What did the lawyer say to the lawyer We are both lawyers

what did the boy with no arms get for christmas? A pair of robtic arms and now he has super stregth so he fuk up any body who said he would get cancer.

A man bought a white van, He later brutally molested a small boy.

funniest joke ever!!!!!.....chris.

What's black and gets in trouble a lot? A dog with black fur that has not been well trained.

What do you call an Arab guy flying a plane? A pilot.

Knock Knock whos there? a black man ohh ok come in

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

The first train go fowards at 250 mph, and the second train takes a left, how many pancakes are on my rooftop? - The answer is purple because aliens don't dribk coffee

what's grosser then 1000 babies stapled to a tree?? 1 baby stapled to 1000 trees

A proton and a neutron talk to each other. Two atoms are walking down the street one day, and one of them says to the other: "Hey, wait up a second. I think I lost an electron" The first atom replied, "Are you sure?" The second atom said, "Oh, wait. Never mind. I found it."

Do your parents know you're gay?

Why should we dislike all the jokes on the Newest Page? Well you should too. >.>

I'm ginger no more needs to be said...

Whats worse than getting raped by a cow? Getting raped by two cows.

What did your father say before he died? Nothing, he's already dead

What's sad about a pile of dead people? They didn't have life insurance.

“Ok, time for bed” … is what I said to the empty living-room. It was getting late, and the internet no longer amused me. I picked up my cell phone, rooted through the couch cushions until I located the remote, and turned off the television that had been nothing but background noise for the last few hours. I made sure the front and back doors were securely locked, walked around the back of the couch, and turned off the only light. A tap on the screen of my phone created just enough light to keep from busting a toe on an errant table leg. Because my cats have an evil tendency to lie in the middle of the hallway, I aimed the small amount of light from my phone directly in front of my tired and shuffling feet. I’d only covered a small distance before I knew, from many nights of this same regimen, that I was getting close to the bedroom door. At this point my arm started the slow upward arc that would eventually illuminate the now pitch-black opening to the comfort of my room. The light emanating from my cell was quite dim, and this action had become quite rote, so my arc was about waist level before I noticed a slight variation of the familiar black of the open doorway. At that point, and in a disturbingly short amount of time, five things happened nearly simultaneously: My arm, the arm carrying the phone, continued to rise in its predetermined arc, having been an object in motion which would stay in motion. I released a small gasp and exclaimed to my husband that his sudden appearance in the dark had startled the breath from me. I remembered that my husband was at work. The light arc reached its apex on a face of protruding nail-like teeth. A face suspiciously bereft of eyes, with a gaping, oozing, bloody pit where a nose should have been. The light went out.

How high is a Chinaman

"Knock knock..." "come in"

Why did Dom stop smoking? Because he died

Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because its head is so far away from its shoulders.

A man stuck his diick in a blender He had a "penis shake" for breakfast

What did Batman and Robin say when they were going to the Batmobile? To the Batmobile

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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