the story to his children as an example of what hard work and a goal in mind could achieve you. He lived a long, productive life and died fulfilled.

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"Docter, docter, I think I have cancer!" "I don't really care."

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What do you do when you go downstairs in the middle of the night and see your VCR floating in the middle of the living room? Run and cower in fear in this seemingly impossible situation.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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