A guy walks into a bar. He orders a few drinks then goes home.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you call a dirty black person? Unhygienic

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did Kelliintheraw get punched in the face? Because she is a dumbass

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why is Macaroni Boy so Cool Because He's not

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How do you fit 1,000 Jews in a Volkswagen? Trick question, you can't.

thumb_up thumb_down +141

How do u put an elephant in a refrigerator? -open it up and put it in How do u put a girraffe in a refrigerator? -open it up take out the elephant and put it in All the animals it the world are at a party in Florida. Which one didnt go? -the girraffe, it was in the frige Your trying to cross a river. A sign says alligators everywhere. U have no boat and no bridges. How do u get across? - swim the alligators are at the party in florida

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what's white, sits around all day, and sucks on tits? a baby.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

If quizzes are quizzical, then what are tests? Well, a test is a well thought-out series of questions, usually used in schools to determine a students final grade.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Wanna hear a dirty joke? If so, you're probably a pervert.

thumb_up thumb_down +63

If strippers are exotic dancers then drug dealers are to exotic pharmacists.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

whats used in the kitchen and hurts like fuck? a cheese-grater dildo

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was disowned by his family due to his drug addiction and had nowhere else to go.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What did the little boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A Drumset.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

"Hey look, mommy! I'm a whale!" (child proceeds to pull a shotgun and create a blowhole in his head)

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the German say to the Jew? I'm not quite sure; I don't speak German.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

As Vanilla Ice once said, "If there's a problem ill resolve it."

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? People leading healthy, active lives physically and socially.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I touch myself at night.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Magic! Well not really, you see, people that are stressed have the tendency to remain far longer into the state of hypnosis because their body conciously and subconciously (I am typoing it, but I cant bother to type it correctly fuck it) seek out the state of peace that hypnosis gives more often. Anyway, I know another thing that helps relieve stress, cough... Now, did you know that if you push your nose upwards slightly, you will feel a finger between your legs? its because nerve endings are connected that way, give it a go.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did Sally fall off the swing-set? She had no arms. Knock-knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

what did one caterpillar say to another caterpillar? let's be butterflies

thumb_up thumb_down -61

So,a guy walks up to his friends at the bar and try's to to talk to them,the friends start being rasist ,so the first guy says 'wo guys stop going in that direction ,that one direction

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's worse than an avalanche? Being raped in prison.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How do you confuse a terrorist? Speak another language other than Arabic

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops