your mammas so poor she is probably going die in a few days of starvation

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What did the little boy say to his cat? Masturbate on my moms corpse.

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how do you make a fat black man cry? Rape his wife.

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An English ship lands in the New World and offers to trade with the natives. The ship actually carried foreign diseases that the natives had no immunity to, and they all died.

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Why are Jews so tight with there money? They want to be finanically stable and provide a future for their familys.

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Q: Why does an elephant have flat feet? A: From jumping out of trees

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knock knock zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz knock knock zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz knock kock ding dong ding di-ding dong zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz sigh weeeeeeeeeewooooooooooooooooo zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz hey yo wake up zzz-oh-huh-what-whos there i've been yelling for like five minutes oh sorry jim will you let me in already all right

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Why can't you get a pterodactyl use the bathroom? Because they're extinct.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw 'em.

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2 tomatoes walk across a road tomato 1 gets hit by a car tomato 2 gets confused, because tomatoes don't have legs and therefore cannot "walk across a road" And furthermore, a tomato does not have a brain, and thus cannot get confused.

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Justin Port#$ falls out of a tree. What happens? he breaks his neck and unfortually dies a long painful death.

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wanna hear a joke? woman's rights.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A worm in your intestinal tract.

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What does an emu an a kiwi have in common? Both are flightless birds endemic to there own countries.

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What is worse than a worm in you're apple? Two worms in you're apple.

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what do you get from sleeping with a hooker? An orgasm

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what did the white rapper say to the black rapper? i like your work. to which the which the black rapper replied, thanks.

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how many drunk drivers does it take to drive home one and only one, if more than one drunk driver tried to drive home at the same time in the same car they would surely crash and not make it home.

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Why did the man get fired? Because he had cancer

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What did the big traffic light say to the little traffic light? It didnt it's a traffic light.

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Why was the ginger crying? Because they used him as the fire hydrant.

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women's rights

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your other apple.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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