Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Why did the blonde walk into the men's restroom? Because the blonde was a man who needed to expel his feculent waste.

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Why was the boy drinking toilet water? Because he was receiving a violent swirly. He then went home and killed himself.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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Roses are red Violets are violet the last time i saw this poem i couldn't rhyme no more

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Being a jew in the Holocaust.

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What do you call a boy with no arms or legs that gets stepped on a lot? Mat.

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What's black and white and red all over? A exploding zebra.

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What is a black guys favourite thing to eat? Food.

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a duck walks in to a gay bar and asks for a stick they asked where he wanted it before he could answer he was rapped

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why does it suck to be a black jew you get the back of the oven

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I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

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Tilt your screen back .

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What's the number 1 tip to burning stomach fat? Lighting yourself on fire.

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XD That one was awesome Nero, for a moment I was really wondering if you refer towards a tough guy as yourself as a boy. Now you pretty lucky I like tough guys, and you always have a savage joke at hand don't you?

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What was the blind man's favorite game? Marco Polo

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This time I saw it, so that is covert hypnosis, I mean normally people are aware that they are under a trance, but like now it was like huh? Until the last point there. You used caps in order to make it seem as if you where shouting, the mind reacts that way and bam! The hypnotic state leaves... ...I was kinda beginning to enjoy that... Nice, now I totally do not want to eat this thing, strawberry my butt.

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A boy is diagnosed with terminal cancer. His family prays for him and he still dies.

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What Is big, round, and looks like gaben. Gaben!

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Q: Why did the black man drown? A: Because he couldn't swim.

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one time, a fancy business man walked into a bar. but then he figured out that he wasnt supposed to be there. so he politely apologized to the mortician an and he granted him permission to exit the closet.

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What is Helen Keller's favorite color? Velcro

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knock knock... who's there... i dont know i aint got a house

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what happens when u fall down the stairs? you break your arm.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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