A man walks into a bar and shuffles his way through the intoxicated patrons. He finds the only open stool and quickly sits in it before any other see it. The bartender approaches him and ask: "What will it be?" The man replies: "Can I have a beer?"

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What do you call kids born in whorehouses? Poor, poor children.

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A man walks into a bakery and buys a doughnut. He then starts to drive home when he realised that he'd forgoten to eat the doughtnut and has to returne to do so.

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Where do you8 find a dog with no legs? right where you left it

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I like my coffee the way I like my women.....without a penis.

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What do a black man and a bench have in common? The black man can sit in the bench.

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roses are red, violets are are blue, I have five fingers, the middle one is for you

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What do you get when you cross isopropil alcohol,ammonia; dish detergent fluid, water, vinegar, and lemon oil? Window Cleaner.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a car.

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Relax, close down the place, he wont get very far. The rest of you better stay inside, and I promise you will all remain safe and secure.

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -The Pizza you ordered. -Oh thank you very much. -That'll be $10. -Here you go. -Thank you very much, sir. Enjoy your meal.

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who steals more than a black person?, a pirate.

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what do you call a muslim driving a plane? a pilot

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Hey guess what? What? You're a Tree.

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What does a man say to his annoying friend? Please stop annoying me now.

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What's worse than Jedward? Nothing. They are really and truly awful.

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What's funnier than Mexicans? Whats funny about Mexicans?

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whats worse than a baby in a dumpster? A baby in ten dumpsters.

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What happened when the black man and the white woman mated? Nothing. The man was infertile.

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A man was jumped by two muggers and fought like hell, but was finally subdued. His attackers then stabbed him. He later died from his injuries.

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Seven

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Why couldn't the child with down syndrome zip up their jacket.... it was a button jacket ... you asshole

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Isn't it funny that we think it's totally normal for females to not have penises but for literally EVERY OTHER group of people, it's weird and not ok double standard?

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What has two arms and two legs? A human being.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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