Q: What's black and white, and red all over ? A: A penguin in a blender.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple?  Getting raped by a 10 foot scorpion.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because at the climax point in the swing, gravity is making a much larger affect on you because you are pulling farther away from the earth as well as positioning your body in a way where it is awkward and unstable to support your body, which greatly increases the chance of you falling off and landing on the ground.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Studies show that 95% of house fires are caused by fire.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because that's where the oncologist's office is.

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Why was Rosa Parks forced to sit in the back of the bus? Rebecca Black decided to sit in the front.

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What do you call a man in a wheel chair? Stephen Hawking

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what did the farmer say when he lost his red tractor?

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Why can't Johnny run? He has no legs.

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A black man walks into a bar. The man behind him ducks.

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Pete and Repeat were on a boat. Pete fell off. Who was left? Nobody because Repeat is a good friend and he went in after Pete.

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why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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Roses are red Violets are blue You touch yourself. I do, too.

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Your mamas so old she died of old age, R.I.P.

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A dyslexic walks into church and asks the priest. "Father is there a dog."

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João Duarte reads this.

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What's the difference between black and white people? One is black.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your doorbell is broken.

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Two black guys walk into a bank They work there.

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three blondes are walking along the beach on a desert island, they each have plans to escape. The first swims off the island but is swept in with the current back to land The second blonde burns an SOS into the sand using a rock and twigs-the wind blows it out The third, realising how immature her freinds were, reaches into her pocket and pulls out her mobile phone and begins dialling the coast guard.

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Man 1: WHAT THE HELL?!?! Man 2: There is no verb in that sentence

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your mumma so fat she ate a horse and she still had room for dinner

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what did little billy say to susie? "why, hello susie."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops