How do you get out of a car with only a baseball bat and a hammer? Unlock the door.

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Don't make jokes about the Holocaust. My grandfather died in the Holocaust. He fell off a watchtower.

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Why did people call the girl a cow? Because she was fat.

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what's more funny then being raped? not being a minority!

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Whats worse than a joke? This

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What's the difference between the sky and the ocean? They're both blue

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Why did the monkey fall off? It had no more lives. Why did the second monkey fall off? I dunno. Why did the third monkey fall off? Since the second was unknown, the third does not exist. Why did the little girl died? It's pretty obvious.

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Why is the beach always so angry? The beach is just sand and waves and lacks sentience, but makes up for it in crabs.

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Who gives a shit? Justin Beiber.

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What happens when a guy walk into a school and shoots kids? Oh sorry, to soon?

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Q. When's The Best Time To Wear A Striped Sweater? A. All The Time.

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Q: How can you tell when your selling a Blondel a microwave A: she will keep asking how many chandler the Tv gets

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how can you tell if your moms fat? if Dora can't explore her (mx)

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Chuck Norris witnessed a crime.What did he really witness? A Jehovah's witness. xD

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Knock Knock! Who's there? The doctor. You have aids.

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What's worse than finding out you have cancer? Not much, that would not be so great.

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A bear woke up from his annual hibernation to find that his stomach is growling. "I sure am hungry." the sleepy bear said. So he found some berries, but spit them out. "These berries are far too bitter." the playful bear said. He then found some honey, however was soon bombarded with a swarm of bees. "That honey is good, but not that good." the jolly bear said. He then stumbled upon a cabin. "I wonder if there is any food in here..." the curteous bear wondered. The events that followed are now reffered to by the locals as the May 20th Massacre. While no witnesses survived, the police reports depict that the Martinez family, a young family of 7 enjoying their memorial day weekend in their New Hampshire cabin, was brutally slain by a blood-thirsty animal who tracked each of them throughout the house in a period of approximately 45 minutes.

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Your momma is so fat that she is on a diet and exercises regularly.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? I don't know. He couldn't open it.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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I'm gay.

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Nazi jokes are not funny. ANNE FRANKly they're mean! See What i did there?

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Roses are red, Muslims are brown, When I see them swimming, I hope that they drown!

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John went to the shop to purchase a can of coca cola. He left the shop with a can of coca cola.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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